


To Help or To Hinder

by Snarcasm318



Category: Rookie Blue
Genre: A little angst, F/F, Friendship, Gail still hates weddings, Humor, Post-Canon, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-07
Updated: 2016-11-15
Packaged: 2018-08-29 14:06:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 48,091
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8492665
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Snarcasm318/pseuds/Snarcasm318
Summary: Gail has had a rough few years. As 15 Division puts on yet another wedding, her fellow coppers plot to make it a night Gail won't forget. But will their interference help or hinder?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: Still don't own RB or the characters, just borrowing. This one is a multi-chapter arc, but it still won't be a long story. This takes place a few years after Season 6 ended, so everything that has happened on the show has taken place prior to the events of this story.

Gail finished blotting her lips as she checked her reflection in the mirror one last time. She was pleased with the results of her ministrations: her lips were a ruby red, she had a faint trace of blush across her cheeks to liven up her pale skin, but it was her eyes that were her real masterpiece. The royal blue dress she was wearing made the blue in her eyes stand out more than usual and with the simple addition of some eyeliner and mascara they could easily draw a person in and make them never want to look away. Ha, Gail chuckled at the thought, if that were true she wouldn't be going to yet another one of these things alone. Sighing, she brushed her hand over hair. It had grown out since the hair massacre following the Ford incident but she rarely let it grow further than the length she had it as a rookie. That's about how long it was right now and she would need a haircut soon but it made it easy for her to pull off a Marilyn Monroe-esque look for the night. Thinking about the pixie haircut, and who gave it to her, reminded Gail once again how much she hated things like tonight and how much she didn't want to have to suffer alone. Before Gail could give it, or that person, any more thought she was pulled from her memories by a loud pounding on her bedroom door.

"I swear to God Gail, hurry the hell up or we're leaving without you! You are not going to make me late to my own wedding!" hollered Dov through the door, clearly irate.

"Is that a promise Epstein?" Gail had made it abundantly clear that she would not be going tonight willingly.

"Come on Gail, you're one of the groomsmen you're supposed to be making this easier for him," Chris called out from the living room, always the mediator.

"You know it wouldn't be taking you nearly as long if you had just agreed to wear a tux," Dov complained loudly.

"Is Nicholas going to be wearing a dress?" Gail questioned from the sanctity of her batcave. "Because if so, then I will happily change right here, right now. If not, then shut up about the damn tux!" Gail didn't have problem wearing a suit. She knew she could rock formal wear better than the guys, which she pointed out to them both when she went to pick out their tuxes, but she had just gotten this dress and had already decided that she would wear it tonight. Plus, there was no way in hell she was going to let Epstein dictate what she wore for any occasion, nor was she going to let the double standard go. If Nick was one of Chloe's bridesmaids and could wear a suit, then she would wear what she wanted too. Gail sighed before finally opening her door and stepping out into the living room, unnoticed by the guys.

Dov was frantically pacing and even Chris was starting to get nervous. He was trying to take his best man duties very seriously, which meant getting the groom to the wedding on time. "Seriously Gail, we really need to-," but Chris' jaw stopped working at the sight of Gail dressed for the wedding. Even Dov had stopped his nervous movements.

Gail smirked, "Would you guys really rather I wear a suit?"

"Nope, no, definitely not! You look great!" Chris answered quickly.

"Of course I do Diaz, I'm always hot. You losers ready to get this disaster over with."

"Hey this is my wedding," Dov countered with a whine, the pout evident in his voice, "You know one of the happiest days of my life. So can you stop being a bitch long enough for me to enjoy it?"

"Look, you and the Princess asked me to be a part of this. Not the other way around. You know how I feel about weddings and public displays in general. You knew what you were signing up for. Plus, it's not my fault that you're nervous about getting hitched to the nonstop motormouth that is Chloe Price."

"Bite me Casper! I am not nervous about marrying Chloe. I'm excited and that's why I want to get a rush on getting there so I can see my beautiful bride and get started on the rest of my life with her."

Gail wouldn't admit it but she was happy for her friend. Chloe and him were sickeningly perfect for each other, and they were unfathomably more annoying apart then they were together. "Whatever you say, Epstein. Let's go unite the dork kingdom."

* * *

 

"I still can't believe you two are actually getting married in a castle," Gail observed, her voice dripping with contempt as she gazed at the stone building that she would be trapped within for the rest of the night.

"It's super cool, Dov. Very fitting. Romantic," Chris supplied cheerfully. Well at least one of his friends was looking forward to his big day.

"Chloe picked it and I'm determined to make this day amazing for her," Dov replied resolutely. This may have been Chloe's second marriage but Dov was determined that it was going to be the one to last. He wanted to make it as different an experience from her wedding with that douchebag Wes as possible. Which meant making it perfect for her. "I would have married Chloe behind the station for all I cared. I'm just glad she accepted and wants to spend the rest of her life with me," Dov commented dreamily. His puppy dog eyes were filled with love as he thought about his bride-to-be.

"I can't decide who makes me more nauseous, you and the princess gushing about this day or the two of you gushing about this castle. Can we please just get this over with?" Gail complained from the backseat.

"Bring it on Ice Queen, nothing is going to ruin my day today," Dov taunted with a smug grin from the front. That grin left his face when he heard Gail's phone chirp with a text. "Is that from her? Don't forget you promised, Gail!"

Gail was annoyed at the groom. She knew what she had promised, but she couldn't exactly control who texted her. "Yeah, yeah, I know but like I already told you, I didn't invite her, I didn't tell her where it was, and she has a girlfriend. So chill out, it's McNally anyway."

Girl Guide McNally: You guys planning on showing up or what?

Captain Awesome: Already here, tell Princess to relax

Gail wondered briefly, which of the two women was more excited: Price or McNally? They both loved love and weddings. Two things Gail hated but her friends had asked-no-demanded, that she be a part of their "special day". Unfortunately for her, Gail had even begun to think of Chloe as a friend. Yes, her hatred for the woman had greatly decreased when she almost died. But it had been revived when she was revealed to not only be a liar but a cheater, when she failed to mention her marriage to the cop from 27, the one with the annoying partner. Gail hadn't warmed back up to the redhead till they were both TOs and Gail's rookie had made the idiotic choice to talk shit about Price within earshot of his commanding officer. As Gail had coldly berated the punk in front of all the other rookies, she declared that Price was not only his superior, but an excellent officer, who he could only hope to be half as good as one day. And not even God would be able to help him if Gail found out he was insulting or being disrespectful to a superior officer again. She then forced him to buy lunch for her and Price for the rest of his probationary period. Fox learned his lesson, and even Chloe had been in pleasant shock that Gail had defended her, pulling the blonde into a death grip of a hug. As Gail had pointed out that day, only she was allowed to insult Chloe. Gail laughed thinking about the rookie's face after the verbal lashing he received. Ah, maybe thoughts like that could get her through this dreadful day.

* * *

 

Gail braced herself before heading into the building. Today was going to be a long day. She hated weddings but she hated being a part of the wedding party even more. She was expected to walk down the aisle with Nicholas (gross). Then stand in front of the entire room with a smile on her face and not fidget. At least Chris would be next to her for the ceremony. He was less gross and he had honestly been her rock over the last few years. The last five years had been pure hell for Gail. She had been kidnapped by a serial killer, rescued at the cost of Jerry's life, suspended for making a mistake and taking the fall for her friends, abandoned, emotionally cheated on, forced to face said serial killer again, and dumped as a result. A maniac then shot at her, before kidnapping her partner/favorite person at 15 division when she was supposed to be with him. Luckily, Oliver had been rescued even if Sam had been shot in the process. Of course, she had managed to find true love in that time with the coolest chick she knew, and then again in Sophie's eyes along with the realization that she was ready to be a mother before being dumped for a job in another country, blind-sided by her brother's betrayal to the badge, and disowned by her family for refusing to lie in court, oh yeah and that was on the same day that she was forced to admit that she wasn't Sophie's best choice for a new family, and had to lose her little girl as well.

But Chris had stood by her through it all. Since coming back from rehab he had been her rock. He was there for her through the dismantling of the Pecks ordeal and losing Sophie. In fact, he had been the one to suggest they both get their fostering licenses when Dov moved out of the frat house to live with Chloe about a year after the McSwarek wedding. That was almost two years ago, and Gail had spent those years throwing herself into her job trying to prove to everyone that she wasn't a Peck like the others and could be trusted. She had only recently made detective after Oliver had convinced her that if she got the spot, it would be in spite of her name not because of it. Sure it wasn't all work all the time. She had gone on dates occasionally and had plenty of meaningless flings to try to stem the overwhelming feeling of loneliness that occasionally washed over her. But in the end, it was having Chris by her side that had given her the support she needed to drag her ass out of bed each day.

Over the last couple of years she had moved into the bigger room in the apartment that had been vacated by Dov. Her old bedroom had been turned into a guest bedroom that acts as a wait station for whichever of their friends was in the doghouse in their relationships. It had also been home to the occasional foster kid, usually, a kid who had been involved in a case and was waiting for other family members to surface and take them in. Each child had been released to caring homes with responsible family members, so none had needed a permanent place to live but it always made them feel safe to stay with the two cops. It was a weird living situation but made sense to anyone who knew them. Chris had always wanted to be a Dad and Gail was ready to be a Mom, but they both knew they wouldn't be able to do it together forever. In the meantime though, the arrangement worked well. Funnily enough, the person who spent the most time in the extra room was Leo. Traci's son loved to hang out at the frathouse and play video games with Uncle Chris and Aunt Gail (she could beat both of them with her eyes closed) when his Mom had to work late. Traci appreciated the help, but Gail was also mildly convinced that Traci and Chris had some major feels for one another. She had caught them flirting more times then she could count. Maybe tonight she could convince Chris to finally make a move. She could be his wingman. With that thought, Gail chuckled to herself and pushed away from the car and into the castle of doom.

* * *

 

After the whirlwind of getting everyone ready and in place, it was finally time for the wedding. All emergencies had been dealt with and everyone had arrived to the castle in time to find their places. As Gail walked down the aisle beside Nick, she couldn't restrain herself. While keeping the fake smile plastered firmly on her face, she muttered, "Wow Nicholas, nice of you to not bail this time."

"Funny Gail," Nick whispered back, his smile faltering slightly at the thought of their failed engagement in Vegas. The one when Nick had ran off to join the army rather than marry the blonde bombshell. Yep, that one. "It worked out better for both of us this way and you know it." Nick smiled as he passed Juliet on his way to the front of the room.

"I'm just fucking with you Nick. No need to shit your pants," Gail laughed as color returned to his face.

Nick was relieved when he parted ways with Gail at the front. After Gail took her place on the Groom's side, she smiled when Chris escorted Chloe's cousin (the Matron of Honor) down the aisle. Chris bumped shoulders with Gail and clapped Dov on the shoulder with a wide, genuine smile on his face. The nervous-looking groom was even paler than usual but he had a smile on his face none-the-less. He straightened his back when the music changed to announce Chloe's arrival. Gail could begrudgingly admit that the redhead was positively glowing with happiness and love as she made her way towards her groom. Gail smiled a real smile when she saw the look of true astonishment and happiness on Dov's face; it was like he couldn't believe his luck. Finally, Chloe reached her destination and the music stopped. As the officiator began his spiel, Gail heard the door to the room open quietly and someone slip as soundlessly as possible to the back of the seats on the bride's side. Growing up Peck had always made Gail hyperaware of her surrounding, so it was no surprise that she was drawn to the noise. What did surprise her, and make her breath catch in her chest, was the sight of the person who had arrived late. She would recognize that brown hair, those dark glasses, and, especially, that crooked smile anywhere. What the hell was she doing here?


	2. Chapter 2

Holly braced herself before placing a hand on the handle of the door leading into the banquet hall within the castle. She knew she had been running late, but it had been a busy day and she barely had time to change into something remotely appropriate for a wedding, specifically, a wedding for the friends of her ex-girlfriend. The one she left three years ago for a job opportunity, the one she had only just started to get back together with before disappearing all that time ago. The one she hadn't seen since she left, despite returning to Canada to see friends and family for holidays. Yeah, that one. _How the hell did you let yourself get talked into this?_ _Oh well, you're here now Stewart, might as well make the best of it_. With that thought, Holly smoothed out the non-existent wrinkles on her tight black slacks and button down top. Undoing one extra button, before brushing her hair back from her face and adjusting her glasses, she waited till she heard the end of the bride's march and the return of everyone to their seats to push the handle of the door gently.

She slipped in soundlessly, and carefully prevented the door from slamming shut behind her before diving into an open spot in the back row of seats near the aisle. Once she was seated, Holly took in her surroundings. She could quickly recognize her former co-workers from 15 seated at the front of the room on both sides of the aisle. She laughed to herself when she realized that Officer Collins was one of the bridesmaids. She noted how happy, and lovestruck the bride and groom were. She saw the super happy puppy dog expression on Officer Diaz's face before her eyes froze on the gorgeous person standing beside him. Holly was stunned as her eager eyes raked over the blonde bombshell she hadn't seen in years. The woman was truly striking from the perfectly coifed hair, to the tightly wrapped dress hugging her curves, down to the killer fuck-me-heels that accentuated her slim but toned ivory legs. Holly was honestly speechless, her extensive vocabulary failing to perfectly capture the woman at the front of the room. Then she felt the stormy blue eyes lock onto her, and Holly couldn't help but let out a small crooked smile.

* * *

Gail was in shock. Yeah, that's what this feeling was. She knew the ceremony had started but she couldn't hear what the officiator was saying. His voice breaking through her senses only to sound like the teacher from Charlie Brown. Luckily, years of dealing with her family had taught Gail how to keep a stoic face while her mind was whirling a mile a minute. _What the hell is she doing here? Why would Holly be here? Holly Stewart just walked into this room and is actually here? Was she invited? Is she crashing? Why would she crash a wedding in Toronto? Oh shit, is she someone's plus one? Shit, is she my plus one? Did I drunk text her at the bachelor party? No, you idiot, you checked your phone the next morning and you definitely hadn't texted her. Wait, were my eyes too slitty to read my phone properly?_ Ever since Collins pulled that stunt with the drunken videos from the club Gail hadn't remembered texting him, she had been very careful to at least check what she sent the night before so that she wouldn't be caught off-guard again _. Shit, why do I have to be a groomsman, I can't check my phone while I'm up here. I don't even have my phone on me, why didn't I wear a tux?!_

Just as Gail was mentally berating herself, she was pulled from her reverie by the sound of Dov's voice. It was time for the vows and Gail felt her body relax as she actually listened to the words being said.

"Chloe Price, I love catching you off guard, like you caught me off guard. I love knowing that I get to hang out with you tonight, tomorrow night, and the night after as long as you still want to, we'll see, but forever would be nice". Dov smiled. "Chloe, you're..." Dov cleared his throat, "You're a...you're a game changer. It may have freaked me out in the past, but I'm here now and I'm not going anywhere, unless you're coming with me."

"It took you long enough Dov Epstein. I know that you don't believe in fate but I do. Me transferring to 15, meeting you at the engagement party, and even Frank partnering us on my first day was all a part of the universe saying we should be together. Some relationships are direct, they walk a straight line, but ours has always been... squiggly." Chloe did a little dance for emphasis, and wiped some of the tears from her eyes. "We've gone this way and that way, both together and apart. But together, is so much better than apart. You are my best friend, the person who accepts me quirks and all, and the love of my life. I can't wait to spend tonight, tomorrow night, and every night after with you".

As the vows were being said, Gail looked out over her family from 15. Chris and Traci were sneaking looks at one another while smiling. Andy was crying happy tears on Sam's shoulder as he pressed a kiss to her head. Oliver had his arm around Celery as she rested her head on his shoulder after sharing a brief kiss. Across the aisle, Frank and Noelle had their hands interlinked as Frank gently brushed his thumb over the rings on Noelle's left hand. Noelle was seated next to Juliet, who was smiling up at Nick, and his boy-scout smile was beaming back at her. Gail knew they were probably next on the marriage train, unless Oliver and Celery beat them to it.

Looking at her friends, she was happy for all of them. They had all found their persons, their plus ones. And then Gail's eyes drifted, as the groom and bride's words washed over her. Her gaze locked onto the brunette on the back row, the one whose eyes hadn't left the blonde since shortly after she was seated. Knots in her stomach formed as she saw the smile cross Holly's face. Gail couldn't break the eye contact, as she listened to Dov and Chloe promise to love one another for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness, and in health. She didn't look away until she heard the cheers reverberate throughout the room as the couple kissed, and Dov stomped on a glass.

"Mazel Tov!"

* * *

It was the noise of shattered glass that caused reality to set in for Gail and her mind went back into overdrive. _I really don't think I invited her, did Chloe and Dov? But they sent out the invitations months ago. Have they known she was coming for months and didn't tell me? Did Traci try to intervene on my behalf again and invite her as a plus one, and she not tell me? Did Chris? Oh well, you'll find out later, you're a detective after all. You'll just need to interrogate everyone, using whatever force necessary. Alright, focus Peck, you need to decide what you're going to do next...Shit, she is still really hot...Look away Peck, don't get caught gawking like some loser teenager...Fuck! I'm going to have to walk passed her... Nick isn't going to let me run and Chris will be in front of me...I'll have to pass by her...Damn, why does she have to be so beautiful...Seriously, Peck stop staring..._

Gail was stuck, rooted to her spot at the front of the room, not moving even as Chris stepped away to follow the newly wedded couple down the aisle. It wasn't until she felt the gentle tug from Nick, as he interlocked their arms, that she realized she would need to walk. She was grateful her feet could remember to move on their own accord, while she freaked out about being so close to the person she considered her kryptonite. Keeping her gaze firmly locked on Chris' back, Gail wondered how quickly she could flee the building once Nick let her go. It wasn't until she reached the end of the aisle that she made the mistake of looking in Holly's direction. Now that she could clearly see the woman's eyes she felt like she had been kicked in the stomach. She stumbled slightly but Nick kept her balanced, a worried look crossing his face when he realized how pale she had gotten. Before Nick could question Gail, he heard her mutter a brief "thanks", and felt her slip away from him and head in the direction of the rooms the bridal party had used to get ready.

* * *

Holly had just gotten up to approach Gail when she saw her pull away from her escort and dart towards the other side of the room. She let out a sigh, as Nick turned to greet her.

"Dr. Stewart," he felt kind of awkward talking to his ex-girlfriend's ex-girlfriend, in a non-work setting.

"Officer Collins," she felt very awkward talking to her ex-girlfriend's ex-fiancé in a non-work setting.

"Nice to see you here, you look great."

"Thank you, you too. It was a nice ceremony."

A brief silence followed, as neither really knew what to say. They were both usually very comfortable in silence, not feeling the need to make small talk, but this silence felt deafening.

"Are you here for Gail?"

The question was so simple but so blunt, it caught Holly off-guard. This conversation was one of the longest she had ever shared with the man but it was about to get far too personal, far too quickly. "I ummm..."

"If you are, you're going to have to be persistent," Nick said, offering the unsolicited advice. He knew this was awkward but he was happy, and despite everything, he wanted Gail to be happy too. They had known each other for so many years and been through enough together, hell they had put each other through enough. Nick may never know the extent of what his actions and inactions have had on Gail but he knew she had been through enough crap to deserve to find someone like he had, someone who would stick around. "Gail is cold, god she is so cold, and she'll break your heart, if she hasn't already, honestly, she's not really girlfriend material. She is especially difficult if you've left her before, but if you try hard enough and enough times, she'll give you another chance." That was all he really had to offer, never being able to understand the complicated blonde himself. It was a fair warning he thought, and an out if she needed one before she left Gail again.

Calm, cool, and collected Holly Stewart was both shocked and livid. She was ready to go off on the tall man standing in front of her. Not only was he presumptuous, he seemed to think the best way to give advice was to insult the person he was speaking about. Seriously? Holly's mind went into overdrive thinking of ways to cut him down, but before she could let out a retort she heard her name.

"Holly!" Traci greeted the doctor with a warm embrace, as Nick silently slipped away in search of his own date. "When did you get back?"

"Hi Traci, the day before yesterday." The two women had kept in touch since Holly left, but they hadn't spoken in a while.

"Are you back for good or just for a visit?" Traci said, the look in her eyes hinted that she already knew the answer.

Holly was wondering what the detective-sorry-detective sergeant knew, but before she could respond, there was an announcement for everyone to find their seats before the speeches. Traci linked their arms and headed off towards the adjacent room.

* * *

Gail locked the door shut behind her and immediately splashed cold water on her face. She looked into the mirror. _Get it together Peck. Pecks don't get scared, they don't run away, and they certainly don't hide. Figure out what you are going to do and do it. Whatever you do, don't screw up._ But it was Holly, and she was the exception to every one of Gail's rules. She was really here... Holly Stewart was here, in the same country as her, in the same city, in the same room. She let out a little smile that fell just as quickly as it came. She was torn between being ecstatic and absolutely terrified. Right now, the fear was dominating.

They hadn't seen each other over the last three years. After the initial fighting about them each making huge life changing decisions and just expecting the other person to sign on, they had realized they could be angry and bitter for the last two weeks of Holly's stay or make the best of a bad situation. So they agreed to be friends and Gail had even gone so far as to help Holly pack up her townhouse. The last time Gail had seen Holly was just as the driver had arrived to take her to the airport and Gail had headed to her shift that day. Holly left with only a sad, lingering kiss to Gail's cheek, both women refusing to cry anymore and with false promises to keep in touch. But there had been no phone calls, no texts, and no visits. Even when Holly returned to Canada to visit friends or family, they hadn't seen one another. Gail specifically avoided running into Holly on those occasions, not being able to trust herself or her emotions. Especially not her gut reaction to kiss first and ask questions later. She had tried to get over the weird doctor, she had gone on some successful dates, some awful ones, she had slept with a few of the women. But it always seemed to be thoughts of big brown eyes hidden behind dark-rimmed glasses and that crooked smile that haunted Gail whenever she unconsciously reached out to the cold side of her bed. That's why she knew that even one night together and she would be a goner. Gail didn't want just one night, so what the hell was she supposed to do now?

* * *

It was a while before Gail had reemerged from the back room and everyone had already been seated and served drinks. Much to her relief, it appeared that Holly had taken a seat next to Traci at the far end of the table, while Gail was seated next to Chris, across from Nick and Juliet but close to the couple of honor. As much as she wanted to talk to the doctor, she knew that she couldn't trust herself yet. She didn't know what she would say. She desperately wanted to know what had brought the woman back to Toronto, but feared the answer.

Chris whispered to Gail as she appeared, "Why didn't you tell me Holly would be here?".

Gail whispered back defensively, "I didn't know". Before they could discuss it more, it was time for the speeches.

Rather than sit back and relax like most of the guests, Gail rose from her seat. She took a deep breath, trying to calm her frayed nerves. Gail hated public speaking even more than she hated weddings. But here she was, forced to give a speech in front of an entire room of both friends and strangers. She bit back the bile trying to make its way up her esophagus, and took one more shuddering breath as she clenched and unclenched her hands in attempt to relieve some of the anxiety building inside of her. Chris gave her an encouraging nod and Gail cleared her voice.

"I know this is the time that the best man would usually give his speech and I'm sure Chris will, and it will be much better than mine. Before you all accuse me of trying to steal the spotlight, anyone who knows me, knows that I hate public speaking more than I love being the center of attention. So, I will try to get this out as quickly as possible before I puke all over poor Christopher sitting here," Gail said quickly, exhaling an exaggerated breath, and Chris jovially lifted his hands in mock preparation to protect himself. Everyone in the room chuckled; no doubt that the members of fifteen remembered the time Gail bailed on a speech she was supposed to give for an award her mother had received during their rookie year.

"I am only standing here now because I lost a bet." Gail narrowed her eyes at Dov, who had a huge grin on his face, again eliciting a chuckle from the room. "Honestly, I can hardly remember the bet. I can tell you that there was a lot of alcohol involved, there may or may not have been meat cocktails, and I'm fairly certain there were no video games or I'm sure I would have won." The boys and her all shared a smirk, remembering years of living together and competing at video games.

"But I do remember the stakes, as Dov has painstakingly reminded me of them everyday since he bought the ring to propose to Chloe. It was quite simple really: if I lost I had to be Dov's groomsman and I had to give a speech. This very speech, in fact, where I am only allowed to say nice things and only things that are true". Gail stomach flipped when she noticed the smirk on Holly's face, the woman was clearly enjoying her embarrassment.

Turning her attention to the bride, "Chloe, I know you heard about the bet when Dov told you I was going to be a part of your wedding. But the part that you don't know is that this wasn't a vague bet. Dov hadn't simply bet me that I would be his groomsman one day, but that I was going to be a groomsman at his wedding _to_ _you_ one day. What you also don't know, as I'm sure Dov would never want to admit this, is that we made this bet before he brought you that cookie in the locker room". Gail saw the redhead's eyes light up. "Yeah, you were it for him, Chloe. You were the change he needed in his life, when he least expected it, and when he thought he least deserved it." Gail let her eyes glance fleetingly at the woman at the other end of her table, before turning her attention back to the couple.

"After everything you have been through, you two deserve to be together. Hell, the man literally jumped through fire to get to you. If that's not crazy... _stupid_...love, I don't know what is. So congratulations King of the dorks for finding your Queen!" Gail gave the couple a genuine smile and raised her glass, an action that they reflected back at her before sharing a kiss, as the rest of the room cheered.

Gail sat down and released a deep breath, still trying to stem the wave of nausea that had overtaken her, as Chris rose from his seat to give his best man speech. She settled into her seat more comfortably, now that that was over, she could start planning her escape. She made a point of not looking at Holly as she glanced around, taking in the layout of the room, trying to figure out a strategy that could get her out of this mess while under the watchful eyes of a room full of cops. But then her eyes fell onto the waiters preparing to bring out the courses. It would seem the escape would have to wait till after the food was served; Gail couldn't pass up a free meal after all.

* * *

The reception was well under way. The food had been eaten and the drinks poured. Gail had participated in halfway decent conversations with Nick, Juliet, and Chris. She heard all about Vancouver, Juliet's undercover ops, and Nick's work with the ETF out there. As awkward as it should've been talking to them, Gail found that it came pretty easily. Despite what most people might think, the awkwardness Gail usually felt wasn't because Nick was her ex, but the fact that the two people seated in front of her served as a reminder of everything she had lost over the years: relationships, friendships, trust, family both old and new. But it wasn't their fault any of that happened, so, for once in her life, Gail let it go and tried to focus on the fact that they were both genuinely good people who didn't talk just for the sake of talking, an attribute she highly respected. Unlike the bubbly personality of her best friend next to her who was currently filling the couple in on all they missed since the last time Nick had come to visit 15.

At least Gail didn't have to say much. Instead she found herself watching Holly laugh and take part in the conversations at the other end of the table. She felt a small twinge of jealously that the other people were getting to bask in the happiness emanating off the gorgeous doctor. Gail sighed, as much as she wanted to talk to Holly, she still didn't trust herself not to be defensive or cold, or worse be able to prevent herself from pulling Holly into a dark corner and having her way with her. No, that wouldn't be good for the blonde's already fragile heart, no matter how badly she wanted it. So avoidance was still the safest plan.

The bride and groom had been called to the dance floor to have their first dance when Gail began to slowly make her way towards the exit. She hoped that she could slip out while everyone's eyes were on the happy couple. Before she could get too far, she heard the DJ asking for the wedding party to join the bride and groom on the dance floor. Crap! She had to move quickly, but before she could take another step, Gail could feel Nick catching her around the waist, gently lifting her off her feet and spinning her around before firmly steering her towards the other dancing couples.

"Nice try, Gail, but you aren't going anywhere."


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really like where I end this chapter...hope you do too...

"Nice try, Gail, but you aren't going anywhere." Nick said, as he forcefully steered the resistant blonde towards the dance floor.

"I don't know what you mean Nicholas, I wasn't trying to go anywhere, except away from you." Gail said dramatically, dragging her feet along the way.

"Sure, you weren't. You ready?" He asked, positioning them, not waiting for a reply.

"My toes will never be ready for your dancing skills," Gail quipped with an exaggerated smile, before allowing Nick to lead her around the dance floor. Well, she was definitely trapped for at least the duration of this song.

"Hilarious Gail, I should be the one worried about your killer dance moves, that poor waitress barely survived." Nick was referring to a time while they were first dating, when they were at a club together and Gail had toppled over a waitress with her flailing version of dancing.

"Ah, its times like these that I appreciate you moving to Vancouver." Gail said before pausing and taking on a serious expression. "You are careful out there right?" She was referring to Nick's work with ETF.

"Of course Gail, I'm always careful," the man said with his usual bravado but seeing the concern in his friend's eyes, he got equally serious before adding, "Plus, Juliet would kill me if I got myself blown up".

Gail barked out a laugh. "She's not the only one. I'm glad you haven't gone kaboom."

"That's high praise coming from you." Gail punched him in the shoulder with her left hand, as Nick simply laughed. They danced together in silence for a few minutes before Nick ventured out, "So Holly's here." It was a statement, not a question; they only asked questions they needed an answer to.

"Yep", Gail popped the "p" loudly. She watched him carefully as she asked, "Did you know she would be here?"

"Negative, so that's why you were trying to make a break for it."

"I was doing no such thing"

"Uh-huh, sure you weren't. But just so you know there is no heading out early tonight."

Nick gave Gail a little twirl.

"Since when are you my keeper?"

Nick flashed back to earlier in the day...

_"Knock, knock." Nick said as he slowly opened the door to the bride's changing room. "Bridesmaid at your service, you wanted to see me?" Nick smiled as he watched Chloe's face break into a wide, mischievous grin._

_"I have a mission for you, should you choose to accept it."_

_Nick immediately assumed a rigid military stance as he had been trained, schooling his features into a stoic face._

_"At ease soldier," Chloe laughed as Nick relaxed his stance, she loved that this man would always play along with her. "This mission is of the upmost importance. Tonight, you are to ensure that groomsman, Detective Gail Peck, does not leave the reception early for anything short of a quadruple homicide. You are to detain her by any means necessary. No matter what she says or does, she has to remain in the building till an acceptable hour." Chloe explained with a serious expression and drill sergeant voice._

_"I accept the orders ma'am."_

_"And you are prepared to risk life and limb to complete said mission."_

_"Ma'am, yes, ma'am."_

_"Good, thanks Nick, you're the best bridesmaid ever." Chloe dropped the act and hugged the man in front of her._

_"Of course, whatever the bride wants, the bride gets. Are you going to tell me why this is so important?"_

_"Nope, that's on a need-to-know basis and it's a surprise for Gail. Don't worry though, I've recruited back-up."_

...Coming back to the present, Nick responded, "Since I was placed under strict orders to keep you here till a reasonable time. So, _please_ , just make tonight easy for the both of us and play nice."

"Orders from who?" Gail narrowed her eyes, shooting her ex-fiancé a look she was sure could pierce his soul. She needed answers about what her ex-girlfriend was doing here.

But Nick had faced the horrors of war and could handle the Ice Queen's wrath, as he had dubbed it. "I'm not at liberty to discuss that."

Gail stopped moving, ready to rip Nick a new one, when he gave her a smile, "Come on Gail, you know I won't say and you can always kill me later, let's just dance for now"

Weighing out her options, Gail resumed moving, deciding to try a different tactic with soldier boy. "You know, you owe me one."

"I owe you, for what?" Nick braced himself, "You're not about to bring up Vegas again are you?" he questioned exasperatedly.

"No, Nicholas, you were right, it worked out best. I meant with Juliet."

Now Nick was honestly confused. "How do you figure?"

"Simple. If I hadn't thrown my biodegradable popsicle stick out the window, you wouldn't have opened the unmarked's door, and sent her flying off her bike and into your heart," Gail explained with a cheesy smile.

"Only in your head, would that make me owe you. Didn't you film the whole thing on your phone just to embarrass me." Statement, not a question, he knew the answer.

"Yep, and now you will have something to show the kids and grandkids when you tell them about how you met their mother."

Nick couldn't help the goofy grin on his face at the thought of a future with Juliet. A future that for once didn't scare him. Hmm...Maybe he had gotten over his commitment issues. He looked around the room before spotting his girlfriend talking to someone that would not make Gail happy. "Don't look now, but it seems that my girlfriend is talking to yours."

Gail spun around so hard she thought she had whiplash. "What?"

* * *

Holly found herself standing next to a petite brunette, who seemed to be watching the same couple as her with rapt fascination. She recognized her from the other end of the table; the woman had been seated next to Officer Collins.

"You know Officer Collins?" Holly tried to determine who exactly this woman was.

"Yeah, he's my boyfriend. Officer Juliet Ward," she offered a hand.

"Dr. Holly Stewart. So are you here just for Officer Collins or do you know the bride and groom as well? "

_Crap, how to explain this to a stranger?_ "Umm, actually, I worked with 15 for a short time on an investigation before heading back to Vancouver." Satisfied with what she deemed a safe response, Juliet decided to shift gears, "So doctor, how do you know the married couple?" she asked as her natural instincts to find out everything about the people around her kicked into gear.

"Please, call me Holly. I used to work for 15 division as a forensic pathologist. I left a few years ago."

"Wait, you're that Holly?"

Holly just looked at the woman, extremely confused. "Yes?"

Juliet laughed, no wonder the rest of 15 were so hell bent on their plan for tonight. This woman was quite attractive, but she had a hard time picturing Gail with someone who seemed so...Nice? Friendly? Sociable?... "I've heard a lot about you."

"Oh? From who?"

"Well everyone, but Chloe mostly. You have a lot of fans around here."

Holly blushed, "Thanks."

The two women fell into a comfortable silence, only broken when they both laughed as they watched Gail punch Nick in the shoulder.

"Their dance appears to be going well." Holly observed, wondering if she could pull the cantankerous blonde into a dance as well.

"Well, Peck hasn't killed him yet, so I guess I'll have to thank her for that later."

Holly finally pulled her eyes from the dancing blonde couple to take in the other couples preparing to enter the dance floor. She noticed Traci whisper something to Officer McNally, who was pulling Detective Swarek out of his seat and onto the floor. Then, Traci was making her way over to where Holly stood with Juliet. When she finally reached them, she exchanged a brief greeting with Juliet, before the woman scampered off to pull Nick away from Gail before the blonde actually harmed him.

* * *

When Juliet approached and asked to cut in, Gail didn't hesitate to pull away from Nick. She saw this as her chance to run, but before she could really try, Chris was pulling her back.

"Dance with me, please?" He asked Gail with his most winning smile.

"I really don't want to dance right now Christopher."

"Please Gail, I love this song, it was my request." It was only then that Gail noticed the song had changed. It was indeed one of Chris' favorites, one that Gail had heard far too many times catching a ride in his truck. In fact, he had played it so often, that it had gotten stuck in Gail's head to the point that she had allowed him to add it to her iTunes. It had even gotten a place of honor on one of her playlists, one very particular playlist.

"Fiiiiiiiine, but just this one."

Chris smiled triumphantly, before pressing his luck, "So Holly?"

Gail deflected, "So Traci?"

Chris' face reddened, "What do you mean?"

"Come on Chris, I know you have a thing for her. And who wouldn't? She's hot, smart, patient, and a great mom. I know how much you care about her and Leo, why not just make a move?"

"Wow, Gail, sounds like you're the one with the crush."

Gail scoffed, "She's not my type."

"Right, she's not a sexy librarian." Gail glowered. Chris chuckled nervously, Dov had told him that one after Fight Night.

Gail decided to continue her previous train of thought, "Really, though, I saw you and her sneaking glances during the ceremony. You two both deserve happiness and a stable relationship. You would be good together. Plus, we've all known each other for way too long, you guys don't have to explain all your baggage to each other."

"Gail," Chris was at a loss for words. Sure, it had crept up on him, the realization that he had a crush on one of his best friends, but he really didn't want to admit it or mess it up. It had started when they danced at the McSwarek wedding and had only grown the more time he spent with both Traci and Leo. "I don't want to mess up the band."

"Chris, we're not a band, and it's time to nut up or shut up. She's a catch and you'll lose her if you don't make a move. No worries though, I got your back."

"You know I could be saying the same thing to you."

"I don't have nuts," Gail deflected once again, earning a crimson blush across Chris' cheeks.

"Ha-ha, you know what I mean, you should make a move." Gail just gave Chris a hard stare, trying to silently get him to drop the topic. "Or not. But I do have your back Gail. Always have, always will."

Gail smiled shyly at Chris, "Yeah, I know."

Chris knew better than to press his luck, so they just continued to dance in silence. Both of their eyes darting to the women they had been talking about, who happened to be talking to one another across the room.

* * *

Holly couldn't help but notice the unusually hasty exit, "You and Juliet not like each other?"

Traci sighed, "It's not that. Juliet was the undercover IA officer who investigated the bombing." She didn't need to say anymore, she knew Holly knew. "Anyway, she tends to remind me of Steve. I still hate him for what he did, but especially, for making me unstuck, only to betray me, and make me feel stuck again."

She had Holly's undivided attention, "Stuck?" she questioned gently.

"Yeah, you know, stuck, not knowing what to do. Sure, I'm good with the job, I understand what to do next when it comes my work. Become a police officer, make detective, then detective sergeant. It's my personal life that I don't know what to do with. Everyone always hands out advice like 'Life is short, so jump in'. 'Life is risky, so play it safe'. A part of me just wants to go on dates and have fun. But it always ends in some horrible way. So, I'm stuck, I can't move forward and I can't stay still."

Holly sort of knew what the woman meant. It was a big reason why she was a runner, both literal and metaphorical. As dedicated to her career as the woman could be, she always hated being stuck in the same place for too long, always feeling restless. It's what inspired her to constantly move from one job opportunity to the next, under the guise of ambition. Sometimes, she wondered how she ever made it through the years of medical school and residency without bolting. It's also why she sought out fun, uncomplicated relationships that she could easily escape without permanent damage. That was, until Gail, that woman was far from uncomplicated. It's also what made being back in Toronto so difficult for her. Holly liked clean breaks and fresh starts. She had spent her life looking forward, never looking back or wasting time wondering _what if,_ and yet, here she was coming face-to-face with her past, wondering about everything.

"You should move forward, but maybe you just need to find someone to give you a reason to get back out there." The doctor suggested.

"Maybe," Traci smiled as she watched Chris and Gail dance.

Holly noticed the look, "Or maybe you already have someone in mind? Diaz is a great guy, handsome, if you're into men. If not, I know a lot of available ladies." Holly joked, while nudging the woman beside her.

Traci let out one of her bright laughs, "You offering doc?"

Holly just smiled, "You accepting?"

"Ha, I don't think I'm your type."

Holly nodded, accepting the end of their banter, knowing whom Traci was referring to. She continued to watch the roommates, _were they still roommates?_ "Do Gail and Chris still live in that apartment together? What did they used to call it?"

"The frathouse. Yeah." Traci was ready to expand, but didn't want to reveal too much about the blonde's life, knowing Gail wouldn't appreciate it. Instead she joked, "Curious about where you'll be spending the night?"

Holly choked on her sip of champagne. Traci gently patted her on the back as her coughing fit subsided. "You ok there, doc?"

Holly just nodded, as she wiped tears from her eyes. She slowly regained her composure.

As the song was coming to a close, Traci got a wide smile on her face. "Ready to dance?" She asked, pulling Holly onto the dance floor in the direction of Chris and Gail. She made sure to make eye contact with Andy as she crossed the threshold.

* * *

Andy made her way over to the DJ and whispered something into his ear, unbeknownst to Gail. She was too distracted by the two women making a beeline towards her and Chris. She wanted to pull away but Chris just tightened his hold, and dipped her instead. As Gail came back up, Traci interjected, "May we cut in?"

Gail responded first, "Of course Trace, I knew you always had a crush on me", pulling the woman towards her and leading her away from the other two brunettes.

Chris grinned sheepishly and shrugged, offering a hand to Holly. "Would you like to dance, Dr. Stewart?"

"Sure, Chris, and please, call me Holly."

"You look great tonight, Holly."

"Thanks Chris, you do too."

The two danced in silence for a good portion of the song. Both lost in their own thoughts, when Chris finally broke it.

"You know love's not unconditional. Like, there's always conditions. I mean, I guess sometimes parents can love their kids unconditionally, like I did with Christian and Traci does with Leo, but that's only sometimes, not everyone can do that. When it comes to relationships though, there's always conditions."

Holly just let the ramble go on, unsure of how to respond, she offered an "I suppose."

Chris looked at Holly. "There are a lot of conditions to loving Gail. She doesn't make it easy and she doesn't like to let people in but she's worth it."

Holly knew this, but she wasn't sure where he was going with the speech. Her natural curiosity made her want to hear him out.

"Are you here to stay Holly? In Toronto, I mean. Because if you are, that's good, but if you're not, then you shouldn't mess with her. She still cares about you and it would suck if you just up and left again. So if you don't plan on sticking around, please just leave her alone."

Holly was surprised with the seriousness on Chris' face; he was almost always smiling, even when Gail was mocking him incessantly. She wanted to answer him, to reassure him, but she wasn't sure of the answers herself.

* * *

"Gail, what the hell are you doing?" Traci demanded, as the blonde led her around on the dance floor.

"Dancing...What Trace? You were the one that wanted to dance." Gail knew what Traci had meant but she wasn't about to give in that easily. She hated being forced into situations by people, even people like Traci, whom she actually considered a friend.

"You're avoiding Holly." Traci usually knew when Gail needed a push in the right direction.

"I'm not avoiding anyone, I'm just dancing with my friend who has a crush on me." Gail responded cockily to the accusation.

"I don't have a crush on you."

"Your loss. I'm the better roommate."

"What?" Traci responded incredulously.

"What the what? I'm not blind; I've seen the way you and Chris look at each other and flirt. You two would be great together and you already know he's great with Leo, it's not like you would be introducing someone new to him." Gail responded, matter-of-factly.

"I'm not..."

"You are, and its ok Trace. He's one of the few good guys I know. So give him a chance but don't hurt him."

Traci looked at her friend seriously. "You don't like to share. And I remember what happened with you and Andy over Nick."

Gail brushed it off, "This isn't that. They were sneaking around behind my back and Nick had already wanted to be with Andy when we were together. Plus, it was Andy's betrayal that hurt worse: she cared so little about our friendship that she would rather have a fling with Nick while still stuck on Swarek, even if it hurt me. You and Chris, though, you guys just make sense." Gail was being weird tonight, _Why am I sharing so much information?_ She'd only had one glass of champagne so far. _Shit_ , _I must be off my game_. _Shake it off, Peck_. _Wait I know this song..._

Traci took in what the blonde was saying. That was the second time in a row, she was being told to take a chance with Chris. He was handsome, and caring, and trustworthy but still fun and childlike. Maybe they were right. But Traci couldn't let it go; tonight wasn't about her love life. She noticed the blonde make a weird face. "What's wrong?"

"The song...it's a weird song for a wedding."

Traci listened to the song; yep, she knew which one it was. "I like it."

"I like it too, but it's not a wedding song." Gail continued to frown. She had just been listening to the song last night on her phone.

"Maybe not, but it is a good song to dance to with someone important."

"Are you implying you're not important Trace?"

"You know who I'm referring to." Traci wasn't giving up.

"Did you invite her here?"

"No, Gail, I didn't, I swear."

Gail narrowed her eyes, "Did you know she was coming?"

Traci hesitated, recalling the events of the previous night...

_"Alright, I'm glad you all could make it," Chloe said. She had called a last minute meeting at the Penny, claiming a wedding emergency. "Ok, we need to make tomorrow night into a super romantic night. I mean, I know it will already be romantic because, duh, Dov and I are getting married, and you all get to bask in our love and happiness. But we need to make it extra romantic for our subject..." Chloe produced a picture, "...Detective Gail Peck." She studied the faces of each of the women seated around her. Traci, Andy, and Juliet all shared worried glances. None were ready to commit to the undertaking of surprising Gail._

_Traci was the first to speak up, "OK Chloe, I think we need a little more information."_

_"I ran into Holly today." The redhead let the news sink in._

_"As in Holly Stewart?" Traci clarified._

_"As in Gail's Holly?" Andy croaked._

_"Who's Holly?" Juliet figured she should at least know what she was signing up for._

_"Yep, that's the one. Gail doesn't know she's here. Actually, I don't really know why she's here either." Chloe frowned realizing she hadn't gotten that information. She had been so excited at the prospect of the doctor being back in Toronto and getting her to the wedding that she didn't really give her a chance to speak._

_"Where did you see her?" Traci was in full-on detective mode._

_"At the precinct."_

_"Was she looking for Gail or me?" Traci was confused as to why the doctor wouldn't have told her she was around._

_"Nope, she was looking for Oliver."_

_"That's weird," Andy piped in. "Alright, so she's coming to the wedding and Gail doesn't know." Hoping that she was piecing it together wrong._

_"Yep!" Shit, thought Traci and Andy, Gail is going to kill them and the bride at her own wedding._

_At the worried looks, Juliet spoke up, "Umm, Chloe, Gail doesn't seem like the type of person who likes surprises."_

_"Nonsense. She'll like this one. Plus, if we tell her beforehand, she'll figure out a way to ditch, bet or no bet. You guys know she's a flight risk and how she feels about weddings. Plus, she's already gonna be hella nervous having to give the speech." Chloe wasn't sure why, all anyone would tell her is that Gail hated public speaking more than anything else and Traci once had to step in for her when they were rookies._

_"Alright Chloe, exactly what do you have in mind?" Chloe explained her plan. After being shot down for some of her more elaborate ideas involving hot air balloons and towers, they agreed to keep it simple: romantic music, romantic setting, forced interaction, no escape, and to catch the blonde off-guard. "Ok, we'll get Chris and Nick to be on watch duty to prevent Gail from sneaking out. But we can't tell them why they have to do it."_

_"Why not?" Juliet really didn't want to lie to her boyfriend, again._

_"Because Chris will buckle under the pressure and tip off Gail, and Nick will tell us to tell her and may not agree to help." Andy supplied, knowing both men's reactions._

_"Exactly! Dov will talk to Chris and I'll talk to Nick. So obviously the setting is already romantic, and we can cut-off her escape. Traci, you'll be in charge of getting them to interact as much as possible in a totally chill, nonchalant way. Juliet, you'll help Nick with making sure she doesn't vanish, because honestly, she's a sneaky one. Andy, you'll help me with making sure we keep the romantic element alive. As for the music," Chloe produced a list of weird songs on her phone. "Everyone needs to choose a song off this playlist. Dov is getting the guys to do the same. This will be our Golly playlist for the night. Anytime, they're in the room together, we'll try to get the DJ to play some of these songs."_

_"Chloe, where did you get the list?" Traci eyed it suspiciously. It had some really peculiar songs on it, that were either melancholic or oddly romantic and seemed to encompass every genre, but none were really wedding songs._

_"Dov sent it to me, don't worry, they're good, mood-setting songs."_

_The women proceeded to iron out the rest of details before moving on to other wedding related stuff._

...Traci snapped back to reality, as she felt the blonde's suspicious glare grow. She didn't want to lie to her friend, she sighed, "Not till the last minute."

"But you did know before showing up here." Statement, not a question, she already knew the answer.

"Yes, but Gail-"

"No buts Traci, you know how I feel about surprises! Why didn't you tell me? Why is she even here? God I can't believe you kept this from me!" Gail kept her voice low, but the anger was palpable.

"Would you have shown up if I had told you?"

Gail knew she had a point not that she wanted to admit it, "That's not the point, you should have told me, you shouldn't have let me be blindsided." Gail still felt betrayed. She hated being caught off-guard and really hated when people made decisions for her. It reminded her of growing up with the Pecks, the constant pressure to do what they wanted and not knowing what they were going to throw at her next, like dumping her at the mall on the other side of town when she was eight and having to figure out her way home, or worse: the traditional wilderness survival test. She shuddered just thinking about it.

Before the argument could escalate, Chris swooped in, asking to dance with Traci. _Thank God,_ she thought as she gratefully accepted and tried to scurry as far away as possible from the incensed blonde. She would need some time to cool down before Traci could talk to her again. Gail glared at the backs of the couple as they moved away.

* * *

Holly watched the blonde carefully as they stood awkwardly together on the dance floor. After the couple moved far enough away, Gail suddenly became extremely interested in her shoes. She could feel the rest of her nosey friends' eyes watching her from their own couplings. _Shit, now what? Do I ask her to dance? Does she want to dance or did Traci put her up to it? Why can't they just mind their own business? Is it too late to run? It's probably too late to run without her thinking you're actually insane Peck._

"May I have this dance?" Holly offered her hand gallantly, causing Gail to finally look up at her, before quickly averting her eyes. She had given Gail that lop-sided smile of hers, the one that always got Gail to agree to anything she wanted.

Without a word, Gail accepted the hand and felt Holly pull her in, the strong tan arms wrapping effortlessly around the blonde's petite waist, like they belonged there, like they never left.

They danced quietly, the next song coming on, and Gail listened intently to it. It was a song that always reminded her of Holly and yet another one in her music library. She was growing more suspicious by the moment of the weird musical selection, this one was by a relatively obscure band that she knew her friends didn't listen to. Chloe and Dov might be weird and untraditional, but they could also be very cunning. She was pulled from her thoughts of her traitorous friends when Holly pulled her ever so slightly closer.

"You should breathe," Gail let out the breath she didn't realize she was holding, as Holly's soft voice washed over her. She didn't trust herself to look at the gorgeous brunette with them standing so close together, instead, she was biting her bottom lip so hard she was convinced she would draw blood soon. Holly couldn't help but smile at how adorable the blonde looked when she was nervous. Holly was nervous too, there were things she wanted to say but she wasn't sure if this was the best time to say them, questions she wanted to ask but didn't know if she would get an answer or a fight, or Gail's patented cat-like responses. More than anything though, Holly just wanted to enjoy the feeling of the blonde woman in her arms once again.

"You look..." Holly ran through her extensive vocabulary once again, trying to find the best word to describe the woman swaying in front of her. "Enchanting" she finally settled on, but still felt the word was inept.

"Enchanting?" Gail finally looked up at Holly, well more accurately she lip-looked her. Yep, this is why Gail didn't trust herself.

Holly chuckled and looked around the banquet hall before shrugging, "Seemed appropriate for the venue".

"Well, when you're a Disney princess a castle is kind of a wedding requirement."

"Hmmm", Holly seemed to ponder the thought before saying, "It's not _quite_ a fairytale. But it's still kind of beautiful."

Gail blushed as she remembered the first time Holly said those words to her when she sat drunk and hairless in her bathtub. The doctor decided to take it a step further. She dropped her voice an octave before continuing, eyes unwavering from the woman in front of her, the one who, once again, wouldn't look at her, "Maybe beautiful isn't the right adjective. It seems insufficient...how about...breathtaking...alluring...ravishing...devastatingly gorgeous...enticing..."

Gail couldn't stay quiet any longer, she looked at Holly incredulously, "Enticing, really?"

"Very."

When they locked eyes, Gail was certain the darkening of Holly's eyes was mirroring her own. She wasn't sure which of them started it but she could feel them both begin to slowly close the gap between them. She could feel the gravitational force of Dr. Holly Stewart pulling her in once more. Before they could clear the distance between them, Gail felt herself forcibly wretched away from her dance partner and heard a familiar voice say, "May I cut in?"

"What the actual fuck?" Gail whipped around venomously; ready to destroy the interloper who dared to touch her. "Frankie?!"


	4. Chapter 4

"Frankie?! What the hell are you doing here?" Gail demanded to know.

"Clearly trying to dance, come on Peck, get with the program." Detective Frankie Anderson swayed slightly where she stood, and it had nothing to do with the music. Gail could smell the alcohol coming off of her in waves, as Frankie pulled her closer. _Great_ , _just great, she's hammered and handsy,_ Gail thought to herself. She kept her attention on the drunken detective, not chancing a look at Holly to see her reaction to the spectacle, or to the fact that the other woman was still trying to get Gail to dance. Gail and Frankie had drank enough times together for the blonde to know that Frankie could hold her liquor fairly well but that it tended to make her even bolder than usual, physically and verbally, which was saying a lot. "By the way, you suck at responding to texts."

Gail realized that when she had checked her phone earlier to see if she had texted Holly, she had ignored the messages she had from Frankie. She had hoped that by ignoring the detective she could avoid a situation like this. In fact, Gail had specifically promised Dov, as he had ungraciously reminded her that night, that she wouldn't invite Frankie as her plus one or even so much as talk about tonight with her. Not that it should've mattered, Frankie was supposed to be on a date with the nurse...Mary? Maria? Marissa _?_ Whatever the hell her name was, that she had been seeing for the last month. That had been surprising enough, the fact that Frankie had actually seemed close to finally settling down, something she claimed to never be interested in, something she thought she had in common with Gail. Sure, the last wedding they had been at had culminated in drunken hate sex, which morphed into a brief friends-with-benefits package that a couple of years later was simply friends, no benefits.

"You hate dancing and weddings and most things in general, Frankie. So, what are you doing here?" Gail repeated, hoping to get an answer and maybe a clue as to how to get her out before Dov or Chloe saw her, or vice versa. She also hoped that by distracting Frankie, she would be able to steer her back towards the exit. She pulled the woman off the dance floor easily enough, which had been facilitated by the fact that Holly and Gail had somehow drifted towards the edge and away from the crowd while they were dancing. _Good job Peck, even your subconscious wants you to have Holly all to yourself. Oh well, let's deal with one crisis at a time._

"I...was invited." Frankie drawled, "Just not by you. Which I mean, is all good Peck, clearly there are other, more interesting women here to entertain me tonight." She pulled her arm away from Gail and threw a smirk in Holly's direction. "You seem familiar and way too hot to be wasting your time in a place like this. I could make your night a lot more interesting than Peck here."

Before Holly could respond, Gail pulled Frankie's attention back to her, "Who? Who invited you?"

"Easy there detective-with-training-wheels. Not the bride or groom, as you very well know, though I should probably give the muppet and pigeon my congratulations."

"And this is why you weren't invited."

"I'm no worse than you."

"You are when you're drunk." It was true, depending on the drink, a _very_ drunk Gail tended to be more vulnerable and self-destructive (bourbon) or carefree and flirty (tequila), while drunk Frankie tended to be surlier than usual (whiskey) or make truly awful decisions in the women she picked up (tequila). What did hold true for both women was that they had a high alcohol tolerance, so a drunk Frankie meant she had had way too much and tonight appeared to be a whiskey night.

"I'm not drunk, you just have a stick up your ass. Which is why I'm here with Gerald and not you."

It was only then that Gail had noticed Officer Moore heading their way. "Damn it, Gerald!" Gail growled. Even after transferring to a different division, he was still managing to screw up.

"That's Duncan ma'am. And Detective Anderson offered to be my plus one and my wingman tonight when I bumped into her outside of the Penny." He smiled brightly, which elicited a grimace from both Frankie and Gail, while the blonde continued to try to maneuver the resistant brunette out of the room.

They were only halfway to the exit when she noticed Chris charging her way. His jaw was set and the flush creeping up his neck was one of anger. _Crap!_

"Gerald, who thought it would be a good idea to invite you? And why, in the hell, would you think it was a good idea to bring a drunk lesbian as your wingman to the wedding of a woman she hates? You know what, don't answer that. You need to leave, now!" She ordered sternly, continuing in her efforts to head toward the exit.

Duncan answered anyway, "Because she is always picking up different chicks. Not that I need help, but I figured it couldn't hurt if two people were working the crowd."

"That's because she's hot and has game, unlike you. Now, let's go."

"Quite the charmer, Peck, we heading to yours or mine?" Frankie slurred.

"Gail you promised!" _Shit!_ Chris had reached them and was livid. An angry best man was just what Gail needed right now to add to the three-ring circus that was quickly becoming her night.

_This is why I hate surprises,_ Gail thought to herself before stating, "I know what I promised Diaz, blame Gerald over here. We can argue about this outside, but help me get her out of here before the happy couple notices too."

* * *

Holly was both shocked and frustrated when she felt Gail get pulled away from her, immediately missing the connection they had been sharing before being rudely interrupted. It was the first time that night that she had gotten the cop to herself. She watched the interaction between the blonde and the pretty brunette with an intense focus, trying to solve the mystery of who this woman was and what she was to Gail. _Stop acting like a jealous girlfriend, Stewart. You have no claim on the sardonic blonde anymore. You lost that when you left her and the country altogether. What the hell were you thinking anyway? You were supposed to be talking to her, not flirting with her, and certainly not trying to kiss her. You're never going to figure this out without talking._

Holly knew that she should be showing more restraint. _But she looks so gorgeous tonight and her lips were so close...Keep it in your pants, Stewart. You don't even know if she's seeing anyone or interested. Hmmm...If that's true than why would both of her ex-boyfriends warn you about messing with her, surely they would've mentioned it. Oh yeah brainiac, then why is she currently leaving with another woman, and why did that woman look so familiar?_ Holly continued to get lost in her thoughts until she was pulled from them by the approach of Traci.

"Was that Detective Anderson from homicide?" Holly ventured out, remembering that she had worked with the woman on a few murders before she left. In fact, Detective Anderson had flirted shamelessly with Holly both at the crime scenes and in the lab. While Holly always appreciated wit and a challenge (obviously), something about the woman had been a little too abrasive for her.

"Yeah, looks like Frankie decided to crash." Traci answered simply.

"She wasn't invited?" That seemed odd to Holly, if she wasn't invited why would she show up and why would Gail be her first stop?

"Not tonight, Frankie and Gail tend to feed off one another when it comes to insults, especially when they're both drunk, and Frankie's favorite target is Chloe. Since Gail was part of the wedding, it kind of seemed like a good idea to only have one person here insulting the bride and groom. Plus, Frankie was supposed to be busy."

"Ah, so Gail and Detective Anderson are friends?" Holly questioned, her voice laced with something that sounded an awful lot like optimism.

"You could say that, listen, I should probably go out there and give Gail some back-up," Traci left before having to clarify her last statement. When she had tried to help Gail and Frankie get together at the last 15 wedding, it was in an attempt to get Gail out of the slump she had been in after everything had gone to hell that year. But, that wasn't something she wanted to discuss with the good doctor, especially not when she was supposed to be on "Operation: Romance Golly" (Chloe's idea).

As Traci walked away, Holly let out a sigh and headed in the direction of one of the champagne servers. Before she could reach her destination, she ran into the bride.

Chloe beamed when she saw Holly, "Holly, I'm so glad you came!" Chloe had set up the plan to get Gail and Holly together, but had been a bit busy actually getting married to know if it was working. She knew that the doctor had said she would come, but she could never be sure if people were just saying what she wanted to hear to shut her up.

* * *

_The day before..._

_Holly had been walking through 15 Division partly in a daze when she felt someone crash into her, sending her to the ground and her glasses askew._

_"I'm so sorry, let me help you up. I wasn't watching where I was going, which I usually am because, duh, it's rude to crash into people. But then again, you probably weren't paying attention either if you didn't see me coming down an empty hallway. I mean maybe I shouldn't have been dancing, but I'm just so excited for tomorrow...wait, Dr. Stewart? What are you doing here?" Holly settled her glasses back on the bridge of her nose and looked up to see Officer Chloe Price standing over her, offering her a hand to pull her up. One she accepted, as she gingerly got back to her feet._

_"Hi, Officer Price. I was actually looking for..."_

_"Gail!" The redhead cut-in, assuming that the doctor had returned to Toronto at the invite of the cranky blonde detective, before launching into one of her infamous rambles, "Oh, did she invite you to the wedding tomorrow? I thought she wasn't planning on bringing a date? I mean, she might have said that just so I wouldn't ask who it was, but it's totally ok if she had changed her mind and you were coming because obviously you are more than welcome to come. I'm just surprised she didn't tell any of us, but then again she does like to keep things to herself in that weird, aloof, loner, too-cool-for-anyone else kind of way, kind of like a cat now that I think about it."_

_Holly interjected, concerned that the officer wouldn't get enough oxygen if she continued on her ramble without breathing. "Actually, I was here looking for Staff Sergeant Shaw."_

_"Oh, Oliver is out to lunch right now but he'll probably be back soon. You are coming tomorrow though right?"_

_"I'm sorry, what's tomorrow?"_

_"My wedding, silly. Dov and I are getting married! Wait, Gail really didn't invite you?"_

_"Umm, no, we haven't spoken recently. I really was here to speak to the Staff Sergeant about something."_

_Chloe frowned and studied the woman in front of her. She was very composed but a flash of sadness seemed to cross her eyes at the mention of the prickly blonde. Chloe knew how Gail had felt about Holly, hell anyone with eyes could see it from a mile away. The doctor had softened her and had actually made her nice and Gail had been a wreck when they weren't talking. She had even gotten herself stuck in a shirt. A thought clicked in her head, "You should come tomorrow anyway. Both Gail and Oliver will be there so you will have plenty of time to talk to both of them."_

_"Oh, um, thank you for the invitation but I really shouldn't..."_

_Chloe cut her off again, "No, you really should come. And since I'm the bride and it is my day, you kind of have to do what I want. Yep, I'm pulling the bride card."_

_Holly realized that arguing was futile, plus maybe it could shed some light on some things for her..._

* * *

Smiling widely Holly greeted the blushing bride, "Hi, Chloe, thank you for inviting me. You look beautiful and the ceremony was wonderful. Congratulations."

"Thank you!" Chloe chirped, giddy with the excitement that her and Dov were officially married. "I saw you and Gail dancing together. You two make such a hot couple. Like seriously, hot, like a couple of tamales. Where did she vanish off to?"

"Oh um, she had to take care of something."

"She didn't cut out early, did she?"

"No, um someone needed her help with something."

"You mean she needed to get Frankie out of here before she started up on me. I thought I saw her here, but I hoped I was wrong." Chloe was always way more observant than anyone gave her credit for.

"You two don't get along?"

"Oh no, it's not like we can't get along reasonably well at work and whatnot. I mean she tends to be a crankypants but she is a good detective. She just gets pretty mean when she's bored or drunk, which she would've been both here, not that I couldn't take it and dish it back, but Dov didn't want anyone here who wasn't going to be happy for us. I mean she can even out-Gail Gail, which is pretty impressive when it's not directed at you. Not that Gail isn't happy for us, you heard her speech, she just tends to keep it all bottled up inside."

"Umm, yeah."

"I mean, sure Frankie and Gail had had a thing, which is why Dov made her promise not to bring her tonight, but they're totally just friends now and it's much better that way. It's not like you have anything to worry about anyway."

"I wasn't..."

"Because Gail is kind of like a fire. She can be warm and bright, but dangerous, like you have to be careful around her so you don't get burned. When she dated Nick, he was kind of like a stick, she burned through him quickly, and he wasn't enough to keep her lit. Frankie is like gasoline, you put them together and..." Chloe gestured wildly with her hands, making the noise of an explosion, "...they can burn the whole place down and wreck everyone around them. But you, you're kind of like her oxygen, she needs you to keep her going but you don't let her get out of control. You know what I mean?"

The conversations with Gail's friends were starting to make Holly's head spin. Maybe she didn't need that champagne. "Ummm, I guess. Thank you, Chloe, I think."

Just as Chloe was about to continue her ramble of how good of a match (pun intended) Holly and Gail were she felt arms wrap around her waist. She smiled widely as she realized her _husband_ had come to join them. Holly noticed the change and felt a small twinge of envy looking at the happy couple. They were so comfortable wrapped up in each other's arms and it was almost nauseating how in love they were. Holly had never been one to really consider marriage or plan out her own wedding, it just wasn't something she was convinced was in the cards for her. But she missed having someone that she felt that intimate with that could put a goofy smile on her face without even trying, she hadn't felt that since...well she didn't want to acknowledge when the last time she felt that way was. Luckily, the groom pulled her from her thoughts.

"Hi, Dr. Stewart, glad you could make it. My _wife_ was really excited when she bumped into you yesterday." Dov really couldn't help that his smile grew even bigger every time he realized that he could finally call the redhead his wife.

"I was just telling Chloe how beautiful the ceremony was. Congratulations. I also understand I should be congratulating you on your promotion, Detective Epstein."

"Thanks! I just transferred to Intelligence now that Gail has taken over as the newbie. It's a shame I won't get the chance to boss her around." Dov let out a chuckle at the thought of being able to force Gail to get him coffee before continuing, "I still can't believe I beat her out on making the D's first, being a Peck and all. Sure shit hit the fan when it came to the Peck dynasty but it still couldn't hurt having that much clout when it comes to your name."

Holly frowned at Dov's implication that Gail would use her name to help her when it came to her job, even when they were just friends, Holly knew how hard Gail worked to get her friends to think of her as one of them and not a "white-shirt-wannabe" (her words). She also didn't quite understand what he meant in reference to the Peck family. She knew what Steve had been found guilty of but she wasn't really sure what that had meant for Gail or her parents. She also didn't really know how it had impacted the blonde, but she was aware of how much Gail had respected and trusted her brother, even if she never liked to admit it, so she could imagine it had taken a toll on her.

"I'll never understand why you two feel the need to compete about everything." Chloe chastised Dov. She knew that whenever you put "Peckstein" together it was like letting squabbling siblings fight over the remote, they just seemed to bring the competitive side out in one another.

"Hey, this is the same woman who once took credit for collaring a bad guy when we were rookies, after I chased him across an entire campus and made the takedown. I couldn't even argue because of my asthma."

"And clearly you haven't let it go. Anyway, you're not supposed to be badmouthing your groomsman to the good doctor." Chloe silently glared at Dov, hoping he would realize that he was supposed to be helping Gail get in good with Holly, not pointing out her flaws.

But their silent communication was still a work in progress. "Why not? She would be badmouthing me if she were here right now. Where is she anyway? Did she manage to make a break for it already?" Chloe elbowed Dov and he finally took the hint. "Ow. Oh right. Never mind what I said, Gail has changed a lot since then. Anyway Holly, have you been enjoying yourself?"

"Of course, it's been wonderful to see everyone again." Holly responded politely, she wasn't quite sure what was going on but the newlyweds were definitely a strange couple.

"And to dance with Gail." Chloe supplied. She was pleased her plan seemed to be working.

Holly blushed slightly at the observation.

"Ah, so you've been enjoying the music?" Dov had a smug grin on his face as he silently congratulated himself for stealing the playlist off of Gail's computer and supplying it to their friends to choose songs from. He deemed it reasonable, since he needed the practice with his technical skills for his new transfer, and Gail needed the help with her relationship skills, at least in his opinion. Plus, he figured the blonde wouldn't be able to kill him at his own wedding.

"It's ummm interesting?" The brunette wasn't sure where he was going with the question but the songs had been nice, even if a little odd for a wedding.

Dov opened his mouth to continue but was cut off by his wife, "Anyway, we're really glad you came Holly but I think my cousin is looking for us, so we should head over there, _Hubby_. I'm sure Gail will be back soon." With that, Chloe went to pull Dov away before he gave away too much of their "Operation."

Dov let himself get dragged away, grinning widely at the term of endearment, "Nice seeing you, doc!"

Holly watched the couple go and realized that she was more confused than ever.

* * *

"Alright Frankie, what are you doing here? You were supposed to be out with that nurse you're dating." Gail had waited to resume the questioning until they had gotten outside and Duncan had begrudgingly left to retrieve his car after being threatened by both Chris and Gail.

Chris stood off to the side, far enough away to give the women some privacy, but close enough to help if Gail needed it. He watched the interaction between the two warily, wanting to make sure Frankie left before anyone got hurt, but also wanting to ensure that Gail didn't bail now that she was outside. He had promised Dov to keep her here tonight "till a reasonable hour", which sounded like something Chloe had come up. But Dov had been adamant that his groomsman stay put and as best man Chris took the responsibility very seriously.

Traci came up beside the man standing guard. "So, how's it going?" she asked eyeballing the two detectives, who were in the middle of a conversation.

"Bout as well as could be expected. They haven't killed each other or Duncan yet, so that's a win...for him." Chris answered without taking his eyes off the other two.

Traci laughed and headed over to the women.

"What happened between you and the nurse? You actually seemed to like this one." Gail prompted.

"Nothing", Frankie let out an exasperated breath. If she wasn't drunk there was no way she would be talking about this, but she also knew Gail well enough to know her " _you're full of shit_ " face, and when she wasn't planning on dropping a subject. "She wanted us to get serious, I told her that things were good like they were. She didn't seem too happy about it but said she still wanted to see me, so I told her I would take her out tonight and she'd agreed. But when I got to the hospital, she was outside kissing some doctor. You know the one, the bitchy plastic surgeon who thinks she's better than us anytime she gets called in to sew one of us up because of the job. So I said fuck it, and headed to the Penny."

Gail realized that Frankie had been referring to the Botched Boob Job that had broken up her and Holly in the first place. Well, technically, that had been Gail and her refusal to talk to Holly, instead opting to make her emergency exit at the first opportunity she had. But Boob Job definitely hadn't helped matters talking all that shit to Holly when they had just met and Gail had only stepped away for a minute; she had voiced every fear that Gail had had about her relationship. Plus, Gail had already been skittish that day after talking to Dov. Still, it was pretty ironic that the Boob Job's awesomely bad timing had managed to interrupt her and Holly once again by inadvertently sending the torpedo, aka Detective _Drunk_ erson, their way.

Traci had joined them at this point and decided to call Frankie out, "You know, normally, you would just go to the bar and pick up some new woman. I think you really liked this one and maybe you should talk to her. Sounds like she was just trying to make you jealous."

"Thank you for the advice, Mom, but I didn't ask for it. Plus, I dodged a bullet, sure she made me laugh and the sex was great. But it's like all the others they get jealous or can't keep up then its broken hearts. Sure, I didn't mind the way she chewed her food but people aren't meant to be with one person forever. Some just aren't girlfriend or wife material. Look at Peck."

"Frankie, don't start," Traci warned, seeing the look in Gail's eyes, despite the blonde keeping her face neutral.

"What? It's true." But before she could elaborate and further risk Gail's wrath, Duncan showed up with the car.

"Alright, Gerald, take her home and no where else, no matter what she says. That's an order, and God help you if you disobey it. If you somehow survive choking on your own nuts, I will personally make your life a living hell if anything happens to her." Gail warned as Traci helped the inebriated detective into the passenger seat. Once secure, Duncan headed off before the blonde could make good on any of her threats.

"Well that was fun, let's not have to do that again. Ready to head back in?" Traci asked with a smile, hoping her friend would relax now that the crisis had been averted, but Gail stayed rooted to the spot staring out at where the cars were parked, regretting the fact that she had let Chris drive her.

Maybe Gail could head to the car and get her taser and just tase herself to get out of the rest of the night. Between the ceremony, the shock of seeing Holly, the public speaking, the prodding from her friends, the weird music that she was fairly certain they had something to do with, the intensity of dancing with Holly and having her in her arms again, the mess with Frankie and the familiarity of her parting words, Gail didn't have the energy to go back in and deal with any more of it. She just wanted to go home and curl up with a bottle of tequila and a package of cheese puffs.

Seeming to read her mind, Traci said cajolingly, "Come on Gail, the reception is barely half over, we still need to give Dov and Chloe their gift, and you have a very hot doctor waiting for you in there."

"Don't start Trace, I'm still pissed at you, and I don't know what all of you are up to but you really need to knock it off. Just leave me alone and stop meddling."

"Gail..." Traci started but Chris put a hand on her shoulder.

"Why don't you head in Trace? We'll be right behind you," Chris offered, trying to give Gail a minute to get settled.

"Gail, don't forget that everyone deserves to be happy, even you." Traci said before squeezing Chris' hand and heading back in.

Chris and Gail stood in silence for a minute before Chris started, "Frankie was wrong, you know."

"No, she wasn't, and I'm glad she reminded me before I made a fool of myself tonight."

Chris opened his mouth to protest.

"Don't Chris," Gail sighed heavily, "I have nothing to offer Holly."

"Gail what are you talking about? You're awesome when you're not being all cold and bitchy."

"Chris, I'm still pretty sure I'm a sociopath. I'm not worth anyone's time or energy, even my own family turned their back on me and they had barely tolerated me my whole life. I don't know who I am anymore, but I do know I am a screw-up. The only common denominator in all my failed relationships, romantic and otherwise, is me," Gail's self-loathing was coming out full-force, shocking her friend. He knew Gail was hard on herself but he wasn't used to her actually talking about it.

"Gail, you're an amazing person, and Holly would be lucky to have you."

"Seriously Chris, I know you like to see the good in everyone but there's no good here." Gail gestured to herself. "I'm not good enough for anyone to choose me. Nick chose the army, you chose Dov, Nick then chose McNally, McNally chose a fling with Nick over our friendship, Holly chose San Francisco, my parents chose Steve, and Laura-Lee chose a better family for Sophie. Even Traci was prepared to turn her back on me after the Steve thing. I'm done with it, all of it, I'm good alone, I really don't need anyone." She paused, and took a steadying breath, recollecting herself.

Chris frowned, "Holly may have chosen you, that might be why she's here."

"You don't know that."

"You don't know either, not till you talk to her."

"I...I can't." Gail whispered dejectedly. Chris didn't know what to do or how to help. If he kept pushing, Gail would rebel and lash out. He was lucky she had shown this much vulnerability. "Just please let it go, Chris, I know you're trying to make me feel better, but the only thing that will do that is making this night end already. Since that's apparently not an option without me having to physically hurt someone, let's head back in before Nicholas comes storming out here, guns blazing." Gail turned to trudge back to the castle, her feelings boiling just under her surface.

Chris released a disappointed sigh and followed the irritated blonde back in, hoping she didn't do anything she would regret.

* * *

Gail had just crossed the threshold to the banquet hall when she noticed Nick standing there expectantly.

"Easy does it warden, the prisoner has returned." Gail decided to make light of the situation.

"Where did you vanish off to?" Nick was ready to kick off the interrogation.

"What's wrong Casanova? Too busy eating your girlfriend's face for lunch, to keep track of your charge."

Nick just glared at Gail, "You're just lucky I saw Chris and Traci following behind you."

"Well, then thanks for the assistance, not like I couldn't have used someone from ETF to help me defuse the bomb I just dealt with."

Nick looked confused.

"Forget it soldier boy, I need a drink if I'm going to be stuck here the rest of the night." With that, Gail walked away, maybe she just needed some liquid courage. She saw Holly talking with Chloe but opted to head directly to the bar, which was safely located in the opposite direction.

* * *

Gail had just gotten herself a jack and coke when Oliver sidled up beside her, snatching her drink before it could reach her lips.

"So my Petulant Peck, what has you extra sulky at this fine occasion?"

"Well, it could be that I just had my well-deserved drink stolen from me."

"Stolen? Maybe you should call the police. Oh wait, we _are_ the police," Oliver chuckled at his own joke before adding, "Shouldn't you be enjoying the festivities with your girl?" He gestured to the brunette who's eyes seemed to find Gail every 30 seconds, even as she chatted politely with various guests.

"She's not my anything. I still don't even know what she's doing here. Did you know she would be here?"

"At the wedding? No."

"You sure?" Gail gestured to the DJ, who this time was playing the Rolling Stones. She had a feeling Oliver had something to do with that one.

"Great song, classic."

"Not the point."

"What is the point darlin'?"

"The point is..." Gail gestured wildly around her, "The point is that everyone seems to know what's going on, but me. You all seemed to have taken it upon yourselves to decide what's best for me."

"How do you figure?" Oliver was using his best fatherly tone.

"Well someone invited her here and it wasn't me. Chris and Nick have been assigned guard duty to ensure I stay put. Traci keeps nudging, and these damn songs are pissing me off." Gail ranted.

The last one had Oliver genuinely confused. Sure, Dov had asked him to pick a song, but he figured that was just because of his awesome musical taste. The songs at the wedding may have been unconventional but so was everyone else here, especially the newlyweds.

The music changed again and this time Gail was certain Dov had chosen the song just to get under her skin. "See!" She gestured violently towards the speakers. "Excuse me, I have to go kill the groom or at least make sure he can't enjoy his honeymoon."

Gail pushed away from the bar intent on finding her victim, but Oliver caught hold of her arm before she could get away, and steered her back to the bar. "Oh no you don't! You, my petulant detective, are going to stay here, have a drink with me, and tell me what's really bothering you." When Gail rolled her eyes, Oliver added, "That's an order."

"I think the white shirt is getting to your head. I'll stay, but you can't make me talk." Gail was being extra petulant.

"No, but as long as you're here, you might as well listen. Am I to assume that having the good doctor here is not a good thing? A happy thing? A cause for even more celebration than the nuptials of Epstein and Price? That rather than enjoy having the woman who has left you moping for..." Oliver dramatically looks at his watch," Approximately three years back, you would rather sit at the bar with your good pal Oliver and mope."

"I'm not moping, I'm drinking."

"For someone who I deem petulant on a regular day, you ma'am are taking your mope to a whole new level. If you want to know something why don't you just ask her? You won't get any answers if you keep asking the wrong people the wrong questions. You should know that, _detective_."

"What are the right questions?" Gail hoped the man she respected so much could give her at least a little insight and steer her in the right direction, just like he had when she was a rookie.

"Ah, that I do not know, only you do."

Gail frowned at that non-response. She had really been hoping for advice. So she voiced her other concern, "And if she doesn't have the right answers?"

"Do you even know what the right answers are?" Seeing the skeptical look on the blonde's face he simply continued, "Either you'll hear what you want and we can celebrate or you won't and you will finally, officially have the closure you need to move on and we will once again celebrate. Either way Peck, next week: you, me, and shopping."

"Weapons and shoes."

"Of course!"

Just then Celery came up, placing an arm around Oliver's shoulders, but addressing Gail. "You have a lot more to offer her than you think."

Gail looked at the witch with narrowed eyes, had she been listening outside? Probably not, she always just seemed to know things. When Celery handed Gail a weird looking charm the blonde simply cocked an immaculately groomed eyebrow.

"It means eternal love. It's something you can offer her. Trust me, it's enough" Celery stated simply with a smile on her face and kissed Oliver's cheek.

A part of Gail wanted to blow up on the woman, she was the umpteenth person to make assumptions without knowing her, but Oliver loved Celery and Gail loved Oliver. The other part of her hoped that the woman was right, but Gail wasn't ready to face that part of her psyche. Instead, she smiled and thanked Celery before tucking the charm away; it was something that could be dealt with later.

The pleasant moment was ruined by the music switching songs again. This one was by far the worst. _They're about as subtle as a sledgehammer to the face! Do they really think this is a good idea? If Oliver won't let me kill someone then I at least need air and space. Lots of space..._ Gail glanced around knowing that she wouldn't be able to make it to the exit with Nick and Chris on watch. She noticed a door near the bar that seemed to lead out to a balcony. She finished her drink and pushed off towards the door without any explanation.

Not that Oliver needed one; after all, he heard the song too. _Hmmm...Maybe Peck was right_.


	5. Chapter 5

Holly had started to head to the bar after she saw Gail return without Detective Anderson. However, she couldn't seem to make any progress before being stopped by some new stranger who wanted to discuss everything from dead bodies to bunions with the "Doctor". Holly had done her best to be polite, but the one person she wanted to speak to most was across the room, and her normally infinite level of patience was wearing thin. Her eyes keep flitting over to the despondent-looking blonde who was trying to get the bartender's attention. _Does she look so upset because of what just happened with the Detective? That she had to send her away? Did she want her here? She had looked at Chloe and you when she came in, maybe she's upset you're here instead? Why didn't her friends just tell her you had been invited? She seemed content when we were dancing. Well more than content, nervous but lustful? Ok, rein it in there Stewart; you might just be projecting that last one._ Holly knew it was probably impolite to stare at the woman while having a conversation with someone else but she couldn't help it, her eyes seemed to be acting of their own accord.

She noticed the Staff Sergeant steal Gail's drink and she could barely contain her amusement. She knew how much Gail loved and respected the man, but that was ballsy even for him. Holly tried to politely remove herself from the conversation with Chloe's Aunt Alda, who was proving to be even more of a chatterbox than her niece. By the time she was finally successful and could head to the bar the focus of her attention was nowhere to be found. However, the Staff Sergeant was still there and Holly had failed to speak with him the previous day, so she pasted a smile on her face and continued in his direction.

"Dr. Stewart! How are you darlin'? You look even lovelier than I remember." Oliver greeted the doctor genially.

"Thank you, Staff Sergeant. You look as dapper as ever."

"You remember Celery?"

"Of course, lovely to see you again." Holly responded politely.

"And you as well, my dear." Celery watched the doctor carefully, seeming to peer directly into her soul.

"So doc, can I take you being here as a good sign? Have you accepted?"

* * *

_5 days before the wedding..._

_"Dr. Stewart...Dr. Stewart...DR. STEWART?" Holly's assistant's perky voice finally penetrated her mind._

_"Yes, Becky, sorry how can I help you?"_

_"Are you ok? I was trying to get your attention for the last five minutes."_

_"Yes, everything is fine."_

_"Ok, well here is the information you asked for, for the grant proposal."_

_"Thank you. Oh, and Becky I'm going to need you to clear all my appointments for Friday."_

_After her assistant nodded and left, Holly returned to her thoughts about the intriguing phone call she had just received from her former boss, the Chief Medical Examiner in Toronto. When she first heard his voice, she had feared it was about her former cases. That the investigation following the bombing set off by Steve Peck was going to force Holly to defend her meticulous work. She had heard from Rodney that the lab was being investigated after the whole police force had been thrown into disarray._

_However, it seemed the chief had called to say that she had been recommended for an open position and wanted her to come back to discuss the details in person. To say Holly was shocked was a huge understatement; she hadn't applied for any positions and had no idea if she even wanted to go back. But she had agreed to at least hear him out, after he had praised her for all her accomplishments since leaving Canada. What could be the harm in going back for one conversation?_

* * *

"I thought I might have you to thank for the recommendation." Holly said with a smile. She didn't know why, but apparently, Oliver had recommended her for the open Assistant Chief position, the former had been brought up for corruption charges after being found to have tainted and destroyed evidence for the commissioner and the mob.

"No thanks necessary, Blake simply asked me if I knew anyone who could take over the job quickly and efficiently, and most importantly, could be trusted."

"How do you even know the chief?"

"Oh, we went to high school together and let me tell you, Blake sucks at gym class."

Holly laughed at the thought, "Well, thank you for thinking of me and speaking highly of me."

"Of course darlin'. We've missed you around here, some more than others." He gave the doctor a meaningful look, "So does this mean you're taking it?"

Holly sighed, "I don't know yet, there's a lot to consider. I know he's in a rush to fill the spot, but I asked him to at least give me the weekend to think about it." Holly knew she would need time to think about the offer. She was just about to complete a grant proposal to fund a new research project she was planning on working on in Boston. After a year in San Francisco, she had worked at John Hopkins pursuing another project, which she successfully completed and had only recently settled into Massachusetts. Each job had been professionally fulfilling and surprisingly fruitful but she was still seeking something more. She just didn't know what.

"It'll be worth it." Celery interjected. "It'll be difficult and a journey, but it will finally make you feel rooted."

"I'm sorry, not to seem rude, but we hardly know one another." Holly was flustered that the woman she barely knew seemed to think she had a right to weigh in on what was best for her.

"I'm _not_ talking about the job, my dear." With that Celery gestured to the door beside the bar, that Holly hadn't noticed before. Without further explanation, Oliver and Celery wished her luck and headed back to the dance floor.

Holly took a deep breath and reached for the door.

* * *

Once she had gotten outside and into the fresh air, Gail could feel herself relax slightly. She stood on a balcony overlooking the adjacent forest. She tried to focus on the darkness and quiet rustling of the trees rather than the dulled noise and lights from the party behind her. She especially wanted to think about anything but the embarrassment of the song that had just been playing. She braced herself on the railing and decided to do a mental rundown of the night.

 _So Peck, you got roped into not only attending a wedding, but to be a part of it. The woman who promised to be your plus one forever appeared. You managed multiple failed escape attempts. You were coerced into public speaking. Your so-called-friends have trapped you in a building where they are playing your Holly playlist for the entire party to hear. Oh yeah, and you were about to impulsively kiss the woman who abandoned you years ago because she complimented you. Smooth. Then you were pulled away by your drunken fling whom you promised wouldn't be here. Yep, you're still the Pale Fail you've always been and now you are apparently a chickenshit who is hiding out alone on a balcony._ Gail continued to grow more and more frustrated with the situation she found herself in. She finally had the woman of her dreams close enough to touch, and yet, she was trying her best to do everything but that. _What are you so scared of Peck? Oh you know, the usual: rejection, humiliation, complete and utter loss of hope. Then again, could you really manage to embarrass yourself more than your "friends" are managing to embarrass you? Hmm...with the doctor here maybe she can help you hide the bodies?_

Gail heard the door behind her open. Without turning around or allowing her focus to waver, she said, "How many bodies could you dispose of without getting caught?"

Holly would never understand how Gail could always do that: how she could always sense her presence and know it was her without looking. Anytime she asked, when they had been friends and when they had been dating, Gail would just point to herself and say "Peck" like that was explanation enough. Holly walked up behind the woman stopping just short of her body and placed her hands beside the pale ones gripping the banister. The extra height Holly had on Gail allowed her to comfortably stand behind the blonde, as close as humanly possible, but without touching.

"You look cold," Holly whispered in Gail's ear, smiling as she watched goosebumps that had nothing to do with the weather erupt across the smooth pale flesh.

"Dr. Stewart, how many bodies?" Gail's tone was steadfastly professional and she still refused to look anywhere but ahead of her. But, Holly noticed that Gail had seemed to pull ever so slightly away from her. _Guess, we're not picking up where we left off on the dance floor,_ Holly thought to herself, sighing before she pushed off the banister and turned to rest her lower back against it beside the blonde. She knew better than to make Gail feel trapped, and this vantage point allowed her to study the woman's face as she pondered the random question.

"Well, if you want to eliminate multiple people at a time, the easiest way would probably be to take out the whole room at once, assuming you're not trying to discriminate in your attack. Of course, being a groomsman and the only survivor, you would be the first suspect. Now, I could always eliminate all traces of evidence, so any case against you would be circumstantial at best..." Holly was in ramble mode. Gail thought about how adorable the doctor was like this, when she was trying to share as much of the inner workings of her incredible brain as quickly as possible. She smiled internally: _God, I missed this_.

"However, if you were particular about who you wanted to dispose of, I would say five bodies before the reception ends and too many people have left. That would even provide sufficient time to create enough reasonable doubt to ensure no one even suspected you." Holly completed her ramble and waited for the snarky response about talking too much she was sure would follow, seeing as how the woman hadn't interrupted her like she normally would. That was curious in and of itself.

Of course, Gail had wanted to interrupt the ramblings, but she had decided to let the doctor carry on, since she only knew one way to do so that worked 100% of the time. Damn, did she want to interrupt her like that, but the blonde knew it would inappropriate right now. Instead, she focused on the words the doctor had said. "Only survivor? What about you? I could always pin it on you"

"Hardly. I could always come up with a plausible alibi, especially since almost no one outside of this castle knows I'm here right now," Holly answered factually.

"Why are you here?" Gail had finally gathered the courage to ask the simple question.

But Holly knew the weight behind it being thrown her way, so she tried a minimalist approach with words, worried that if she started to ramble she would give too much away, "The bride invited me."

Gail frowned as she pondered this, piecing together a timeline, "The invitations were sent out months ago, why wouldn't they have told me? They would've had to work really hard to keep this one a secret and they suck at keeping secrets, well maybe not Chloe," Gail thought about how the woman managed to keep an entire marriage a secret, "But the rest of them..." Gail allowed herself to wonder aloud, hoping to get the brunette to fill in the blanks for her.

"She invited me yesterday." Holly was trying to keep her answers short and simple, clearly Gail was seeking information, but Holly wasn't sure if she should share it, it might change the results of tonight and bias the decision she had yet to make.

"Why would she invite someone the day before the wedding? Especially, someone who doesn't exactly live nearby anymore." Gail pondered aloud.

"We happened to bump into one another, quite literally, and she asked that I come. She used the bride card and it felt rude to not accept." Holly was never one to be rude if she could help it, unlike her conversational counterpart at the moment.

"Where?" The detective in Gail was out in full-force.

"At the precinct."

"Why were you at the precinct? Oh wait, was the courier sick? Did you need to drop off a thumb? Was there a report full of inconsistencies?" Gail had been joking, mentioning all the excuses Holly had used to see her at work, but the last one hit too close to home. Gail suddenly became anxious, "Wait, you're not here because of the bombing are you? I know the investigation into the corruption and mob infiltration is still ongoing, but they should have cleared all your cases by now. There is no way your work should have raised any flags, you are way too good at what you do." _Shit! Did Steve's actions make them question all of Holly's hard work? Did her relationship with me pull her into the crossfire? Fuck!_ Gail's mind was heading quickly into a downward spiral of doubt and loathing.

Holly saw the shift in Gail unfold before her eyes. The cocky, confident teasing gave way to panic that sent Gail into freak out mode wondering why she was in Canada. She probably thought that her brother's actions had tarnished Holly's work, or that their relationship had ruined her reputation. Neither of which would the blonde ever forgive herself for, that Holly was certain of. Sure, Holly had thought the same thing when she had first gotten the call and heard the voice of her former boss on the line, but she couldn't let Gail beat herself up for something that wasn't true.

"That's not why I was there, I promise. I had been looking for Oliver."

Gail calmed slightly, and let her body relax at the earnest tone of the doctor. She was still holding back, but at least Gail hadn't ruined her life, well at least it seemed that way for now. Before Gail could launch back into her questioning, the doctor decided to ask one of her own.

"Why the body disposal questions?"

Gail sighed, "I'm a very loyal person". This seemed like an odd start, but Holly was accustomed to Gail's way of talking around a subject before getting to the point. "I'm not a lot of things. I'm not really friendly, I'm not easygoing, I'm not really down-to-Earth, but I am very, very loyal. Loyal to my badge, to my division, to my _friends_ , to my..." She was about to say (ex-)girlfriend but stopped herself, "but _those people_ in there who claim to be my friends aren't loyal, at least not to me."

Holly turned around so that her stance mimicked Gail's with their hands almost touching. She looked out at the dark expanse of trees and water before her. She frowned as she thought about what Gail could possibly see as betrayal. Yes, Nick had made some boneheaded comments about Gail, but Chris had definitely had Gail's best interests at heart. Traci may have been a little pushy, but she hadn't revealed anything too personal. Chloe had invited Holly; maybe that was problem. Maybe Gail thought that Holly being there was a betrayal of some sorts, _I guess she really didn't want to see me here,_ the doctor sadly concluded _._

"They don't seem that bad." Holly mentioned quietly.

Gail didn't like the look that crossed Holly's face at her words. _Confusion? Disappointment? Hurt?_ Gail couldn't quite place it. "They conned me into public speaking, forced me into dancing, set Nicholas and Christopher up as my watchdogs...They even stole my music." Gail mumbled the last one but Holly heard it and it made her laugh. The brightness returning to her features.

"You know, I thought it sounded familiar. That last one seemed a little unambiguous." Holly nudged Gail with her shoulder, going right back into teasing mode.

Gail groaned, "I'm going to kill Dov. Plus, I'm sure they have a bet going right now on what we're doing out here and another one on how tonight turns out."

Hmm...that did kind of sound like them. Holly knew of 15 division's penchant for betting on the most random things. She had once witnessed them bet as to what color shirt the bartender at the Penny was going to be wearing on a particular night of the week. Though, it did seem rather crass to guess about other people's relationships or lack thereof. They wouldn't really do something like that would they?

* * *

Nick had watched Gail's movements closely, even as she ducked out the side door, but he knew that it wasn't an exit. Not unless Gail planned on scaling the walls in that dress and those heals. He wasn't too worried, that sounded a lot like exercise and Gail hated exercise.

If Juliet hadn't been so confident in her relationship with Nick, and known of Chloe's plan, she may have been a little concerned about his inability to take his eyes off of another woman. Of course, she had been recruited as well, and was actually helping her current boyfriend track the movements of his ex-girlfriend, and in turn, her ex-girlfriend.

"Should we intervene?" Juliet wondered if Gail would try to make another break for it.

Nick had already done his due diligence to account for all points of entry and exit when preparing for his mission before the unwitting groomsman appeared, "No, there's no way out over there."

"So they're alone and trapped. Maybe Chloe really is a genius." Juliet observed.

"Ha, ten bucks says Gail comes storming out ready to kill someone." Nick wagered.

"No way, my money is on Gail trying to hide there for the rest of the night, with or without Holly." Juliet countered.

Chris and Traci joined the other couple staring at the door in the side of the wall.

"Twenty says they're already hooking up as we speak and Gail comes out with that goofy look on her face." Chris tried to up the ante.

"I got fifty on the two of them avoiding any real talk and getting interrupted before they can actually tell each other anything. Then they'll continue to be awkward for the rest of the night until Gail tries to call it an early night." Traci figured she could always use her friends' cash to buy Leo something.

* * *

After discussing the likelihood of their fellow wedding guests making bets on them, Holly and Gail had fallen into a silence. They could hear the muffled music and chatter in the background but each woman was lost in her own thoughts as they stared out into the abyss. So far, Gail knew that Holly had only received a last minute invitation from the bride and had been looking for Oliver at the precinct. _Did she really agree to come just because she didn't want to be rude? She had to have assumed you would be here and she showed anyway. Maybe that's a good thing. But she still hasn't told you what she's doing back in Toronto and you have no idea when she's leaving again or what/who she's going back to..._.That last thought tugged at Gail's heart in a way that she hadn't felt since Holly told her she was seeing someone else when they "weren't talking".

Holly knew that she should just be honest with Gail. They told each other stuff right? Or at least they used to. They hadn't spoken in over three years and Holly only knew very little of what had been going on in Gail's life during that time. She had heard about Steve both through Rodney and Traci, but the latter had been very careful about never saying too much about Gail or her life. _What about Sophie, no one has mentioned her, and Chris and Gail still live together. She probably didn't adopt her._ It had been a long shot but it was still a shame since Holly knew Gail would make a great mother, even if it was something Holly hadn't been sure she could help Gail do at the time. Motherhood, like marriage, hadn't been a part of Holly's ten-year plan. No, that plan had been reserved for residency, fellowships, traveling, promotions, and generally being a workaholic. Then again, Gail hadn't really been a part of that plan either.

Finally, Gail broke the silence, she couldn't take not knowing what had been going on in the doctor's life or what brought her back home, well to Gail's home, she didn't really know where Holly considered home anymore, "Are you still in San Francisco?"

"No, actually, Boston. I only spent a year in San Francisco until I completed my research project, then I went to Johns Hopkins for awhile and completed another project there, before I was offered my current position."

Gail was surprised to find out Holly had made her way back east. The blonde mentally noted that Boston was a lot closer than San Francisco, but it still wasn't Toronto. "Very impressive, Dr. Stewart I bet you've been blowing American nerd brains away all over the place."

Holly laughed, "What can I say? It's a gift to be this mind-blowingly awesome."

"Trust me, I know, I deal with it on a daily basis." Gail cockily responded before continuing her barrage of questions, "So, when do you go back?" Gail may not have known why the Doctor was back in Canada but something about her being here now just felt right. She didn't want her to go, but maybe if she knew for sure the woman was leaving again after tonight the thought would be enough for her to control herself. Or, maybe it would make Gail lose all self-control, and she would decide that one night was worth it after all. Either way, she wanted to know.

"Tomorrow," Holly wrestled with telling Gail about the job offer, but whether or not she took it she would still need to head back tomorrow to deal with whatever loose ends there would be. So, technically, her answer was the truth. When Holly originally made the decision to leave Toronto she had done so on her own. She made her choice then impulsively asked Gail to drop everything and come with her. At the time, she foolishly thought her plan to start fresh could apply to them as a couple as well. This time, Holly wouldn't be starting fresh, sure it would be a different position, but she would be stepping back into a place where she didn't know if she belonged. That was the real reason she had accepted Chloe's invitation. Maybe it was a lot of pressure to put on just one night, but she had hoped she could at least get a feel for what she would be coming back to. It was an opportunity to see if three years had been long enough to change her, well, to change everything to the point of no return.

Gail simply nodded absorbing the information. She looked at the pensive doctor. The beautiful woman beside her was holding something back, Gail was certain of it. She couldn't figure out what it was, but she knew Holly well enough to know that she didn't want to share it. What she did know, though, was that tonight Holly was here with her, tonight she was close enough to hold her hand, to pull her into her and dance the night away, to kiss her like no one was watching, to take her home and to her bed, but tomorrow, tomorrow she would be gone again, just another dream to haunt her at night. In the meantime though, Gail realized that she wanted to know about Holly's life since she left. That was something that she always found weird, how she was actually interested in all things related to Holly, it had never been that way with anyone else in her life. "How do you like it there?"

Holly smiled; she was enjoying Massachusetts, just as much as she had Maryland and California. She had always loved to travel, so she enjoyed getting to explore each city and what it had to offer. She loved her research and each new project, but more importantly she liked the success she felt when she completed them, knowing that she had solved one more mystery and could share some new nugget of information with the world. But something still felt like it was missing. She knew that Boston was just another rest stop on her quest for something more, something she still couldn't put her finger on. "It's been a great experience. I like the city, it's reminds me more of Toronto than the other two. Busier, definitely colder. And I like the project I've been working on, it involves the decomposition rate of the musculoskeletal system when the body has been preserved using..."

Gail couldn't help zoning out as the doc went into geekspeak. She was too busy focusing on how animated the doctor became as she threw one ginormous word after another out at her. It was obvious how much the woman enjoyed what she was doing and learning and sharing with others. She didn't want to ruin the moment but she couldn't help the next thing that came out of her mouth, "So, it was worth it." It wasn't a question, not really.

That effectively shut the doctor up. Holly knew what Gail was saying, that leaving Canada and leaving her was worth all that she had done in the meantime. That each thing she accomplished professionally made up for the personal choice she had made for the both of them. It didn't feel like an accusation, just a sad realization. She sighed and reached for Gail's hand before opening her mouth to speak, "Gail, I -"

Holly didn't get the chance to finish that thought before she was interrupted by the untimely entrance of a giggling McSwarek (well McNally was giggling, Swarek was incapable of the action), as they stumbled through the entryway to the balcony, ruining the bubble the two women had created.

"Oh, sorry, we didn't realize anyone would be out here," Andy immediately apologized. _Crap, Chloe is going to kill me for messing this moment up._ "We should head back in."

"No, it's ok, you guys stay. I need to get back in there, see if Dov or Chris need my help with anything." Gail decided to use the break in the tension to get out of there before she said anything else. It was all getting to be too much for her, she felt like she was drowning in her feelings when she was around Holly, and one thing Gail Peck still wasn't good with, was handling her feelings. So, she exited as quickly as possible.

* * *

Holly sighed as she watched the blonde practically sprint away from her once again. It reminded her of the night in the bar when she abandoned her without so much as a glance back. That night, she didn't let Holly explain, and for whatever reason, Holly didn't chase after her. This time around Holly still hadn't learned from their mistakes, so Holly did the same thing again, she wasn't about to chase the skiddish cat through a party room filled with her friends and make a scene, instead she leaned back against the rails and accepted defeat.

"Hey don't worry about Gail, she's happy you're here she just doesn't know how to show it." Andy tried to offer helpfully.

Holly knew that wasn't entirely true, Gail could be mercurial, but Holly had almost always known how to read her moods. She had seen Gail happy; in fact, she used to be someone who could make Gail happy. She wouldn't describe the blonde as happy tonight, _flabbergasted, stunned, frustrated, pissed off,_ were all moods that she had seen on Gail tonight but happy really wasn't one of them, at least not towards her.

"So what brings you back to town Doc? Business or Leisure?" Swarek tried to change the subject.

"Ummm business but I figured I could use the time to visit some of my friends and family too." Holly responded politely. "I hear Congratulations are in order for you two. How far along are you?" Even if Traci hadn't confirmed it, Holly could tell that Andy was at least four months along. She didn't really show it but Holly was a trained medical professional, even if her patients were usually deceased.

"Thanks! Almost five months, the morning sickness finally ended thank god!" Andy gushed while Swarek looked extremely proud of himself for knocking up his wife.

Holly continued to make idle chitchat with the couple till she finally excused herself and headed back into the party. Maybe it was time she called it a night and headed back to her hotel room. Nothing was turning out like she had hoped.

* * *

Gail crossed back into the party and was pissed. She was pissed at McSwarek for interrupting, she was pissed at the traitors for pushing her, and she was pissed at herself for hoping that maybe Holly had come back for her. _That had been stupid Peck; you were just setting yourself up to get hurt_. She immediately spotted Traci collecting money from Chris, Juliet, and Nick. "Having fun?" She questioned as she stormed up to the group ready to rip them apart.

Juliet and Nick quickly took off in the direction of the bride and groom before they could fall victim to the blonde's bloodthirsty mood.

"Chickens!" Chris called out after them.

"So, did you guys actually talk before you got interrupted or just stand around in silence?" Traci knew her friend well enough to know that either was a legitimate possibility.

"I'm glad to see someone is profiting from tonight. I hope you're at least going to use the money to buy Leo a new video game that I can whoop his butt in." If deflection was an art, Gail was a regular Van Gogh tonight.

"And reward you for your bad behavior? No way."

"My bad behavior? What do you call everything all of you have been doing?" Gail tried to turn the tables.

"Looking out for our friend's best interests." Chris offered.

"Ha, more like trying to play games with someone else's life, but I'm over it. Hand over the keys Christopher, I'm heading home."

"C'mon Gail, don't be like that. The night isn't over yet and we still haven't given Chloe and Dov their gift. You're the groomsman, so you can't bail before then. Don't you want to see their reactions?" Chris tried his best coaxing tone and smile.

"No." Gail was resolute.

"Well if you stay until then, I promise I'll take you home after." Chris always knew when to throw in the towel when it came to his roommate.

"Fine, gather up the troops and let's get this shitshow on the road."

Traci laughed at the blonde's acerbity, "You're enthusiasm is palpable, Peck. Careful there, or you might hurt yourself."

"Trust me, Traci, there are many people I want to hurt tonight, myself is not one of them."

"Well, it looks like you're doing a pretty good job of it already." Traci noticed the desolate look cross her friend's face when Holly rejoined the party from the balcony.

"You're not going to give it a rest are you?" Gail was beyond tired and cranky at this point. She wasn't sure if she had it in her to go another round against Traci's _good intentions_.

"Why? So I can watch you continue to let the one thing you really want slip away from you, again."

"I've wanted a lot of things Trace, that doesn't mean I can have them. Sometimes things just don't work out, you know this!" The bitterness in Gail's tone should have been enough to silence her friend, but Traci wasn't one to put up with Gail's shit.

"Maybe not, but it could this time, if you just stopped fighting it."

Gail had learned to stop fighting. She had learned to let go of the things she wanted in the best interests of the people she loved. She had dropped her intent to adopt Sophie when a better family came around. She had let Holly leave in pursuit of her dreams. Sure, Gail had recently fought for the detective position that she had finally felt she earned, even as others, her "family" included, had tried to spike her promotion because of what happened with Steve. But when it came to her personal life, Gail just didn't think she had any fight left in her, she just wasn't meant to be happy.

"What is there to fight Trace? She leaves tomorrow, to go back to a life she clearly loves. I'll still be here hanging out with you losers."

Traci opened her mouth to argue more, wanting to point out that one of the things she thought Holly might love was the caustic blonde in front of her for unfathomable reasons, but she was stopped by Chris' hand on her forearm and his voice in her ear.

"Let it go, Trace, if Holly is just going to leave, then maybe it's better if Gail just lets her." He whispered, keeping his voice low enough that Gail couldn't hear him. Not that Gail was paying attention, she was too busy stealing glances when Holly wasn't looking, and looking morose.

"Alright, Gail, you win, I'll go get everyone together." Chris offered.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can't express my gratitude to everyone who reads, comments, or drops a kudo for my stories. So this chapter was originally extremely long and I decided to split it, which I wasn't crazy about but thought it was necessary. Just as a heads up this chapter is shorter than the next one as we say good-bye to the wedding and some of its guests. Let me know what you all think...

It took a while for the members of 15 Division, former and current, to gather together with the bride and groom. Once everyone was together, Chris handed the couple an envelope, "So we know that you guys have been saving your money, but we thought you might enjoy this."

The newlywed couple had been working hard to not only afford the wedding they wanted, but also to get their dream house. Luckily, Chloe was obsessed with antiques and wanted a house with a story, which meant looking at old houses in need of restoration. Dov on the other hand was practical, so he made sure whatever house they bought could be renovated without breaking their budget or collapsing on their heads. Still, even with the promotion to detective it had been a tight squeeze, to the point that the couple had to forgo a honeymoon. They figured that with Dov's recent transfer and everything still needing to get settled they could just push it off till a wedding anniversary or something.

Dov reached for the envelope and handed it to his wife, yep _wife_ , he still wasn't used to that, before wrapping her in his arms and looking over her shoulder.

Chloe was practically buzzing with excitement at the surprise gift from all of their friends. She opened the envelope and her doe-eyes grew two sizes. "ARUBA!" The bride shouted, as her husband's jaw dropped open. She gently closed it for him before addressing the group. "What? How? You shouldn't have."

"Don't worry darlin' we all chipped in." Oliver explained with a smile, while winking at Gail good-naturedly. It had been her idea to have everyone put in for the resort and the plane tickets. She had even called in a few favors to get a good deal and had paid to upgrade the plane tickets herself, but she had demanded that her part in it remain a secret. She had a reputation to protect and if the couple knew what she had done, they would be even more insufferable than usual. Although, after everything they had been up to that night she was kind of regretting her generosity.

Dov looked at the gift, "Wait, these are first class tickets! Seriously, you guys, this is too much." He was overwhelmed at the generosity of his friends.

"Just count your blessings Epstein, including getting to take my lovely goddaughter to a tropical island!" Frank ordered the younger man.

"Of course, sir. But what about my spot in Intelligence?" That was where Frank had moved after being pulled from 15. With Dov's transfer having only been approved the previous week, he was worried about missing work.

"You don't leave till next Friday Epstein, and Peck here has graciously offered to fill in for the week."

Dov looked suspiciously at his groomsman, "You're not trying to steal my job are you?"

"Hardly, I'm still low woman on the totem pole, I just go where I'm needed." Gail waved him off, "Plus if I really wanted to steal your job I wouldn't need to send you to Aruba, it would be easier than stealing music off someone's computer." Dov blanched at the last comment. _Busted!_

Before Gail could continue to poke fun at her friend's expense she was pulled into a bone-crushing hug by the bride, "Awww Gail, I knew you were a big softie."

"Hardly," Gail gasped, barely able to breathe from the tight embrace, "You know, Price, this still isn't how I communicate."

"Umm... Chloe, sweetheart, love of my life... you might want to let go before her fangs come out," Dov warned his wife, whom he really wanted to survive the night and the next fifty years of marriage, neither of which seemed likely if she continued to poke the bear.

Chloe finally let Gail go and immediately launched herself to the next person, making her way around to give the whole group hugs. Dov amiably punched Gail in the arm. "Best groomsman ever."

"Obviously..." Gail rolled her eyes but punched him back, slightly harder. "Congrats Groom!"

The group continued to idly chitchat, but Gail was over it. She hated having to make small talk to begin with but being stuck with a group of people who had been trying to manipulate her life all night was beginning to remind her a bit too much of growing up Peck and she could feel the tenseness gathering in her muscles. There was a good chance that finally having all of the conspirators together within reach, she might actually test out Holly's body-hiding abilities. The thoughts were tempting. After what seemed like an eternity to Gail, she finally turned to Chris, "Okay, a deal is a deal, keys please!" She held out her hand and wiggled her fingers, expecting the man to deposit the keys to his truck.

"You sure you don't want to stay?" Chris figured it couldn't hurt to ask, he wasn't ready to leave yet, but he had made a promise. Then again, he had also promised Dov to keep Gail there that night but at the time he hadn't known why or the lengths the others were willing to go to get Holly and Gail back together. Not that he didn't like Holly, he was just extremely protective of his best friend/ex-girlfriend/roommate. She was like a sister to him and he really couldn't stand seeing her get hurt...again.

Gail gave him her best " _you have to be shitting me_ " face at the question, "Don't make me search you Christopher, I promise you won't like it."

"Alright, alright! I'll take you home," Chris acquiesced, producing his car keys but still keeping them out of reach of the blonde. Despite everyone at 15 treating his car like a communal piece of property, he still preferred to drive if he was in it.

"No, you won't, you'll hand over your keys, and then you'll stay and catch a ride with Traci." Gail explained her logic and made a grab for the keys, damn Chris was tall. Gail thought to herself: _This is how a proper wingman was supposed to act:_ _helpful_ _. The others should take notes._

"Gail!" Chris immediately blushed at the mention of the other woman.

"Right Trace?" Gail raised her voice, "You won't leave poor Christopher stranded here all night will you?"

Traci rolled her eyes at her friend's antics, "I guess payback is a _bitch,_ " she said as she pointedly glared at the blonde, who simply glared back. "Of course I'll drive you, Chris. Though I still don't think you should reward her behavior."

With that settled, Chris handed over his keys.

"Alright Price, call off your minions. I've put in more than my fair share of dues. I'm heading out." Gail knew who the ringleader was and she wanted to leave with as little fuss as possible. That meant Chloe calling off whatever plan she had set into motion. With the bride being in charge, no one was going to give it a rest without her approval.

Dov was ready to object; he knew how hard his wife ( _yep, there was the goofy grin just from thinking about the word_ ) had worked to get Gail and Holly together that night. If Gail left now, alone, it all would have been for nothing. But Chloe seemed blasé about the other woman's departure. She simply kissed her husband on the cheek to silence him, while studying the cranky blonde.

She must have seen something in the other woman's face or body language that told her whatever it was she needed to know. "Of course Gail, thanks for everything you did tonight..." She smiled one of her thousand-watt smiles, she really did appreciate how relatively complaisant the normally irascible woman had been that night. "And for setting up the honeymoon."

How Chloe Price wasn't a detective yet was beyond Gail's comprehension. She might be an annoying chatterbox, but the woman had great instincts, there really was no denying that. "I didn't." And if anyone asked, Gail would refute it till her dying day.

She addressed the group, being sure to stay out of hugging reach, "Alright losers, I'm out!" And with that Gail finally managed to exit the banquet hall without a look back.

* * *

"What the hell Chloe? All your big _Golly_ plans and you just let her go?" Andy immediately questioned the bride, once the blonde was out of earshot. She knew better than to be the one to risk Gail's wrath, having been on the receiving end of it enough times. But she couldn't understand why the woman had made such a big deal about setting the two other women up if she was just going to let Gail walk away before they had reconciled.

"Relax, fifty bucks says Gail is waiting in the parking lot." Chloe was confident that Gail would be waiting to offer Holly a ride home. If her calculations were correct, the doctor would be looking to make an exit of her own in the next ten minutes.

"I don't know Chloe, I think we might have pushed her a little too far tonight." Traci had her doubts. She knew how stubborn her friend could be. Regardless of her feelings for the doctor, she loved to drag her heels and she hated people interfering in her life, so everything the group had done that night may have ruined whatever chance the couple actually had of working things out on their own. She was honestly worried that making Gail feel cornered had caused her to act out. Judging by the looks on both the detective and doctor's faces when they had rejoined the party, the night was not going well.

But Chloe remained unconcerned, she had a feeling and her instincts had rarely steered her wrong (well, not including Wes). "Nonsense, you know Gail never would've put up with all the stunts if she hadn't wanted to be here with her."

"The bride has a point," Nick chimed in, as he pulled Juliet into his side. He pointed out how uncharacteristically his ex had acted, "She didn't put up much of a fight when I told her she had to stay tonight."

"Yeah, she didn't even make a run for it when Frankie..." Chris trailed off, realizing his slip-up when he saw the look that crossed Dov's face.

"Wait! Frankie was here but Gail promised." The groom whined angrily, sounding more like Leo than the grown-up he was supposed to be.

"And she kept her promise, it was Duncan who brought her here and Gail was the one that got her out." Chris spoke up quickly to mollify him.

Dov accepted that Gail really had kept her word, "Told you we shouldn't have invited him. He had a crush on you that he kept talking to me about in weird ways when we were broken up." He muttered grumpily to his new wife.

Chloe just laughed at his frustration, "I know, but of course I only wanted you, Dov Epstein, even when you're being a stubborn pain in the ass." She gave him a brief kiss on the lips, finally wiping away the pout from the grown man's face.

After most of the couples from 15 drifted off to return to dancing and drinking, Traci turned back to the newlyweds, "Looks like you were right, Price."

Sure enough, Holly Stewart was making her way over towards the couple of honor.

* * *

Holly had watched the group of cops from 15 Division circle around the bride and groom, while she had found herself trapped in a conversation about piri-piri with one of Chloe's relatives. She really had no idea how she kept getting into these situations. While feigning interest in the conversation, the doctor allowed her eyes to wonder and she couldn't help but notice that Gail stood a step back from the group. She was also the only one who wasn't coupled up. Technically, Chris and Traci were single too, but Holly had a feeling that wouldn't be the case for long if they kept looking at each other like they were. Something about the blonde being there on her own bothered the doctor, but she refrained from joining the group. It just wasn't her place.

She had barely suppressed her laugh when she saw the petite redhead nearly tackle the blonde to the ground in some fit of joy. What wiped the smile off her face though, was when she saw Chris deposit keys in Gail's outstretched hand. Next thing she knew, the blonde had left without so much as a glance over her shoulder. Resigned to the fact that the night, as far as she was concerned, was over Holly decided to wait till the officers had dispersed a bit, so she could give her farewell to the bride and groom and head back to her hotel room, alone, where a decision still awaited her.

* * *

_2 hours before the wedding..._

_Holly returned to her hotel room and let out a long sigh as she leaned against the door. It had been a long 36 hours, to say the least. After meeting with the Chief and getting invited to the wedding, she had left the precinct without seeing the Staff Sergeant. Instead, she had called up Lisa and Rachel, who were both in town and asked them to get drinks. When she told them about the position they both questioned if it was really what she wanted. Lisa had no qualms telling Holly that she shouldn't come back to Canada for some "beat cop" who was probably over her anyway, which had only infuriated the normally good-natured doctor and fueled her to drink a bit more than she had intended. Rachel had been more understanding that the position had been something Holly had wanted before she left, but she too had warned Holly about factoring Gail into her plans, no matter how adamant the pathologist was that she was doing no such thing. She maintained that she was making a decision the same way she always did, logically and goal-minded. However, based on their reactions, she wisely decided not to mention the wedding invitation to either of her best friends, knowing that it would only confirm to them that she had returned home to chase after her ex, something the Holly Stewart they knew and loved would never do._

_If that reunion wasn't enough, Holly had spent the morning and afternoon at her sister's house in Toronto running around with her nieces. The Stewart girls had all been excited at the prospect of their favorite Aunt returning to the city. This time, Holly had at least been able to get through an entire discussion about the job and the pros and cons of it, before Gail was mentioned. Her sister hadn't been as dismissive as her friends, but she too had cautioned Holly about protecting her heart, in a way only a sister could. Gail had hurt her once before, so it was likely she would do it again. Even if she didn't do it purposefully, she was still a cop, which meant she put her life at risk day in and day out. Was that really something Holly could handle? Her sister had raised valid points but they weren't what Holly wanted to hear, as she explained, for what felt like the millionth time, that this decision had absolutely nothing to do with her ex. She appreciated the concern but it had been exhausting and she had returned to her hotel later than she intended._

_She walked over to the desk and flicked on the light on top of it. This was how Holly Stewart made a decision, with all the facts laid out before her so she could literally see how they stacked up against one another. She stared downs at the two pieces of paper that she had placed there before leaving that morning to meet her family. The sheets sat side-by-side and they both required a signature. One had been drafted over the course of the last month, the other over the course of the last 24 hours. The one was meticulously crafted, the result of years of hard work and many all-nighters, the other was written in haste and the result of only one sleepless night. One was a beginning and the other an ending. She had to pick one, but which?_

* * *

She probably shouldn't have been as surprised or as disappointed as she was with how the night had turned out, everyone had warned Holly. Maybe she had expected too much from one night. What had she even been expecting anyway? A passionate embrace, a declaration of feelings, a showering of affection? She knew how Gail had felt about surprises, so her reaction to seeing her ex show up announced to the wedding of her friends and co-workers was to be expected. Still, Holly couldn't deny the aching she felt from being that close to the blonde and not being able to just kiss her and tell her everything about the job, about how much she missed her, and how much she still wanted her. Watching the woman she still lov-cared for walk away once again was something Holly would never get used to. Maybe it was best that she just go back to the life she was living and put this weekend behind her.

Holly let out a long sigh and gathered up her stuff before walking over. "So I think it's time I called it a night. Congratulations you two!" She returned the warm hug she received from the bride and groom.

"We're glad you could make it Dr. Stewart, and if you're going to be around we still do Trivia Nights at the Penny." Dov offered, there was a reason Gail called him king of the dorks after all. He always liked a challenge and beating a doctor was something he just couldn't pass up. But he also wanted the woman to know that she was more than welcome to join their group if she was back in town, it would always give them more chances to help her get back together with Gail.

"Thanks for the offer, but I head back tomorrow, this was only a short visit. It was nice seeing all of you again." Holly declined politely; it was nice that they wanted to include her but she wasn't sure if she would ever be taking them up on it even if she took the job in Toronto. These were Gail's friends, no matter how much the blonde protested, and Gail wasn't her...well, she wasn't her anything at the moment.

Chloe frowned; she could have sworn the doctor had been back for something more than just a weekend. She hoped she had been right about Gail not really leaving, she didn't want two people who were still clearly in love to just let the opportunity pass. Love was hard and messy, something she had taught Dov, but so worth it. "Don't be a stranger, Holly, it was nice having you back. I'm really glad I bumped into you, although maybe next time you should try to stay standing up." Holly laughed at the suggestion, and the serious look on Chloe's face. "Seriously though, we miss you around here, especially Gail."

"Chloe!" Traci hissed, she knew Gail wouldn't appreciate Chloe speaking for her. She might have been the bride but it was definitely a good thing that the blonde had already left or they might not have been able to stop her from destroying the redhead.

"What? We all know it's true, even if she won't say it out loud, it's written all over her face. Ok, well, maybe not all over face because Gail has that whole stoic, resting bitchface thing down pat. But it's in her eyes." Chloe continued her ramble undeterred by the warning look on the detective sergeant's face.

Holly shifted nervously beside the two women; she tried to stop the smile from wavering on her face as she adjusted her glasses out of habit. "Ah, I appreciate the sentiment Chloe, but I think Gail can speak for herself. Anyway, I should really get going."

"Hey, call or text me when you get back just so I know you're safe. And next time give a girl a little warning you're back." Traci said before pulling the doctor in for a hug as well. She lowered her voice, "I know it might not seem like it but Gail has changed a lot over the years. You changed her." Then she let the doctor go.

"I promise I'll let you know when I get back. We'll talk soon." Despite the cryptic message, Holly thought it was best to just head out before things got any more complicated.

* * *

As Holly made her way outside, she looked for her cell phone, knowing she would need to call for a ride back. She probably should have done it before coming outside, but it was a nice night and she needed a break from the overwhelming feelings the wedding and reception had stirred. But the sight in front of her made her stop in her tracks and she was sure her heart had had a premature ventricular contraction: waiting by the door was a blonde bombshell leaning casually up against a truck, and she was waiting for her.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok so this chapter was technically the rest of the previous chapter, but as I mentioned before the chapter had been way too long so I split it up. Thank you to everyone reading, kudo-ing, and leaving comments they make my day :)

"Took you long enough." Gail called out as she pushed off from the truck. Yep, the cantankerous blonde had waited for the doctor. A part of her had contemplated leaving, not wanting Chloe Price and her stooges to think they had actually been right all along or that their actions had been justified. But despite everything that had happened that night, every overwhelming feeling, all the smothering from her ignorant "friends", she still wanted to spend some time with the other woman. She just wanted to do it on her own terms and not because of the machinations of people who clearly didn't know her well enough to know when they were overstepping their boundaries. She wasn't entirely sure the cops of 15 knew what boundaries were. "Need a lift?"

Holly was shocked, she had been certain that Gail had left without so much as a good-bye and that it might have been the last time she would see the blonde. Yet, here she was surprising her, once again. Holly smiled her crooked smile before teasing, "Thought you were gone. You know, Cinderella at least left a shoe behind as a clue."

"Well I'm no princess and you know how much I treasure my shoes, I could never leave just one behind." Gail made a face at the horror of such a suggestion before continuing her snark, "Not to mention glass slippers are stupid, they're impractical for running away."

"Oh, but five inch heals aren't?" Holly looked pointedly at the objects in question.

"Hell no! I can kick some serious ass in these." If there was one thing Gail could handle, it was her shoes (feelings: no, shoes: yes). "So, you going to hurry up before this thing turns back into a pumpkin, or what?"

"I might have been more inclined to hurry if I had known what was waiting for me." Holly sauntered over to the passenger side of the car. As excited as she was that Gail hadn't left yet, she didn't want her to feel obligated to drive her, plus she wasn't entirely sure being in such a small space together was the best idea. She looked seriously at the blonde, "You know you don't have to give me a ride? I'm a big girl, I can call a cab."

Gail frowned, she still hated taxis and she really didn't want Holly taking one if she could give her a ride, but she tried to squash the rising fear in her chest that those thoughts stirred in her. She focused on opening the passenger side door, "Where's the fun in that?" She winked at the doctor as she climbed in.

* * *

Once they had both gotten into the car and Gail started the engine, the stereo immediately turned on to a Janis Joplin song. Gail angrily punched the dashboard to quiet the heartbroken crooning that had erupted. "I'm music'd out." She grunted unapologetically for her abrupt action.

Holly chuckled at the blonde's irrational reaction to the inanimate object. She couldn't really blame her, not after finding out the weird music of the night had belonged to the woman beside her. Music that she couldn't help but notice applied to them specifically. But she kept her opinion on that to herself, the other woman was clearly bitter about the situation.

They drove in silence back towards the heart of the city. Gail didn't bother to ask where Holly was staying. She knew her way around the city and its adjacent areas like the back of her hand, thanks to her family's constant tests. And she assumed that the doctor would be staying with someone she knew, so she headed in their general direction waiting for the doctor to point out where to go. This time the silence wasn't as uncomfortable as it had been on the balcony, there something about being together, away from all the nonsense that was putting the women slightly more at ease. But each woman was still lost in her own thoughts, neither really knowing what to say. For the first time that night, it was just the two of them with no one around to pry or interrupt.

Holly knew she should probably be talking right now, telling Gail about why she was in Toronto, why she had agreed to go to the wedding, maybe mention how good it was to see her again. Most people who met Holly Stewart thought that she was open and friendly, a stark contrast to the prickly blonde driving them back. She was kind and patient, the kind of person who made others feel safe to spill their guts to without judgment. Yes, she was sassy but she wasn't mean. What most people didn't see was how guarded she was when it came to her own feelings. She could easily articulate every random fact about science, medicine, or general knowledge on the planet, but sharing her feelings was something she just wasn't equipped to do. It had been that way in all her relationships, even with Gail. When she kissed her in the coat closet, she had called her insane and then promptly ran away, without any explanation. When she pulled her into the interrogation room she had rambled about the cop putting herself in danger and about the stupid set-up, but she didn't actually say how she was feeling to other woman, instead she let Gail make the first move and kiss her silent. Even after Gail gave her that heartfelt speech about being the most wonderful person she had ever met, she simply said "Good night Gail." And when she wanted her back she kissed her passionately in the interrogation room rather than talking.

But this is how she's always been. It was also why her friends hadn't realized how serious she was about Gail when they met. Holly kept her thoughts to herself. Even when Lisa had been out of line, she simply downplayed the situation, letting her friends think that Holly had settled into another fun, easy relationship that would fizzle out on its own. That was another trend of Holly's, to commit to easy relationships that required little to no work. She didn't have the time or energy for the drama that came with serious relationships when she was busy enough with her career. That was, until Gail Peck came into her life. Gail was fun but in no way was she easy or carefree. The woman was complicated and demanding, and she could turn Holly's world upside down without saying a thing. So far the only person the doctor had actually seen a future with had been Gail, which had prompted her impetuous decision to ask her to drop everything and come to California. _Yeah, and look how well that worked out for you._

Now here she was with another job offer, one that would bring her back to Toronto and back into Gail's orbit, potentially permanently. If she told Gail about the job and Gail told her to take it would she? If she did and she hated the job she might resent Gail for making her feel pressured into accepting it for the sake of their relationship (not that they were guaranteed to get back together anyway). If she decided not to take the job there would be no chance of reconciliation, they had both decided long-distance wasn't an option for them and Gail had been adamant about Pecks living and dying in Toronto. Then, there was the fact that she actually enjoyed her work in Boston, or rather the potential of her work in Boston. But could she really return to that life knowing the possibilities she could be giving up? _What even were the possibilities Stewart? You have no idea how Gail feels about you or what she wants out of tonight?_ _If you bring any of this up right now, you're definitely going to send her up a tree and there's a good chance you'll never get her back down._ So Holly decided to bite her tongue for just a little while longer, and instead she simply tried to enjoy being able to soak in the blonde's presence, trying her best to commit the feeling to memory.

For the most part Gail kept her eyes trained on the road, but she couldn't help glancing over at the distractingly beautiful creature seated beside her. If this had been a drive like the ones in the past, Gail's hand would have sat casually on the doctor's thigh keeping them connected despite the console between them as they headed back to Holly's place in eager anticipation of the rest of the night, preferably spent together in Holly's bed (though her couch and kitchen had been fair game). But things had changed, Holly no longer lived in Toronto, tonight had not been a date, there was no expectation of things to come and Gail's hands stayed firmly on the wheel. She knew she should speak now that they were alone and she finally had the other woman's undivided attention. She wanted to tell Holly how glad she was that she showed up, even if it had been surprising as hell. She wanted to spill about how much she missed her, how difficult the last few years had been, how good it felt for her to be back even temporarily, but Gail still struggled to express herself without it dripping in sarcasm, so she kept her mouth shut. With each passing building and street sign, Gail could feel the rising dread at having to say good-bye once again to her person. She needed to say something, anything.

"Pizza." Gail blurted out, her voice breaking the silence and drawing the doctor from her own contemplations.

Holly glanced over curiously at the blonde, a little surprised at the sudden outburst. She had a feeling this was the blonde's way of indicating that she was hungry and wanted pizza but she had always enjoyed forcing the woman to use her words, "Pizza?"

While this is where most people would have simply asked if the other person had wanted to get pizza with them, Gail was not most people. "Yeah, you know one of the basic food groups."

Holly chuckled at the ridiculousness of the statement, not really sure where this conversation was going or why they were talking about pizza. Still, sassing the blonde was second nature to the doctor, "Gail, pizza is not one of the basic food groups. It is composed of ingredients from most of the food groups, but it is not itself a food group."

"Sure it is, it's on that pyramid thing right above cheese puffs but below coffee and donuts. Jeeze, I thought you were a doctor." The light in front of them turned red and Gail took the opportunity to look over when she stopped. She gave the brunette a very hard, accusing look before questioning her credentials, "You are a doctor right?"

Holly just rolled her eyes, "Very funny, you know you're the only person who follows that particular pyramid."

"False, I can name at least three other people who would agree with me." She knew she could, hell the guys usually ate worse than her no matter what they said. "Come on, I'm starving, so pizza?"

"Ha, you're always starving." Despite years of medical training, Holly was still convinced the blonde's metabolism was an impossible act of nature. Her stomach was an insatiable pit. It was nice to know some things hadn't changed.

"That wouldn't be the case if I had some pizza." Gail continued to finagle. She knew that she could easily grab food after dropping off the doctor, but that wasn't what she wanted. It might be stupid, but she wanted the chance to spend whatever time she could with her. So she offered again in her Gail-like way, "What do you say doc? Feed me?"

The blonde was being oddly persistent about grabbing food, something she could easily do without her. It was getting late and Holly still had a flight to catch the next day. But she rationalized that it couldn't hurt to spend some more time with her _friend_ , whom she hadn't seen in a long time. Plus, it wasn't until the mention of food that Holly realized she was hungry too, but simply giving in had never really been her style. "Since when is it my responsibility to feed you? Last time I checked you weren't a puppy."

"No, still a cat, a very hungry one and, fine, you don't have to feed me just keep me company. Or if you're hungry, I can feed you." _You could feed her, really Peck? That's the best you can come up_ , Gail chastised herself, trying hard not to roll her eyes at how lame that sounded even to her _._

Holy simply stared at the woman, extremely amused at her roundabout way of thinking and speaking. She couldn't help but think: _This woman is absolutely ridiculous, and adorable, definitely adorable_.

But when Gail didn't get a response, she started to backpedal, "I mean no pressure, if you're not hungry I can just drop you off wherever you're staying." _Stupid, that was stupid assuming she would want to grab food when she's probably tired and just wants to get away from you and all the craziness that surrounds you. This was just supposed to be a ride, a friendly gesture._ She kept her eyes staunchly on the road, but she felt a blush creep up her neck reaching her ears; she was embarrassing herself.

Holly smiled at how flustered the younger woman had gotten without her needing to say a word. She decided to reassure her and take her up on her offer, "Pizza sounds great. Anywhere in particular you want to go?"

"Actually there's a decent place not far from the frathouse. If you don't mind, maybe we can stop so I can change out of this get-up, it's not really pizza parlor friendly." While it had been fun getting dressed up for the wedding, Gail really didn't want to have to tase whoever decided to make some jackass comment to her when all she wanted was some food and to hang out with Holly without people staring.

Holly couldn't deny that she had been enjoying the outfit but she could understand the woman's desire to change into something more comfortable. "No problem at all, you're the one giving me the lift anyway."

Gail just smiled and headed in the direction of her apartment.

* * *

"Sorry for the pitstop but I thought it might be a good idea for a change of wardrobe, so you'd stop looking at me like that." Gail explained as they entered her apartment. She was walking ahead of the doctor and didn't bother to turn around as she confidently made her comment.

Sure, Holly had been staring most of the night and she had even showered the woman with compliments in lieu of a greeting, back at the beginning of the night when she wanted to see if she could still unravel the blonde with her words. But that felt like a lifetime ago and Holly thought she was being rather discreet, considering all the thoughts and images just seeing the woman had conjured in her head. "Like what?"

Gail stopped walking and turned around. Holly was rooted to her spot in the middle of the living room as the mesmerizing blonde stepped into the doctor's personal space and husked, "Like you want to peel me out of this dress with your teeth."

She saw the other woman's pupils dilate as she bit her lip. She chuckled at the look of unabashed wanting that crossed the brunette's face at the comment before she smugly sauntered away in the direction of her bedroom. "I'll only be a minute." She called over her shoulder.

It took every ounce of strength for Holly to not follow the blonde and to keep her hands, and teeth, to herself. The image those comments had evoked sent her libido into overdrive but she knew better than to act on it, even if she desperately wanted to. _This woman is going to be the death of you, Stewart_.

"SHIT!" The shout from Gail when she entered her room startled Holly from her daydream.

"Hey are you okay?" Holly called out, she was worried at the sudden expletive but wasn't sure that she should go see what had happened.

"Yeah, yeah I'm fine, no worries, I'll be out in a sec." Gail rushed to reassure her guest before she came to her room to check on her.

To say Gail had been scared shitless when she saw someone in her bed when she turned on the light in her room would be an understatement. She had still been thinking of the look on Holly's face and her far from innocent teasing that she wasn't paying enough attention to her surroundings, something she mentally reprimanded herself for. If she had, maybe she would have noticed the presence of her own personal Goldilocks sooner.

"Frankie what the hell are you doing in my bed?" Gail hissed as she shook the snoring woman. She wanted to shout to wake her up, but she also didn't really want her other visitor to hear her. It probably wouldn't look good to have another woman in her bed, not that it should matter, her and Holly weren't anything but she still didn't want her to get the wrong impression. She was also suddenly really glad that she hadn't actually tried to take Holly to bed or that Holly hadn't followed her after her tease, which was something Gail never thought she would be grateful for.

Realizing that the drunk in her bed was out like a light, she decided to just get changed and deal with the situation later. "I'm going to murder Gerald." Gail muttered to herself as she quickly stripped from the dress and heels. The presence of the sleeping woman in her room didn't bother her; even if the detective had been awake, it was nothing she hadn't seen before. "You're missing out on a great show, Frankie, I should be charging admission." Nope, nothing, the woman was out cold.

Rolling her eyes at the ridiculousness of the situation, Gail changed into a pair of well-worn jeans that she knew made her ass look great and a form fitted black t-shirt. She didn't really know why but she slipped the pendant Celery gave her into one of her pockets, something about the charm made her feel more confident. She ditched the heels for her patented black combat boots. She tied her hair back into a messy ponytail and made sure her make-up hadn't smudged before looking for the detective's phone. She plugged it into her charger, set an alarm and changed the ringtone to the most annoying sound she could think of, then put the ringer on full blast. "You'll enjoy that in the morning."

* * *

Holly started to look around the living room for any sort of distraction to clear her mind and get her body in check. She noticed picture frames scattered around the furniture and walls. The pictures seemed to be of a variety of kids. She was so engrossed in examining them, trying to determine whom the children could be that she didn't notice Gail come up behind her.

"They're foster kids." Holly jumped at the sound of Gail's voice only inches behind her. The detective easily guessed what she had been trying to figure out. "After everything that happened with Sophie, Chris convinced me to get my foster license with him. Most of the kids have been involved in cases and just needed a place to crash till their families could come for them. Some of them have sent letters to thank us or to tell us how they're doing and sometimes they include pictures."

Holly was impressed but not surprised by how generous the blonde could be to open up her heart and home to children in need. It was admirable, to say the least, but she imagined it took its toll on the guarded but vulnerable woman. "Must be hard letting them go."

Gail sighed, "Not as hard as it was with Sophie, but it's nice to feel like we're doing something, making some kind of difference even if it's just to give the kids a safe roof over their heads and a chance to play some video games and not think for a while."

Holly would never understand how Gail always found the strength to put others before herself, no matter how much it might hurt her. She knew it was probably long overdue but she still felt the need to say it, "I'm sorry things didn't work out with Sophie." _And I'm sorry I wasn't here to help you through it_ , she mentally added.

"Don't be, she's with a good family, she even has an adopted sibling. I couldn't be her mom, as badly as I wanted to, I didn't have enough support. This way she gets a whole family and not just a parent, plus, I still see her every once in a while and they like to send letters updating me about her life. The parents were very understanding, and Sophie still gets excited to see me. So that's cool," Gail had stoically given this speech many times whenever she was questioned about the little girl she couldn't call her own. But it felt different giving it to Holly; it made the hurt feel raw again. She really wanted to change the subject before her sadness swallowed her whole and she lost her appetite. She headed to the door, "Anyway we should probably go get some food."

Holly accepted the end of the conversation and turned to follow the blonde. That's when she noticed the outfit, it was Gail's signature look but it still took the doctor's breath away. While the dress earlier today was stunning in a regal sort of way, this look was more intimate in a weird way. It was how she remembered Gail on lazy days off, when they would finally manage to leave the bed in search of food and to rejoin humanity. Needless to say those memories were doing nothing to extinguish the raging inferno in her pants. _You are a grown woman, Holly Stewart, not a teenager. Get your hormones in check!_

Once outside, Gail decided that driving would cut the visit too short. So she decided to do something she hated doing, "Do you want to walk?"

Holly was surprised and a little suspicious; it wasn't like Gail to want to walk anywhere she didn't have to. At least not the Gail she remembered. "Walk?"

"One foot in front of the other, through leaves, over bridges..."

"Did you just quote Kurt Vonnegut?" It didn't surprise Holly that Gail would appreciate an author with a morose sense of humor.

"Maybe, so what do you say Catherine?" The blonde continued the charade.

"You do realize that makes you Newt?" Holly teased.

"Technically, I think you're more of a Newt." Gail retorted.

She had a point, Holly had been the one to show up out of nowhere, but she was the one being unusual. "You hate walking." Holly pointed out.

Gail just shrugged, "It's a nice night and the pizza place is just around the corner," then she decided to add in her own teasing, "I thought you were a jock, can't handle a little walk, Stewart?"

 _Challenge accepted._ "I'd offer to race you there but we both know I'd win, Peck."

"You are quite the runner." Gail conceded, before giving herself a head start and walking quickly in the direction of the food. "Try to keep up."

She hadn't meant anything by the comment but it still stung when the words reached Holly. Gail might have been a climber, but Holly, she was a runner. Holly shook off the bitterness and went to follow the blonde.

* * *

After they each ordered their pie, the two grabbed a seat to wait for the food. Gail had gotten a chicken, bacon, ranch pizza with extra bacon, while Holly had ordered a vegetable pie, no tomatoes. Gail couldn't help but notice the specification. "No tomatoes, huh, someone trying to get lucky?" She inquired with a smirk, flirting with Holly came as easily as breathing to the blonde.

"You're just lucky, I don't want to cross-contaminate your food." The brunette countered the tease. That wasn't the whole truth, Holly had gotten used to ordering food without tomatoes back when she was friends with Gail and had learned about her allergy. It hadn't been anything romantic, just thoughtful, as Holly was aware that Gail had a tendency to eat other people's leftovers after she finished her own food unless it had tomatoes in it, in which case she would just whine about how she couldn't eat it. When they started dating, it was more of a necessity. "Plus, now you won't have an excuse when I try to get you to eat a slice of something remotely healthy."

"Whoa, you know I hate vegetables. I'll stick with my protein and carbs." Yes, Gail was still just as juvenile when it came to her food.

"And cholesterol, I pity your blood vessels. You know, it won't kill you to try something new." The words rang a bell.

"You know, I've heard that before. Yet, I'm pretty sure I disproved your theory when you locked me in a metal cage facing a rocket launcher with nothing to protect me but a metal bat. It was inhumane." Gail made an exaggerated, horrified face at the mere thought.

Holly laughed a loud bright laugh, remembering that night in the batting cages. She could picture clearly how utterly ridiculous the blonde had looked throwing her bat at the ball and shrieking. She also remembered convincing the blonde to try again with her help, she could still feel the butterflies she had gotten when she had sidled up behind the other woman, molding their bodies together to get Gail to adopt a proper stance and whispering instructions in her ear. "As I recall, not only did you survive, but after a little coaching you actually managed to hit the ball."

"Well I had a good teacher, even though I'm pretty sure she was just trying to cop a feel." Gail winked.

"Ha, more like trying to make sure you survived to fight crime another day."

The banter continued throughout the meal, Holly even managed to convince Gail to try some of her "rabbit food" pizza after she agreed to try a slice of Gail's "myocardial infarction-waiting-to-happen." They teased and flirted their way through the food and it wasn't until the staff indicated that they were closing, that the two finally decide to head out. After Gail paid for both meals, despite Holly's protests, they started back in the direction of the apartment. They didn't talk about anything serious or their relationship (or lack there of). They reminisced and shared funny stories that reminded them of one another, like the time a cat followed Holly all the way home from her lab or the time Gail got Rodney to knock over an entire tray of instruments just by smiling at him. They teased and laughed in a way that they hadn't in a very long time. Without the pressure of the wedding and the prying eyes of the wedding guests to weigh them down, they just enjoyed being in one another's company again. Both were surprised at how easily it came, and neither was ready for it to end.

Without realizing it, both women walked slowly back to Gail's apartment, dragging out the couple of blocks for as long as they could as they continued laughing along the way.

"God, it was so bad, stupid Gerald overheard our conversation and he actually thought I was dying. I was talking about a bucket list for before I became a parent, which was surprisingly good advice I got from an inmate, by the way. You should have seen the look on his face I swear he was about to cry." Gail was laughing just thinking about fooling the rookie. "I did convince him to give me hip-hop dance lessons though."

The dark humor was something that Holly had always found attractive, but the thought of Gail getting dance lessons from the goofy man she saw earlier in the day was priceless. "Seriously? I would have paid to see those. Please tell me you recorded them."

"Hell no! He was an awful teacher." Gail quickly dismissed the notion that there would be any incriminating evidence of the dreadful dance lessons. If everyone thought Gerald-err, Duncan-was an awful student he was an even worse teacher.

Holly smirked, "You sure it wasn't the student?"

"Very funny, you wish you could see my moves, Stewart." Gail teased with a wiggle of her eyebrows.

 _You have no idea_ , Holly thought to herself. "Should I break out a boombox?"

"God no, no more music for tonight." Gail was still horrified just thinking about the wedding. They had arrived back at the blonde's apartment, "Well looks like we're here." The disappointment was evident in her voice, but with the night only getting later, she was out of ideas to avoid the inevitable. "Where are you staying?" Gail asked while pushing the button to unlock her car.

Holly was surprised that they had already made their way back, but was even more so when a phantom grey Ford Taurus beeped next to her. "At a hotel not far from the airport. Since when do you have a car?"

"Since, I grew up and started preparing to make the D's. I realized I couldn't rely on other people to chauffeur me around forever." That had surprised everyone. It wasn't that Gail couldn't drive, in fact she was an excellent driver, having grown up on the police course, she was just extremely lazy.

"Very nice." Holly was impressed both by the car, it looked like a Detective's car, and the change in the other woman, it was just another small example of her growing maturity, which was a bit of a turn-on.

"Looks even better on the inside, come on Nerd."

* * *

The drive to the hotel was relatively short and both women continued to chat amicably, avoiding any serious conversations. Most of it revolved around 15 and Gail's new promotion.

"So what are you leaning towards after you finish your probationary period." Holly was curious as to what the newest addition to the detective roster had planned.

"Probably Homicide. Guns-and-Gangs, Youth Services, Missing Persons, and Sex Crimes are all out. I could probably go over to Intelligence just to rain on Epstein's parade but hanging out with that many dorks will get old quickly."

Holly pondered the information for a minute. Guns-and-Gangs made sense after everything with Steve. Youth Services would eat away at the sensitive soul. She was pretty sure she knew why she wouldn't want to do the other two, but it was something Gail had never actually spoken to Holly about so she decided not to press it. Instead she remembered something the blonde had said while hanging out in her lab, "Thought you always said Homicide was lazy police work, since the victims were already dead."

Gail laughed, "Well you know me, I'm nothing if not lazy, plus it's not so bad."

"Detective Anderson makes it look appealing?" The words left Holly's mouth before she could even process them and the jealous inflection was unintentional, and slightly embarrassing. _What the hell Stewart? Where did that even come from?_

Gail noticed the tone and was tempted to mess with the doctor. If it had been one of her ex-boyfriends she would have reveled in the opportunity to make them jealous, but not with Holly. She didn't want to play games with her (at least not those kind of games). "Nah, actually some nerd once taught me all about how important it was to give a voice to the dead. Seems the message kind of stuck."

Holly couldn't help the warmth that spread across her chest at the words and the pride she felt at knowing that she really had influenced the woman in front of her. Not that she had been trying to, she always liked Gail the way she was, but it was an ego boost to know that she had shaped her life in some lasting way.

The good feeling ended though as she felt the car come to a stop and heard Gail say, "Anyway, looks like we're here, final stop." Gail looked at the hotel, she had been surprised when the doctor had said that was where she was staying. "Why are you staying at a hotel anyway, why not stay with your sister or one of your friends?"

 _Here's another chance Stewart, you can tell her about the job offer and see what she says._ Holly willed herself to tell the other woman about the position in Toronto. She knew she was being stupid keeping this to herself. They told each other things, or at least they used to. But she couldn't get out of her own head long enough to share. _What's the worst that could happen? Maybe she'll be excited and tell you to take it, or maybe she'll freak out and think you're coming back only for her and create another emergency situation. Plus, what happens if you don't come back? Then what? No, no, no this is a professional decision, not a personal one. You need to make this decision on your own and think about your career like you always have. This isn't about Gail, if you come back it's because you want to not for someone else. Plus, coming back doesn't mean you two will get back together._

Deciding to keep the job offer to herself she answered with another half-truth _,_ "I was only in town for a couple of days and didn't want to disturb them. Plus, I like having some space. Heather and the girls can be a handful. Rachel has her boyfriend and Lisa, is well, Lisa." When Holly had originally decided to fly out for the weekend, she wasn't sure she was going to tell anyone about it, in case she changed her mind or the offer wasn't going to pan out. It wasn't until the job was a real possibility and she had run into Chloe at the precinct that she decided to reach out to her friends and sister.

At the mention of Lisa, Gail remembered Frankie, and what had set all those events in motion. She chuckled to herself, causing Holly to tilt her head in question, a move that always got Gail to spill what she was thinking. "Speaking of the boob doctor, I'm pretty sure we have her to thank for why there is a passed out detective in my bed right now snoring louder than a freight train."

Holly frowned, trying to decipher what the other woman was talking about. Suddenly, it clicked, and she wasn't happy about it. "Wait, Detective Anderson is in your bed? And what does Lisa have to do with it?" _Seriously, Stewart you're really playing it cool tonight. You do know you have no right to be jealous._ But Holly seemed to have lost all sense of decorum while speaking with her ex; her filter was inadequate to say the least.

"I'm guessing she convinced Gerald to drop her off at my place, probably drank all my tequila too. But it looks like the chick she was seeing decided to put on a little show with a snobby plastic surgeon outside the hospital when Frankie went to pick her up." Gail felt bad for Frankie, it hurts to be second choice and to be in the front row to witness them with someone else sucks even worse.

"Damn, that does sound like something Lisa would do." She couldn't help herself, but she was curious what Gail would do about the other woman. She knew she didn't have any right to ask, but the thought of someone else in Gail's bed made Holly's stomach drop unpleasantly, especially when she remembered what Chloe had said about their relationship. "What are you going to do about the detective?"

"Why do ask doc, you jealous of someone else sleeping in my bed?" Gail really couldn't help teasing the brunette. She didn't have to defend herself; technically she could have anyone she wanted in her bed. But the one person she had wanted the most was the one sitting next to her, so it probably wouldn't help matters for Holly to think there was something going on that wasn't. Her and Frankie were just friends. Even when they had been more than that, Gail's heart had belonged to someone else, and Frankie had known it so she didn't try to compete with it, she just accepted their fooling around for what it was. "Don't be. I already programmed her phone for an early alarm with a very loud, shrill ringtone, and I'll probably just crash in the guestroom or on the couch."

Holly was unjustifiably relieved at the thought that Gail wasn't planning on climbing into bed with another woman, but she still couldn't shake the feeling of disappointment that her night with the prickly blonde had come to an end. She wasn't ready to say good-bye even though she knew her flight was leaving the next day and she still had an important decision to make. But, it was what it was.

Finally, Holly worked up the strength to say goodnight. She undid her seatbelt and turned to the driver. "Thank you for tonight. For the dance, and the pizza and the ride." She said softly before she leaned over to give Gail a kiss on the cheek. It was an innocent action, one reminiscent of the last kiss she sadly pressed to Gail's cheek before leaving for San Francisco.

But unlike that time, this time Gail turned her head ever so slightly and gently caught the unsuspecting doctor's lips with her own.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some habits are hard to break...


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for reading, kudoing, and commenting. I love hearing people's thoughts. So this is the penultimate chapter. Let's see if three years is enough to change people or if they are doomed to repeat the same mistakes.

Gail gently caught the unsuspecting doctor's lips. It was barely a whisper of a kiss before she pulled back slightly to adjust their angle. She gently tilted the doctor's chin with the tips of her fingers and applied more pressure when their lips met again. It was a chaste kiss; similar to the one they shared in the back of the coatroom at Frank and Noelle's wedding. When she pulled back she noticed Holly staring at her with a confused look, "I'm sorry, I-" but she couldn't finish her sentence before she felt Holly's lips crashing into hers.

This kiss was not gentle or chaste; it was hungry and demanding. She could feel Holly trying to push into her, and suddenly Gail really wished they weren't in a car where the center console was keeping them divided. She wanted to feel Holly against her, to be able to pull her close. She tangled her hands in the long, dark hair and got lost in the kiss. She didn't even realize it when Holly unbuckled her seatbelt for her (though in hindsight she appreciated the removal of the restraint) because she was too distracted by the feeling Holly's tongue tracing her bottom lip asking for entrance, and she was powerless to resist it. Opening her lips slightly and moaning at the sensation of Holly's tongue sweeping into her mouth, Gail could think of nothing but the overwhelming desire to taste every inch of this beautiful woman. Soon it became a battle for dominance, with each woman trying to control the kiss. It wasn't until the need for oxygen became too great, that they finally pulled apart.

Holly hadn't been thinking when she launched herself at Gail. If she had she probably would have hesitated but the gentle kiss from Gail had been enough to remind the doctor of how addictive the woman was, and she couldn't control how her body responded to her. It was utterly intoxicating and she needed more. Resting their foreheads together, Holly breathily uttered a simple request, "Come upstairs."

Gail couldn't answer, not verbally, she knew it would be a mistake to take her up on the offer. That she would just be setting herself up for more heartbreak but she couldn't resist the other woman any longer, there was only so much self-control one person could be expected to maintain. So she pulled Holly in for another kiss, one that was less demanding but still slow and deep. It was intentional, a promise of what was to come. This time when she pulled away, she saw the doctor's hooded eyes in a lustful daze. _That's more like it_ , she thought to herself, smugly _._ She wordlessly put the car into drive and looked for a parking spot.

They didn't talk as they entered the hotel or as they headed straight for the elevator. When the doors closed, Gail felt herself immediately pushed against the glass wall, being pinned to it by a very forceful Holly. Gail's mind could barely keep up with the sensory overload between the demanding kisses, the wandering hands under her shirt, and the wonderful feeling of Holly's hips slowly grinding into her. Every sensation was heightened by the danger of the elevator door opening at any minute to reveal their compromising position, the reckless abandon just fueling the fire growing in Gail even more. Then she felt the doctor's nimble hand slipping into her bra to cover her breast, Holly's fingers swiping against her already hardening nipple eliciting a moan and expletive from the blonde.

The sound of the elevator dinging to indicate they had reached the correct floor barely registered in her lust-addled mind before Gail felt herself being released just as suddenly as she had been grabbed. She watched Holly saunter out the open doors, leaving her panting against the wall, weak in the knees. She took a steadying breath, before taking off to catch the brunette, deciding that payback was necessary.

* * *

"Whoever invented these stupid cards was an idiot," Holly angrily muttered as she tried and failed once again to open the door to her room. Then again, it might have had very little to do with the actual card and more to do with the gorgeous blonde plastered against her, pressing kisses to the back of her neck, while her hands slid easily beneath the doctor's shirt. Every place the hands touched left a burning trail that made it impossible for the brunette to think, let alone function enough to get the stupid light to turn green and allow them entrance. _I'm going to fucking break this goddamn door down_. Holly might have been overreacting, but in her head it seemed appropriate at the moment.

Rather than respond, Gail simply placed one hand firmly on the taut abdomen of the pathologist, eliciting a shiver as she pressed their bodies impossibly closer, while using the other to take the keycard from the flustered woman. Without opening her eyes or stopping her assault on Holly's neck, she slipped the card into the slot and pulled it back smoothly allowing the door to finally, blessedly click open.

The two women stumbled into the room and this time Gail wasted no time pinning Holly to the nearest wall. The kisses were slightly sloppy and extremely needy, each one filled with years' worth of wanting. Holly eagerly pulled Gail close, her hands moving up to remove Gail's ponytail so that she could tangle her fingers in the short blonde hair. Each woman tried to intensify the kiss. It was all tongues and teeth clashing as the blonde pushed roughly against the doctor. But Gail wanted-no, needed-more.

Abandoning her lips, Gail moved to the doctor's neck to place hot, open-mouthed kisses in a path leading down to the swell of Holly's breasts revealed by the open buttons of the doctor's shirt. She reached for the uppermost button and slowly undid it, deciding that a change of pace was necessary, she wanted to enjoy every minute of this. She placed a kiss on the newly exposed skin. With each button being methodically undone, the kisses sank lower and lower. "Too many buttons," Gail muttered as she continued the slow descent.

Holly swallowed loudly and licked her lips. She tried to keep her voice steady as she teased, "I gave you a head start."

"Mmmm 'ppreciate it" Gail hummed against the tan skin, intent on getting the damn shirt off. Finally the last button popped open and Gail returned to Holly's lips for a long, slow kiss as her hands roamed across the exposed skin, grateful for the freedom to explore. She had missed the feeling of the toned woman and wasted no time reacquainting herself with every trembling muscle and gentle curve of the gorgeous brunette. It wasn't until her fingers slid down to the button on Holly's pants that she suddenly felt herself being halted.

Holly pulled back as much as she could with the wall behind her, as she tried to regain some semblance of self-control, trying her best to ignore the ache that was growing between her legs. Gail may have been the one to start the kiss, but Holly had been the instigator to get them to this point. She just couldn't control herself around the other woman, her body responding without thought to their natural chemistry. But it wasn't fair, she hadn't been completely honest with Gail and what she hadn't said might change the blonde's mind about what they were about to do. If Gail only wanted a one-night stand and Holly came back for the job, things would be awkward. If she wanted more than one night and Holly stayed in Boston, they would get hurt. As much as Holly wanted to continue and to drag the blonde to bed, she knew sex would complicate things.

"Gail, maybe we should stop. Maybe we shouldn't..." She trailed off as the blonde simply redirected her attention back to Holly's neck, paying special attention to the spot just below her jaw that she had always loved. Holly gasped as she bit the spot, before tenderly soothing it with a gentle swipe of her tongue. She could feel the pale hands rest on her hips holding her in place.

Gail removed her lips only long enough to ask, "Do you want to stop?" before taking her ministrations up a notch.

Holly felt Gail slide her thigh between her legs and push up into her core. "No...fuck...no, but..." Holly couldn't complete the thought, hell she couldn't think of anything and she certainly couldn't resist grinding down on the cop's leg, relishing in the desperately craved friction.

"But what?" Gail was teasing her, continuing to suck on her neck, while the hands resting on her hips urged her on at an agonizingly slow pace.

"But..." Holly continued breathlessly, "But there's something I haven't told you." _Really Stewart, you've had all night to tell her about this damn job and this is when you want to do it? What the hell is wrong with you? You're supposed to be smart, shut the hell up and enjoy this!_

"Do you have a girlfriend, fiancé, or wife?" Gail knew what the answer would be but figured it couldn't hurt to ask, her hands never stopping their incessant urging.

"No, of course not." The question snapped Holly out of her own thoughts, her hands leaving the other woman's shoulders to rest on her arms, halting her movements. "Do you?"

"No, so whatever it is can wait." At the moment, Gail really didn't care what Holly hadn't told her, she had known all night that the brunette had been holding something back, but she could keep her secret if Gail could have the rest of her. She was tired of talking. She gave the doctor a long, deep, toe-curling kiss taking her time to explore every inch of her mouth before pulling back.

"But..." Holly tried once more without any conviction.

Gail looked at Holly, trying to convey everything she felt for the woman, everything she had wanted for them, every second of being apart that she wanted to make up for. "No more buts, I want this, I want you, Lunchbox. I've been waiting three years for you; I don't want to wait any longer. "

That was it, the desire in the those stormy blue eyes combined with the term of endearment falling from the swollen, red lips was enough to push any doubts out of Holly's head. She pushed off the wall, steering the blonde backwards, stripping off her t-shirt and pushing her roughly to the bed, "Alright, no more waiting."

* * *

Both women lay on their backs, trying to catch their breaths, as their thundering heartbeats returned to normal. While they had started out rushed and rough, the two had eventually slowed down and taken their time to reacquaint themselves with each other's body, determining what had changed with time. They scrupulously traced every new scar and blemish on one another reverently, committing it all to memory and trying to erase the time and distance that had kept them separated for too long. There was something about the two of them, some kind of natural magnetism, that couldn't be denied or resisted, so they gave in to it, and then gave in to it again. But now that the deed was done, their desires finally sated, what came next?

The realization hit Gail that she didn't know how to act around Holly. Whenever, they had had sex in the past there had been no question about them curling up together in post-coital bliss, either falling asleep or simply recharging for the next round. But that had been when they had been in a relationship, something that they weren't in right now. Gail wasn't sure if she should leave or pull the other woman to her and fall into heavenly sleep, she knew what she wanted to do but didn't think it was her place. "Umm I should probably...should I umm..." Gail couldn't even say the words; she didn't want to leave but she also didn't know if Holly wanted her to. She hoped she didn't.

Holly looked beside her and saw the troubled expression on Gail's face, although the blonde made a point to not take her eyes off the ceiling. _Does she regret what we just did? Was it really just a one-time thing and now she's gearing up to go?_ Holly had never had to worry about Gail just slinking out of her bed afterwards in the past, and the thought of it happening now didn't feel right. She studied the other woman carefully, the blonde hadn't actually gotten up to leave, just kind of threw the idea out there. The words came out in a rush, "You could stay...I mean if you want to...you don't have to but you also don't have to go if you don't want to ...it's late after all, and it's been a long day...so you know you're more than welcome to -" But this time Holly was cut off by a gentle kiss from Gail.

"No need to ramble, Lunchbox, I'll stay."

* * *

The pensive blonde laid on her back with the brunette's head resting on her chest, her arm sprawled across her abdomen and their legs tangled together. Although they had started out sleeping side by side, Gail hadn't been resting for long when she felt the other woman curl up on top of her, almost out of habit. She didn't mind it, on the contrary, she reveled in it but she couldn't fall back to sleep, so she just tried to enjoy having the woman she desperately missed back in her arms. She absent-mindedly drew circles on Holly's bare back while her mind raced with thoughts, _God, she's so fucking beautiful, I missed this, I missed her, all of her. One night isn't enough. How can I be expected to just let her go when I finally have her back, and never see her again? Maybe, it doesn't have to end here. What's holding you back this time Peck? Last time you had Sophie, your family, the Peckspectations. You lost Sophie, Steve's in jail and your parents haven't spoken to you since they kicked you out of their house after that day in court. Plus, almost everything the Pecks told you turned out to be complete, and utter hypocritical bullshit. There's your job, technically you can be a cop anywhere, but can you really leave Toronto? You're supposed to be loyal, but really what has the city ever given you that hasn't been taken away? Maybe you could try long-distance, or maybe you could just go to the States too. Really Peck, you want to chase after someone? Do you even know how to chase? Would she even want you to go? Maybe, this was only a one-off for her. A way to get some closure and get you out of her system. If that's the case, then why ask you to stay and why is she holding onto you so tightly?_

"You're thinking too loudly," Holly grumbled into Gail's chest.

"Sorry." Gail had thought the doctor had fallen asleep. She thought she was safe to worry and torment herself in the quiet darkness of Holly's hotel room.

"What are you thinking about?" Holly sleepily muttered.

_Oh, you know everything: how much things have changed, how good it feels to have you in my arms again, how I never want to let you go, how you're the only good thing I've ever wanted that I feel like I could have. How you still make me want to be better, just so I could have the chance to be worthy of you. How badly I'll screw this up. How you're leaving me, again, and all that will be left is a memory of this moment that will fade with time. Melodramatic much, Peck? Maybe you should go with something a bit lighter._

"Boston isn't that far away." Gail said nonchalantly, hoping that the statement was vague enough that she could easily back out of the conversation if necessary.

"Eight-hundred eighty-five kilometers. An eight and a half hour drive without traffic. An hour and a half flight." Holly rattled off the facts as her overstocked mind tried to fight off the fogginess of sleep. She hadn't slept much the night before, too busy tormenting herself about the job offer, wedding invitation, and what would happen when she saw the blonde again. Not that her imagination had done any of it justice. She had then spent the day with her family before going to the wedding, which was an adventure on its own. If that wasn't enough the last couple of hours spent getting the woman beneath her to moan her name and vice versa should've been enough to knock anyone into unconsciousness.

Gail laughed, "You would know that, Nerd." She waited a moment before adding, "It's a lot closer than San Francisco."

"Indeed." Holly mumbled, she wasn't sure where Gail was going with this, she knew where she hoped she would go but she was tired and it was Gail; Gail was weird.

 _She isn't going to make this easy is she?_ Gail took a deep breath and held it for a moment before slowly exhaling. _Should I just tell her how I feel? How much I've missed her, how I never want to let her go again, how I'll do anything she wants to give us another chance? How I'd do long distance or even uproot my life if it meant getting to have this feeling of happiness and contentment._ "Before you say anything, just hear me out...I know this is crazy, and overwhelming, and probably a little insane, but I still want to be with you, I never stopped wanting to be with you. I know that things ended badly, but I want another chance, if you'll have me. I want all of it, Lunchbox, the late night conversations, the inside jokes, getting to take you out on dates, falling asleep in each other arms, and waking up to see that sweet, nerdy smile on your face. And if I can have the chance to have any of that for even a fraction of the time, I'm game. I want us to work it out, whatever it takes, but I want to be an us again."

Gail held her breath, waiting for a response from the woman she adored, the one she hadn't stopped thinking about since she stumbled into her crime scene carrying a lunchbox-err, forensic kit. She had put her heart out there not knowing if she would be rejected, if she would overwhelm the doctor and end up ruining any chance for reconciliation, but she had to try. She couldn't just let her go, not again.

But a response was not forthcoming; in fact, Holly hadn't stirred at all during Gail's speech. When Gail peeked at the woman laying across her she noticed the slow, steady breathing and the heaviness of her limbs. Holly had fallen asleep on her, and as adorable as it may have been, it would have been nice if she had waited until after the heartfelt speech.

Gail sighed, "Good talk coach." Well practice makes perfect, so Gail would just have to try it again in the morning.

* * *

It was around 4am when Gail stirred from the most restful sleep she had had in a very long time. Sometime in the night, her and Holly had shifted so that Gail was the little spoon with their arms and legs still tangled together. But the soft buzzing of Gail's phone on the floor beside the bed had broken through her slumber. As much as she didn't want to move or disturb her companion, she knew she needed to check it. She managed to slip out of the bed without waking Holly, who simply wrapped herself around Gail's pillow instead. _Good thing she's still a freakishly heavy sleeper_.

"Peck" she whispered hoarsely into the phone, trying hard not to wake the sleeping beauty in the room.

Swarek was on the other end of the line, someone had found a body in a weird part of town and they were the ones assigned to the case. He gave her an address and told her to get her ass there ASAP.

 _Great fucking timing, can't killers take the weekend off_? Gail quickly dressed and then peered over at the still unconscious brunette. _She really is the most beautiful thing I've ever seen._ _Alright Peck, stop staring like a creeper, you have a job to do, the sooner you get there, hopefully the sooner you'll get done and maybe you'll get the chance to talk to her before her plane leaves._

Gail got dressed and made sure she had everything, and then she used her phone to try to find one of those little pads of papers and pen that every hotel room had. She wanted to at least leave Holly a note so that she didn't think she had simply slipped out in the dead of the night, and to let her know that she wanted a chance to talk before she left. She checked each of the end tables, but there was none in sight so she headed over to the desk.

On the desk were plenty of papers but no notepad. Gail couldn't help glancing curiously at the work Holly had left out, assuming it would be whatever project she was working on. Sure enough, there was a thick pile of papers that looked like a grant proposal, which must have been for the research Holly had mentioned earlier. But beside it was a much shorter piece of paper. It didn't take much to tell that it was Holly's two-weeks notice. _What the...what? Why would Holly be quitting a job she just started? Especially, when she had clearly been looking for funding for her newest project._ Half-hidden under the letter was another paper that described the Assistant M.E. position for Toronto. _What the hell? Why wouldn't she tell me she had been here because of a job offer? She had plenty of opportunities, why keep that to herself?_ Gail really couldn't fathom why she wouldn't mention it at all; it was a chance to come back to Toronto, potentially permanently.

Then the realization dawned on her, _she hasn't made a decision yet. She doesn't know if she wants to come back even though it's the job she wanted when we first met. She used to prattle on and on about her 10 year plan_. _Maybe she doesn't want it anymore? Or maybe she just doesn't want to come back here. So what was last night all about?_

Gail was stuck between anger and disbelief as she looked down at the papers, the reason for her getting up in the first place completely forgotten until the phone she had been using for light vibrated in her hand, reminding her she was supposed to be on her way to a crime scene. Gail turned off the light on her phone and put it back in her pocket, her fingers brushing against the piece of cool metal she had placed there earlier in the night. She pulled out the charm Celery had given her, turning it over in her hand. _Sometimes it's not enough_.

* * *

Holly awoke when she reached over to the cool side of the bed. She hastily sat up, reaching blindly for her glasses, forgetting where they had been haphazardly thrown the night before. She listened for a moment and when there were no sounds to be heard, the realization hit her that she was alone. Gail had left her, again. The blissful sleep that she had been enjoying was long forgotten and a hollow feeling set in the pit of her stomach. She had thought the two of them had shared a connection, that maybe they had been able to rekindle something special, but it seemed the feelings had only been one-sided. "DAMN IT!" Holly groaned as she fell back onto the bed covering her eyes with her hands.

* * *

"I fucking hate you so much." Detective Anderson grumbled as she stumbled her way to Gail's car, slitty-eyed and even grouchier than usual.

"Good morning to you too sunshine," Gail responded coolly, while handing the hungover woman a coffee. "You're wearing _my_ clothes while sitting in _my_ car after getting to sleep in _my_ bed, and I brought you coffee. You should be asking me to marry you. "

"I hate the way you chew," Frankie deadpanned. "Maybe I would have been more inclined to show some gratitude if I hadn't had a phone stuck next to my ear with Chloe Muppet Price's shrill ass voice set to the highest volume saying 'Wakey, Wakey' on an endless loop. Why do you even have a recording of that?"

"Dov set it up as my alarm once after a night at the Penny. He regretted it the next morning when I cut off the hot water during his shower." Gail smirked at the memory.

"I'll remember that as I plot your demise." Frankie was even surlier than usual, as she sipped her coffee. "You should really be nicer to your superior."

"You should really not make it a habit to crawl into your subordinate's bed, especially uninvited." Gail challenged the detective, "I still don't know why you're complaining, I had to make sure you woke up and got your ass out of _my_ bed."

"Speaking of, where were you?" She glanced over at the ruffled clothes of the blonde detective-in-training. It didn't take much to deduce that the woman who hadn't been in her own apartment was doing a walk-of-shame. Although, technically those weren't the clothes that she had on the last time Frankie saw her, unless her bleary eyes were deceiving her.

"None of your damn business." Gail's tone had an edge to it, warning the other woman to drop the subject. It wasn't up for discussion.

But Frankie had never been very good about observing such warnings, "Touchy, you know for someone who got laid you should really be more cheerful, unless it wasn't that good."

"Fuck you, Anderson" Gail spat, all clever retorts vanishing as her mounting anger caused her blood to boil. _It had been fucking great, earth-shattering, heartbreakingly amazing_ , but Gail kept those thoughts to herself.

"You already have, Peck." Frankie threw a smirk Gail's way, she loved toying with the other woman, it was one of her favorite past times.

Gail just clenched her jaw and gripped the steering wheel even harder. She really wasn't in the mood to be messed with but she refused to take the bait this time.

As much as Frankie wanted to continue poking fun at Gail, she was tired and hungover. Plus the other woman clearly didn't want play along, so she decided to drop the topic...for now.

"God, I feel like shit, I should have called in sick." Frankie moaned.

"If you feel so bad, maybe you should call your nurse." Gail was still bitter about the comments Frankie had been making and the mess she had going on in her own head, but she also knew that Frankie still wanted to be with the other woman. It's why she had spent the night seeking out Gail, her friend, and not picked up some stranger in the bar. At least one of them should have a shot at happiness.

The mention of the woman Frankie had been seeing, the one who had triggered her epic night of binge drinking and unintentional hanging out with Gerald caused Frankie to shoot for a low blow, "Think I'd rather call your doctor."

Gail really wanted to hit a pothole and send the detective's coffee spilling all over herself, but she refrained considering the other woman was wearing her clothes. She gritted her teeth and tried to keep her face neutral. The more she showed Frankie her anger, the more the detective would dig in.

"That was her at the wedding wasn't it?" Frankie continued in a different tone, this one more empathetic. They were friends even if neither would admit it, bitchy buddies. After fooling around with each other for a while, Frankie had realized that Gail wasn't over her ex (apparently, as she had been informed by everyone but Gail, that ex was Dr. Holly Stewart, the hottie from the lab). It wasn't something that Gail had tried to hide, just something she refused to talk about, but it was painfully written all over her. Frankie wasn't one to play second fiddle to anyone, but once she realized she actually didn't mind hanging out with Gail without sex, she decided to try to help her get over the doc. This had resulted in the two of them playing wingman for one another on many occasions. But no woman ever seemed to stick for the blonde.

"Yep." Gail popped the "p" loudly.

"So how was a night with the woman you're still head over heels for?" For some strange reason, Frankie was actually curious if Peck had been successful in rekindling things with the woman she was clearly still lovesick for. Maybe she had been at 15 Division for too long.

"Ok, one: we're not having this conversation, and two: I didn't think your drunken stupor allowed you to identify or remember anyone from last night." Gail just wanted to change the subject.

"Gerald filled me in on the ride over to yours." The boy was useless when it came to most things, but he apparently made a decent chauffeur and source of gossip.

Gail muttered to herself, "I'm going to fucking kill Gerald."

The blonde was being way too uptight; whatever had happened last night with the doctor had her on edge. Which meant, she had either ruined whatever it was, or the other woman left her again, and Frankie was going to have to deal with another round of hurt and angry Gail. Regardless, this was the making of a very unpleasant day, so Frankie tried to lighten the mood, "Relax, you're supposed to be solving homicides not committing them."

Gail didn't laugh, she was over it and just wanted to go the rest of the ride in silence. Finally, Frankie decided to take the hint and just leave the other woman be. She needed more sleep anyway. It took a while but they finally arrived at the address Swarek had given them. It turned out to be an old, abandoned factory for creating dolls. It was creepy to say the least.

"Nice of you ladies to finally join us," Swarek called out as the women approached. He was near the body.

Gail handed the man a coffee, she technically had only just started her rotation, so coffee was a requirement. She really hated essentially being a rookie again.

"What do you see Peck?" Swarek expected the newest member of the team to do more than just provide refreshments. He knew Gail had been raised by the Pecks to be hyper-vigilant, so at the very least she should be able to give a detailed run through.

Gail took the time to take in the surroundings, as well as, the body. "Victim looks to be a relatively young, Caucasian female probably in her twenties if I had to guess. Looks like she's been stabbed multiple times, but there isn't a lot of blood so she was probably dropped here after she was killed. Killer probably figured no one would be around to see him and that the body wouldn't be found for a while." Swarek nodded along to Gail's assessment, while Frankie took a look around the factory.

Gail couldn't put her finger on it but something about the body was ringing a bell. "There's something familiar about this."

"What do you mean?"

"I don't know I just feel like I've seen this before." There was something about the pattern of the wounds that reminded Gail of something she had seen before, but she couldn't put her finger on it. It made her insides crawl and her whole body tense. She couldn't explain the feeling of deja vu but it was there.

"Well maybe forensics will come up with something more than a feeling." Swarek pulled off his gloves and headed in the direction of the newly arrived forensics team.

* * *

Holly got up a couple of hours later. She didn't know how long it was before she had fallen back to sleep after she realized Gail had left, but she didn't feel rested at all. She looked around for her glasses, and once she found them, she took a quick glance around the room, hoping the blonde woman had potentially left a note that she hadn't noticed before. A perfunctory look at the end tables and the bed showed nothing, and she let out a long sigh. She thought they had settled last night that she should stay, _why would she wait to sneak off in the middle of the night?_ She had no idea why Gail would leave like that. Well, she had a few ideas and none of them were good, they all centered on Gail freaking out and climbing trees or her just wanting a one-night stand. _But if that had been the case why wouldn't she have left right away? Why stay and cuddle?_ Holly tried to push the thoughts away and headed for the shower. She still had a flight to catch, and maybe a shower would help wash away all these annoying thoughts. She turned on the water but the shower just reminded her of another one, _"Life...I mean you can plan, plan and prepare, it doesn't really matter because things just go where they want to go."_ Gail's soft voice rang in Holly's head _._ Even when drunk, Gail could be so right.

* * *

"We've been going over this for hours" grumped Frankie; the detective was still hungover despite aspirin and multiple cups of coffee. She looked, and felt like shit, and really just wanted to go home. They hadn't been making any progress once they got back to the office. They were waiting on forensics to give them something to work with and the fingerprints hadn't been a match to anyone in the system. The vic also didn't match any recent missing persons reports.

"What's wrong Anderson? Rough night?" Swarek asked, he hadn't noticed her impromptu appearance at the reception the night before. He was too wrapped up in his own pregnant wife to notice much else. But that was nothing new when it came to McSwarek.

Frankie glared at the man, "No, it was peachy."

Swarek just shook his head, "So Peck you got anything more than a feeling to work off of?"

Gail was slumped down in her chair with her head resting on the back of it as she swayed side to side. Her eyes continued to stare at the pictures they had tacked up on the board, never leaving their target despite her movement. She stopped suddenly and sat up. "There's a pattern to the wounds, they're not as random as someone would think. I'm pretty sure there was a victim with similar stab wounds a couple of months ago. I worked it in uniform with Price and our rookies." Gail went to pull up the file. "Take a look."

The two senior detectives looked at the pictures from the previous crime. "They do look similar," Swarek conceded. "Alright I'll give the lab a call and ask them to compare any evidence they find to this other victim."

"The other one was also a Jane Doe, so we still don't have much to go on." Frankie pointed out.

"No, but it's a start, good eyes Peck." Swarek gave the newest detective some praise before stepping out to make the call.

The acknowledgement should have pleased Gail but the knots in her stomach from the scene were still nagging her. She closed her eyes and tried to clear her mind, but instead she saw dark eyes, and a crooked smile.

* * *

After her shower, Holly dressed and packed her carry-on bag (no, it wasn't a backpack). Once she was certain she had most of her things, she went over to the desk to look at the papers she had forgotten she left there the day before. She was finally starting to lean in one direction but she wanted to look at all the circumstances again, it couldn't hurt. That's when she noticed the glinting piece of twisted metal sitting atop her papers. It certainly didn't belong to her; she had never seen the thing before in her life. A wave of guilt crashed into Holly, _Gail_ : she had seen the papers, she knew about the job and that Holly hadn't told her about it. _FUCK!_ And rather than stick around to talk about it the blonde had taken off, again. Holly sighed, everyone had warned her not to take Gail into consideration when she made this decision. Maybe they had been right.

* * *

"Alright, lab says it'll be hours before they have anything but they'll give us a call when they do. Why don't we call it a day, we've already been at this for hours, we can start fresh with it tomorrow." Swarek dismissed the other two women, who were both more than happy to agree.

Frankie waited till Swarek left, and it was just her and Gail together gathering up their stuff. She didn't do girl-talk but she couldn't help wondering what Gail was planning on doing about the doctor. "You going to go see your girl?"

"You going to go see yours?" Gail bit back, she was practically snarling at Frankie.

"Whoa there kitten, no need to bare your teeth I was just wondering."

Gail huffed out an angry breath, she didn't want to talk to anyone about Holly, she was tired of hearing everyone's opinions on her life and what she should do. She was also tired of people referring to Holly as hers. She wasn't. She had left Gail once already and was leaving again today to go back to Boston. And when she was offered a chance to come back, she didn't even discuss it with her. She was just planning on making a decision on her own without any input from Gail no matter how much it affected her. Holly had had multiple opportunities to talk about the job and she chose to keep it to herself. Gail still couldn't shake the feeling that last night had been some kind of test or experiment of sorts, a way for Holly to see if she was worth coming back for, without actually suggesting it.

"And like I told you before, I'm over what's her face. It's time to move on and find someone more my speed. We should go to that new club tonight, drinking, dancing and we can both find someone new." Frankie decided to pull the blonde out of her own thoughts for the night, where she was sure to torment herself. Plus, it never hurt to find a distraction.

Gail had no intention of going to any club. She just wanted to curl up in bed and sleep until she had to go to work the next day. Maybe then she wouldn't think about Holly or the fact that she left, again. "Thought you were hungover?"

"Hair of the dog" Frankie responded quickly.

Gail really wasn't in the mood. "I need sleep." _And tequila, and cheesepuffs, probably a violent video game, and to just turn off my brain._

"Excuses. We aren't heading out right now. Go back to your place, nap, change because you look like a crap then come over to mine, it's closer. Plus, it'll give me time to get out of your clothes and escape your poor excuse for a fashion sense. You own like no professional clothing whatsoever. I honestly contemplated coming to work naked."

"Eh, I've seen better," Gail knew how insufferable Frankie's ego could be, she even managed to put Gail to shame on occasion, so she couldn't pass up opportunities to knock her down a peg. She shifted gears; maybe if she annoyed Frankie enough about her nurse and last night, she could get her to drop the club idea. "Done avoiding your place?"

Frankie groaned, "I don't know why but she left some stuff there and I really don't feel like having to chuck it out my window."

"Overdramatic much." Gail couldn't help but laugh a little at the other woman's nonexistent plight, if Frankie hadn't wanted to let the other woman in she wouldn't have. If she hadn't balked at the idea of a commitment, then there probably wouldn't have been any kind of display at the hospital last night, Gail had seen Frankie and the nurse together, the other woman had been smitten. Maybe self-sabotage wasn't just a Peck thing.

"Come on Peck you know you want to be my wingman. It'll get your mind off the doc and your body under someone new." Frankie was undeterred.

Gail narrowed her eyes at the other woman, "Just because you want to sleep your way through the entire city of Toronto, rather than just admit you messed up when the nurse said she wanted a commitment, doesn't mean I have to help you."

"Yes it does." Frankie said simply, like it was obvious.

"On what planet?" Gail often questioned why she put up with Frankie, but she did none-the-less.

"On the planet where chances are you fucked up last night too and rather than admit it and do something about it, you would rather avoid it by holing up in your apartment. So instead you are going to put your scrawny ass into something slutty and come out with me tonight." They were too similar for their own good.

"Whatever," Gail was tired of arguing, and tired of being at work, "Can we just get out of here, before someone decides they need us for something and we never get to leave?"

"Drive me home." Frankie wasn't asking.

 _Like I have a choice,_ Gail thought to herself as she sighed deeply. She grabbed her stuff and prepared to finally head home, where she could wallow in private.

* * *

Holly made her decision, scrawling her signature with a sense of finality, and gathering all the papers into a neat pile on the desk. She put them away in her bag and looked around one last time to ensure she hadn't forgotten anything. It was time to check out, so she closed the door behind her and headed down to the lobby. After stopping at the front desk, she headed out to the curb and hailed one of the nearby taxis. Tossing the bag beside her, she told the driver where to go and settled back into her seat. She looked out the window at the passing Toronto scenery as the cab took off, taking her where she needed to go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One step forward...two steps back...


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this chapter marks the end of the tangled tale I've weaved. Thank you to everyone who has decided to read, kudo, and/or comment. So without further ado...

Gail had finally dropped off Frankie. For a woman who wasn't a chatterbox like Princess Price or Girl Guide McNally, she still didn't know when to shut the hell up. She loved to goad Gail and rub salt in her wounds, so depositing her at her own apartment had been a blessing. It also finally gave Gail some time alone with her thoughts as she drove back to her own bed.

_Alright, mental rundown of last night: Your ex-girlfriend accepted an invitation to the wedding of your "friends", said "friends" plotted the whole night to set the two of you up, you dance, flirted, and talked both on the dance floor and the balcony, you specifically asked her about why she was in Toronto and at the wedding, you had the chance to leave for the night and you waited for her like the pathetic loser you are because you wanted to see her, you drove her back, shared pizza, walked which you never do and drove her to her hotel during all of which she had plenty of opportunities to tell you about why she was back, she said goodnight, you kissed her, she kissed you back and invited you to her room, you had mind-blowing sex, then she asked you to stay and cuddled with you, you got called out at the ass crack of dawn to a crime scene and before you left your accidental snooping revealed a job offer that she appeared determined to not tell you about. Then you left without any explanation and by now she has probably already left the country...Awesome..._

Gail knew she had probably blown whatever chances she had the second she left without any explanation, but no matter how she looked at the night, it felt tainted. Holly purposefully kept quiet about the job offer and for what? So she could make a decision without Gail having a say? But if it had nothing to do with the cop why had she shown up to the wedding and spent her time trying to see her? The thought should have made Gail happy, but it kind of made it feel like a test. She had been covertly judged and tested her whole life with the Pecks, every event seen as some kind of opportunity where she was supposed to prove herself worthy of her name. But it had never been that way with Holly, she had never felt like she needed to prove anything, she would never understand it but she could just be herself and that was good enough. _But maybe being yourself isn't enough anymore? It hadn't been enough to get Holly to stay in the first place, it wasn't enough for her to come back or even to stay in touch over the last three years, and it probably wasn't enough to convince her to take a job she had once wanted._

Nope, to Gail, last night had been the universe's way of showing her what she could have and then taking it all away, again.

* * *

Holly had been seated for a long time. She had been waiting patiently, but she was tired of waiting. Her back hurt and the coffee she had gotten was already cold. She could get up and stretch her aching muscles, but that seemed like more work than it was worth. It had been a long weekend for sure. She was mentally, physically, and emotionally exhausted. She had wasted countless opportunities to talk with the woman who still had her wrapped around her finger and for what? Because she was scared to actually admit her feelings, because she didn't want to make a decision that could impact her personally, because she didn't know if she was ready to settle down in one spot for longer than a year, because she didn't know how to go back home? Did she even know where home was?

* * *

Gail's phone went off as she neared her neighborhood. She came to a red light and checked the unread message.

**Det. Grumpier: Not going to the club tonight**

Gail was relieved but curious about the sudden change of heart. Frankie had been adamant about going out and moving on. Not that Gail wanted either of those things. But she didn't seem to be capable of getting what she actually wanted.

**Det. Awesome: Not that I care but why not?**

It didn't take long to get a reply; Frankie probably figured there would be a follow-up.

**Det. Grumpier: Nurse showed up...having a house call**

**Det. Awesome: Gross**

**Det. Grumpier: Jealous**

**Det. Awesome: Never**

But she was, jealous that is. Even Anderson could manage to find someone who would come back, and she was a self-proclaimed womanizer who bounced from one beautiful catch to the next on a quest to never settle down. This chick had tried to get a commitment out of Frankie and when she failed, tried to make her jealous and yet there they were, trying again, and Frankie still wanted to see her. Maybe Frankie and Gail were alike? Clearly they were both gluttons for punishment. But Frankie's girl wanted to stick it out even if she went about it the wrong way. Maybe it really was just Gail who could fail so miserably. The blonde let out a long sigh and tried to focus on driving.

* * *

It was getting later, and Holly was getting anxious. Her flight was due to leave in a couple of hours and she was tired of waiting. _Maybe it'll be better when you get on the plane._ _At least that seat will be more comfortable_.

* * *

Gail just wanted to get home. She was tense. Every muscle in her body felt tightly coiled, and had since the moment she saw the papers back at the hotel room. The crime scene only added to the pressure that felt like it was crushing Gail, she couldn't shake the images of the body out of her head and it was starting to stir up memories from a few years ago, of things that still gave her nightmares. It was really no condition to be in, she just wanted to get back to her apartment and shower and wash it all away. _"Come on, let's wash this mess down the drain."_ The doctor's tender voice traversed Gail's mind. _Damn, it's gonna have to be a cold shower._ Maybe instead of a shower, she could just sleep and put the awful day behind her, except that wouldn't change anything. Holly would still be gone and Gail would still be alone and confused, and probably tense.

* * *

 _What are you even doing Stewart? This is stupid...you're being stupid. Everyone always says how smart you are and yet you're sitting here, being stupid. What the hell is wrong with you? Maybe if you get up now it won't be too late?_ But Holly stayed rooted to her spot. _OK, maybe you can be stupid for a little while longer._

* * *

Gail let out a sigh of relief as she neared her neighborhood. Turning onto her street she was focused on getting back to her apartment and getting out of her own head, but the sight in front of her sent the thoughts of going home quickly out of Gail's mind, and she suddenly contemplated circling around the block rather than parking. No, it wasn't the most mature reaction, but she still had some growing up to do after all. The woman that she left that morning, the one she thought would've been back in Boston by now, tearing up the Toronto offer on the way, was sitting on her front steps and Gail was on the verge of panicking, again. But what good would running do her now? She couldn't escape her feelings last night, and sure enough, she couldn't escape them now. The relief that always came with seeing Holly was battling with the hurt and disappointment she had been feeling since that morning. Gail braced herself as she pulled into a spot out front and got out of her car, she carefully approached the seated woman. "Hey."

Holly looked up and gave a small, shy smile. She had been waiting for a while and had begun to wonder if she would actually get a chance to see Gail before she had to leave. "Hi"

"Hey"

"You said that already." Holly pointed out with a smirk.

"You know, it sounded familiar." Gail could feel the beginning of a smile tugging at her lips at the familiarity of her words, but she worked to keep her face neutral. She didn't understand what Holly was doing sitting on her steps when she should've at least been at the airport by now. She made a dramatic show of looking around, "Last time I checked this wasn't Boston, so what are you doing here?" The words came out harsher than she meant them to, but that was Gail and she was still the Ice Queen, so it shouldn't have been a surprise.

The smirk on Holly's face quickly vanished; she looked away from the piercing blue eyes, glancing down at her hands in her lap, suddenly extremely nervous. "Flight doesn't leave till later."

"So you figured my steps were a good place to wait? I hear there are chairs in the airport, probably be more comfortable." _Yep, Peck, you're still a sociopath, you can't express yourself without it oozing sarcasm._

"I umm...I wanted to talk to you before I left. When I woke up this morning you were gone and I didn't get a chance to say good-bye so I thought I would see if you were home. Chris said you weren't around and he let me drop my stuff off in your apartment. He said I could wait there, but it felt awkward when he left for his shift." She held up the spare key they gave to whichever squatter needed a place to crash. "Told me to lock up if I had to leave, so I thought I would grab some coffee and just get some fresh air for a while." Holly was in full-on ramble mode; she decided to leave out the inordinate amount of time she had actually been waiting.

 _The traitor!_ Gail had bumped into Chris at the station on her way out and the asshole hadn't given her any warning, _seriously what is with everyone? A little heads up too much to ask for?_ Sure, Gail had been busy teasing him about Traci, but he still could have said something. She would have to plot her revenge on her roommate later, there were more pressing matters at the moment. "So that's why you're here? To say good-bye?" Gail braced herself for the doctor to leave, again.

There were a lot of things Holly wanted to say but good-bye wasn't one of them. She had had plenty of time to think about things but she still hadn't come up with any logical explanation for why she had shown up on the blonde's steps when she should've been at the airport. She just wanted to see the younger woman again; she didn't want things left the way they were. "I didn't get the chance. You were gone...You left without any explanation." The sinking feeling that had encompassed her when she had realized she was alone still hung heavily on Holly and creeped into her words.

Gail had had an explanation, a good one, one that included her wanting to have this opportunity to talk but that was before she saw the papers. When she realized what the doctor had been holding back about, what she didn't want Gail to know, it had hurt the blonde more than she cared to admit. "You were sleeping."

That was a cop-out if the pathologist had ever heard one. Gail could've woken her up or at least left a note, something, anything so that she could have had a hint as to what was going on in the blonde's head. Any inkling as to why she ran off, again. "You didn't leave a note."

Gail shrugged, "Couldn't find any paper." She had looked after all; if she hadn't maybe her chest wouldn't feel so heavy right now as she looked at the woman who had stolen her heart. Who knew a chest could hurt so much when you're supposedly heartless?

Holly just shook her head. Gail was being particularly stubborn. She had hoped the conversation would have gone a little better than this, that maybe they could actually talk about what happened, why she had booked it out of the hotel room before the sun was even up, why the only thing left behind was a cold piece of metal. Gail might not be willing to give a satisfactory answer, but it couldn't stop Holly from asking the questions that were bugging her, she wanted to at least try to understand what was going on. She held up the charm that she had found on top of her papers that morning, "What's this?"

While all her previous responses had been automatic, Gail paused for a minute as she contemplated how to explain the pendant that Celery had given her the night before. The one that was supposed to mean eternal love, the one she had been told would be enough, "Belongs to you." _It's always belonged to you_ , she added to herself.

"Me? What is it?" Holly's natural curiosity was getting the best of her. She was getting off track.

"Doesn't matter." _Celery had been wrong; it's not enough_ , at least in Gail's head.

Holly couldn't understand why it was so hard for the two of them to talk. She was growing weary of having to drag every word from the blonde's lips. It probably wasn't fair or rational for Holly to be on the questioning end of things but Gail tended to bring out the irrational side of the pathologist. "Were you planning on giving it to me?"

"I was planning a lot of things, but none of it matters now." Gail couldn't help the bitterness that came with the statement. She had spilled her heart out the night before, she had been ready to do anything to have another shot with Holly but Holly had the chance to come back and she was hesitant to take it, so something was holding the doctor back. Gail couldn't help but feel like she was in way deeper than the other woman, like she had always been, and it made her feel vulnerable, and a vulnerable Gail was a guarded Gail.

Another evasive answer from the detective, another push from the pathologist, "Why not?"

Gail couldn't tell her, not now, not after finding out about the job. Something that a few years ago Holly would have been ecstatic to be offered and wouldn't have thought twice about. It was something that she would've been thrilled to tell Gail about but she hadn't, she chose not to, "Were you going to tell me about the job?"

There it was, confirmation that Gail had looked at the papers. She had seen the job offer and realized that Holly had kept quiet about it. Gail's tone wasn't angry, just disappointed and Holly could feel it, she wasn't used to disappointing people. She knew whatever explanation she gave probably wouldn't be enough, but Gail expected some kind of answer. She sighed and brushed her fingers through her hair, tugging nervously, "Technically, I tried to..."

"Tried to?" That's when Gail remembered that she had had a very hot doctor pressed against a wall who tried to stop them; she had wanted to talk. The images those thoughts evoked sent a blush straight to Gail's ears. "Jesus Christ Holly! We had the entire night to talk, you wait till I'm on the verge of ripping off your clothes to tell me about a job offer?"

Holly blushed too, "I wanted to talk about it earlier, but I didn't know how to. Last night was amazing and I didn't want to mess things up, when it was so nice to see you and dance with you, and talk to you, and just be with you."

It had been an amazing night but having a chance to have all of it again on a more permanent basis shouldn't have been a bad thing, "Why wouldn't you just tell me? It's a job offer, what were you so scared of?"

Holly wasn't sure anymore. She had rationalized not telling Gail the night before with so many reasons, she couldn't even articulate it if she tried. Actually facing Gail and trying to explain her thought process put her at a loss for words. "I don't know... " She was fumbling for a justification, "That I would make the decision for the wrong reasons..." _Crap, that came out wrong._

Gail immediately cut the doctor off, "There are wrong reasons?" _Like coming back for me? Because I wanted you to?_ _Like having another shot at us?_ Gail's mind immediately started trying to fill in the doctor's thoughts for her, jumping to conclusions before the other woman could even try to speak.

"It needed to be a professional decision but it felt personal too. You know how important it is to keep professional and personal separate. It's the only thing that's been able to keep me from coming back here." Ok, that definitely didn't come out the way Holly wanted it to.

The last words stung, "You make it sound like that's such a bad thing? If it is then why are you here at all? I didn't ask you to come back, I didn't invite you to the wedding last night, I didn't force you to see me. You know what, forget it, just go back to Boston or whatever place you fancy next." Yep, it didn't take much to trigger Gail's defense mechanisms, no matter how much she may have changed over the years; they were deeply ingrained in her.

Holly's words were failing here, everything she tried to say came out wrong even to her ears, she couldn't explain what kept her away except her pride and the realization that she had been the one to mess things up. She treaded carefully, "It's not a bad thing...I just didn't know how to..."

"How to what?"

"Come back... I'm good at starting over, starting fresh, that's what the job in San Francisco was and all the ones after. It's easier with new beginnings, but here...I didn't know what I would be coming back to..."

"So it was a test, or maybe it was one of your science experiments, you wanted to see if there was anything worth coming back for? If I was worth coming back for? Don't think about it so hard, I'm not worth it. Trust me. I'm damaged and dark and twisted. I'm selfish, bratty, and mean. I'm not anything special." Gail still couldn't control her self-loathing, and every word she said dripped with it.

"Gail..." That wasn't what it was about. Holly had always worried _she_ wasn't good enough for Gail, not the other way around. She had just been scared that if she tried to come back she would be rejected; she thought the feelings had only been one-sided. There was no way the blonde could have missed her as much as she had missed the prickly cop.

"No, really Holly, you were right, I'm not someone you should come back for." Gail didn't want to hear the platitudes Holly was about to use, she knew that gentle tone and it just cut at Gail even more.

"It wasn't like that, I wasn't testing you, I just didn't know what to choose, for the first time in my career I didn't know what the right decision was and we hadn't talked for so long and I knew how I felt but I didn't know how you would respond to seeing me or to me coming back or me having a reason to come back. I didn't want to screw things up or make assumptions or god...this just isn't coming out right. I didn't want you to feel pressured."

 _Pressured? She was worried that if she told you, you would freak out and climb a tree. She still doesn't trust you._ Gail had to say it, had to voice her suspicions, "You were worried I would run away."

"It wouldn't be the first time...And technically last night you ran away multiple times." And each time had sliced at Holly's heart in ways she didn't know were still possible. She would've thought three years and thousands of kilometers would have been enough to break the hold Gail had on her. But she had been wrong, very, very wrong.

Gail had run or at least tried to run a few times the night before, but she hadn't gotten very far and when she ultimately had the chance to get away, she stayed, she waited, she didn't let go. That should count for something. "I'm not the only one who runs, but I come back. I _always_ come back, can you say the same?"

 _No, but I'm here now, unless it's too late._ Holly thought that maybe the hurt they had caused each other had been too much, maybe it would've been better if she had stayed in Boston the whole time and just ignored the phone call. "I'm sorry I shouldn't have come here, I wasn't looking for a fight, or to mess up your life. I just wanted to see you." Holly got up to leave but her stuff was still in Gail's apartment, probably wasn't the best strategic planning on her part.

 _I wanted to see you too_ , _but one night isn't enough for me, I want more._ Gail couldn't let Holly leave just yet, none of it made sense to her, why Holly would come back for the weekend but not jump at the chance for a job she had been working for. "I still don't get it, you wanted this job a few years ago, you said it could take you at least ten years to get it and you did it in five. I thought you would be ecstatic."

Holly chuckled a little at the irony, "Of course you get it. Everyone else just assumed I only wanted to come back for you."

Gail smirked, "Let me guess Boob Job thought it was a waste to chase after some beat cop. Rachel thought that you should make the decision for professional reasons and Heather, well I don't really know Heather, but I'm guessing she mothered you and warned you that I would hurt you in some way, shape or form." _Not that they're wrong, well Boob Job is, technically I'm a detective now._

Holly nodded, "That was oddly accurate." Not that it should have surprised Holly; Gail had always been great at reading people. It did kind of surprise her that she had actually paid attention all the times Holly had talked about the other important people in her life, the same people who hadn't given her the chance to really talk about the job without judging her feelings, feelings she hadn't vocalized. Holly quietly continued, "I should've told you, I should've known you would be the one to understand what the job meant to me. Though, I'm surprised you remembered."

"I remember everything you said, Holly. Every word." The sincerity of Gail's words was reflected in the blue eyes locked firmly on the brunette.

Holly couldn't look away from the intensity, even as she blushed slightly and her smile quirked to the side, "Even when I ramble?"

"Especially when you ramble." Maybe it was the smile on Holly's face but Gail could feel some of the anger and disappointment fading, "Do you...do you want to tell me about it now?"

 _Yes!_ So she did. Holly spilled about the two jobs, and despite the tiredness that had settled into Gail's bones she listened patiently, absorbing every word and watching the way the doctor said them. She went into full-on Dr. Stewart ramble mode, rattling off all the positives and negatives about the jobs in a very clinical, objective way. She spoke about how successful she had been in the States, how nice it had been to receive recognition, she spoke about how badly she had wanted the Toronto job before she left, how if she hadn't left she never would've received the offer so soon in her career (she didn't mention why the position was open in the first place but Gail knew, or at least could speculate). She talked about how intimidating it was to come back to a place she had left so abruptly and how she didn't know how the lab would react to her promotion and return.

What she didn't mention was how lonely she had been in the States. How much she had missed her friends and family. How all the people she met and befriended failed to fill the gaping hole she felt deep in her soul. She didn't mention the women she had let into her bed to stave off the aching in her chest that started the day she left. She kept quiet about the constant desire to keep moving, keep searching for some kind of fulfillment with each job offer, something that she couldn't grasp. She left out how scared she was of settling down in Toronto, the permanency of it all, even though last night had been the first time in ages that Holly had felt whole again. No, those thoughts and feelings she kept to herself.

* * *

Gail felt like Holly was still holding back, there was more to the decision than she was letting on. But she decided to address what the doctor had actually said, "So the problem is you want both jobs and don't know which to pick?"

 _I want more than the jobs_ , Holly thought to herself before responding, "I guess."

"Well it's your decision, doc." Gail had no intention of trying to force Holly to come back. If the doctor had heard her speech the night before she would have known that. Gail couldn't bring herself to repeat those words, she was drained, and clearly Holly had worried about Gail's reaction, throwing herself at the woman and offering up a commitment might freak her out. If Holly wanted to be professional about this, then Gail wouldn't be the one to make it personal.

Holly sighed, "I know." A part of Holly was relieved that Gail had listened, heard her out, respected the fact that this was a professional decision, one she had to make for the sake of her career. But a part of her also wished that Gail would wildly profess her feelings and ask Holly to come back, but that wasn't fair of her to want, so she pushed the thoughts aside.

They each stood facing one another, leaning back on the banisters on each side of the steps only a couple of feet apart. A chasm that at the moment felt insurmountable.

Gail had waited for Holly to continue, to talk more about what she wanted, maybe what she wanted from her, but it didn't look like more was coming from the pensive brunette and Gail was exhausted. "Look, I'm tired and you have a plane to catch so let me know what you decide... or don't...Doesn't matter...I'll find out on my own in a couple weeks anyway." It was supposed to be an out for Holly, if she didn't want to talk to Gail, she didn't have to but Gail couldn't stand around waiting for the inevitable any longer.

That was when Holly noticed the dark circles under Gail's eyes and the fact that she was still wearing the same clothes as the night before. When she had bumped into Chris, he claimed to not know where Gail had been, just that she wasn't home. Holly had assumed Gail had simply been avoiding her. "What time did you leave this morning?"

"Around 4:15, got called in for a case. Like I said, you were sleeping."

"Someone tired me out." The words left Holly's mouth before she could control them. _Damn it, Stewart, you're not supposed to be flirting, you're supposed to be talking and clearing the air before you catch your flight._ _Why is your mouth failing you so miserably lately? Well, at least it didn't fail when it counted last night; ugh, you're incorrigible!_ Apparently, Holly had very little control of her thoughts or her words, but the banter had always been one of the best things about their relationship, platonic and romantic. She had been reminded of that the night before, when they had finally settled into the ease of being together again, before the morning of misconceptions occurred. It dawned on Holly that Gail hadn't fled her bed the night before because of regrets; she had gotten called into work. _A note still would've been nice_. _Oh well,_ t _ry for something neutral, Stewart_. "I hope it was an interesting case at least?"

Gail had smugly smirked at the doctor's first comment, she could remember the night before vividly, but thoughts of the case felt like a bucket of ice water down the blonde's back, killing any romantic thoughts and wiping the smile from her face. The scene had still been nagging at Gail; maybe talking about it would help. "Body drop in the old factory district, multiple stab wounds in a pattern matching a previous victim I saw a while ago when I was still in uniform. Both are Jane Does with little to go on. Actually, I probably owe you one, I had remembered what you told me about stab wounds, the differences in techniques and locations, helped me spot the consistency."

Holly smiled in a way that lit up her features, it was her science-y smile, and she couldn't help but excitedly start to talk about the differences in wound patterns, and to ask more details about the cases, even when Gail couldn't provide them, her big brain filled in the blanks. She had spent the last few years so immersed in her research that she had forgotten how much she enjoyed being a part of the action, of working to provide the evidence the police needed, how important her work was, even to the people who didn't understand half of the words she said. Her work was something that most people didn't appreciate, but Gail wasn't most people, she never had been.

This was the Holly that had first caught Gail's attention, the one who was completely enraptured by her work, who loved solving a puzzle, who enjoyed teaching others and sharing her knowledge; the one who Gail spent an entire day in the morgue with learning about diatoms and catching up on her medical jurisprudence. Gail couldn't help smiling at the thoughts, or at the glow radiating from the doctor.

Seeing the gorgeous blonde smiling goofily at her caused Holly to blush, "I'm nerding out and you're probably exhausted. I'm sorry."

"Don't be, it's nice to see how passionate you are about your work."

 _I can be passionate about a lot of things; you know that better than anyone else_... _Crap you really can't control yourself can you? Well at least you managed to keep one comment to yourself, why don't you try to keep this platonic_. "I still love what I do, I just haven't had much of a chance to do it. My research has kind of taken me away from what I used to do here. I didn't expect to get offered a chance to come back and do it again."

"You know having a job offered to you that didn't expect doesn't have to be a bad thing. If you don't want it, it's ok. If you do, you deserve it." Gail knew how it felt to work for something but not feel like you earned it, she had gone through it to make detective after the whole Peck-bombing-cover up debacle. It had taken her years to push herself to want more in her career, and it had taken even longer to make her feel like she deserved what she had earned. But Holly shouldn't have to doubt her work, she had earned it all, she deserved it all, and more in Gail's mind.

Holly thought about the lab, her former co-workers, and all the people she had worked with before she left, Gail hadn't been the only person she had abandoned abruptly, just the one that hurt the most to leave. "I don't know how many people would agree with you on that."

"Well people are stupid, I hate people. I can lend you my taser if you want, shock some sense into them." There was a mischievous glint in her piercing blue eyes, as Gail made the suggestion.

Holly chuckled at the thought and the gleam she could see on the blonde's face, "Ha, well I don't think I need to go that far"

"Offer stands." Gail smiled deviously before sobering up, wanting to convey exactly how much she meant the following words, "Seriously though, you've earned whatever recognition you've gotten. People will see that the minute they see you in action."

Holly shook her head slowly, "How can you have so much faith in me?"

"I always have, you radiate brilliance and you make people want to be better just by being around you." _People like me_ , Gail added to herself.

"Gail..." How could the woman that everyone claimed was cold and bitchy pay compliments so easily? Her words could still take Holly's breath away.

"It's true, trust me."

"I do trust you." Holly was surprised at how much she meant what she said. She did trust Gail, she had just forgotten, too blinded by everything that had happened between them, but in her gut, she trusted the blonde.

"Just not enough to tell me about the job before? Seriously Holly, what did you expect? What could I have possibly have done or said that would have been so bad?" The hurt was still there, lingering as Gail continued to wonder why the other woman had been so reluctant to talk to her.

Holly struggled to put her fears into words, what had she been afraid of? Acceptance? Rejection? She barely uttered her response, "Anything."

 _OK, that doesn't make any sense._ "What?"

Holly took a deep breath, "You could've said anything and it would've made my decision for me. If you told me to come back, I would've, if you told me to stay away, I would've, because that's how much you mean to me. Without even trying you can turn my whole world upside down." Finally, Holly admitted her feelings to both Gail and herself.

Gail was stunned, this was a far cry from just "having fun", but she had never been sure of the doctor's feelings for her, she had always felt like the one that had been in too deep, the one who had needed and wanted more, "And you don't think you do the same thing to me? Holly, nothing has been the same since I met you."

Gail wasn't in complete control as she slowly approached Holly, being pulled in by their irresistible chemistry, the one that would always put Gail back in Holly's orbit, closing the gap between them, but still not touching.

"What do you want?" This time, Gail wasn't talking about the jobs, she was talking about them, and she hoped they were finally on the same page.

Holly wanted another chance, but she also didn't want to lose the blonde again. "I don't know...could we start again? I don't know, be friends, something, anything?" _Ugh, Stewart, you're an idiot and a coward, that's not what you want and you know it!_

Gail stepped back, stunned, the rug feeling like it had been pulled from her feet. "That's what you want? To be _friends_?" The word slipped bitterly off Gail's tongue, leaving an awful taste in her mouth. She had enough _friends_ , that wasn't what she wanted with Holly and she had thought-no, hoped-the doctor had felt the same way.

Holly shrugged helplessly, she was still scared to want more, "I don't want to lose you, Gail. I can't go back to never talking again." That much she was sure of. After the last 24 hours, she couldn't survive not having Gail in her life any longer.

Gail shook her head dejectedly, "I can't..."

"Can't what?"

"I can't be friends with you."

 _Wait, what?_ The words hit Holly like a ton of bricks, "Why not? You're friends with all your other exes. I should know I interacted with a lot of them last night." Gail was the definition of the lesbian cliché. Holly didn't understand why she was different.

"Because they're exes...past tense. I don't have feelings for them, not anymore. I can't just be your friend..." Gail took a deep breath before continuing, "I can't be your wingman and help you meet people. I can't stand by and watch you move on with someone else. I want you to be happy, Holly, I do, but I want to be the one who makes you happy."

The brunette was stunned at how open and honest the normally enigmatic blonde was being about her feelings, "You do?"

"Of course I do, whatever it takes, I want you to be happy. If that's here in Toronto, great, if it's in Boston, that's ok too. I'm not asking you to come back for me, Holls, I'm asking you to give us a chance no matter what you choose." Gail had finally managed to say the words, to open herself up to the possibility of heartache again, but she had to try. Holly had to know that Gail wanted them to try again and she was willing to work for it.

Holly couldn't believe what she was hearing, in all the scenarios she had played out in her mind since getting the job offer, she had never imagined that Gail would be willing to give them another shot even if she didn't come back. "Gail, you said long distance doesn't work. You said you would never leave Toronto." They had fought about this before she left for San Francisco, the words burned into her memory, taunting her the last few years.

"Well I'm all about growing these days." Gail teased. She looked into the brunette's eyes, "I mean it though, job or no job, I want another chance if you'll have me. I don't want to lose you either, but I can't be around you and pretend like I don't want to be with you, kiss you, fall asleep with you in my arms, and wake up beside you. I can't pretend like I'm ok being your friend when I'm always going to want more."

Well that certainly put many of Holly's doubts to rest, it didn't matter what she chose to do about the job, Gail wanted to be with her. But some doubts still lingered, they weren't the same people anymore, they couldn't fit the way they had before, maybe they were jumping the gun. "Gail, it's been three years, we've both changed, you might not still feel that way about me anymore."

This time Gail was confident in her answer, "Maybe, maybe not, but if last night is any indication of what I have to look forward to, I'm going to enjoy getting to know the new Holly Stewart. But I just can't do that as your friend."

But friends had always worked for them and they couldn't just dive back into a relationship, that hadn't worked for them the first time. "So what do you suggest?"

Gail smiled, the answer was simple really, "Would you like to go on a date with me Lunchbox?"

 _Ok, this is insane, all these declarations of feelings and she asks you on a date?_ Holly pointed out the obvious, "I'm supposed to be on a plane back to Boston in about an hour."

Gail rolled her eyes, "I didn't mean right now, I want to date you, take you out, feed you, get to know you again, maybe score a kiss goodnight. There's no rush, I just want the chance, that's all I'm asking for, and we can do it here or in Boston, no pressure." She had drifted closer to the brunette again, wanting to reach out and touch her but still scared to do so; she needed Holly to meet her halfway.

Holly didn't know what to say, this was more than she had hoped for when she had taken the cab ride over from her hotel. She didn't know what she had expected, but Gail Peck saying she wanted another chance hadn't been it. So she did what she always did best, she gave into the pull that Gail had on her. She leaned in to the other woman's space, brushing her lips against the blonde's, "I would love to go on a date with you detective."

And Gail closed the gap between them, capturing Holly's lips in a slow, long kiss. A kiss to remind them that they had all the time in the world, a promise that there would be more kisses to come.

When the kiss finally broke, Holly wrapped the other woman in her arms and smiled her crooked smile, "By the way, I think I made a decision."

* * *

_Three weeks later..._

Gail finished blotting her face dry as she checked her reflection in the mirror one last time. She was pleased with the results of her ministrations: her face clean and fresh, lips naked, she had a faint trace of natural blush across her cheeks that livened up her pale skin, but it was her eyes that were the real masterpiece. The normally icy blue eyes had a twinkle to them, a spark that had been missing for years. She brushed her hand over her hair. It had been cut short again since the wedding and she couldn't help but think about the first pixie haircut, and who gave it to her. Before Gail could give it, or that person any more thought, she was pulled from her memories by a knocking on the bathroom door.

"I swear to God Gail, hurry the hell up or I'm leaving without you."

Gail opened the door with a goofy smile, "Empty threats, Nerd." She dangled the keys to the truck in front of the brunette.

Holly reached for the keys but Gail was too quick and kept them out of her grasp. So Holly rolled her eyes at the childish antics of the woman she was dating. "You ready?"

"Depends, please tell me that was the last box," Gail whined dramatically.

"It was, you know you didn't have to do this." Gail had arrived in Boston that Thursday night as a surprise, a surprise that Holly had happily accepted.

"Of course I did, Lunchbox, you think I would pass up the opportunity for an eight-and-a-half hour car ride with the coolest chick I know?"

"I still can't believe you came all the way over here to help me move."

"OK first of all you don't have a car, secondly Chris has a truck and owes me like a million favors, and third I really wanted to see the city that was losing you." Gail had been more than happy to take a long weekend to check out Boston before the brunette came back to Toronto. Gail had been pleasantly surprised when the doctor had decided to take the job offer; especially when she found out the Holly had made the decision even before Gail had declared her feelings. Turned out, the pathologist had wanted another shot too; she just wasn't as articulate at sharing that thought. (Stealing her roommate's truck was an added bonus. He still owed her from the wedding and her help setting up him and Traci.)

Holly had already packed up most of her stuff over the last few weeks and had shipped back a lot of it. So that weekend had been relatively stress-free and had given her a chance to show Gail the city she had been living in. "So what did you think of it?"

"It's not bad," And it hadn't been, Boston had a lot of cool things to offer and it did remind Gail a lot of Toronto, "You sure you want to do this Holls? You know you don't have to, I meant what I said: you don't have to go back for me. I'm willing to make it work no matter where you live."

"I know you meant it and I appreciate it, honey, but I'm not just going back for you. I'm going back for me; I miss the city, and my family and friends. Getting to be with you is just a bonus." She gave the blonde a quick kiss on the lips.

Grinning giddily Gail asked, "Alright then Lunchbox, ready to head home?"

 _Home with Gail Peck_ , that had a nice ring to it. Holly was ready to go back to Toronto, she was excited see the new townhouse she had picked out online and that Gail had gone to see for her in person, one that she had deemed nerd-worthy (one that Gail had been planning on spending a shit ton of time at). For once, Holly was looking forward to the prospect of settling down somewhere for the long haul, "Absolutely."

* * *

They locked up the apartment Holly had rented and climbed into the overstuffed car. Gail started up the engine, letting the stereo ring out, this time she didn't feel the need to punch the dashboard.

"Oooh, do I get to hear the rest of that playlist from the wedding." Holly teased as she reached for Gail's iPod.

"Absolutely not, Lunchbox. That had been our break-up playlist, one I don't plan on playing again anytime soon." _Or ever, if I can help it_ , but that thought was jumping the gun.

"Fine, fine, I'll let it go this time but I'm still snooping through your music collection." Holly made herself comfortable as she flicked through the device.

"Whatever, nerd."

As they settled onto the highway, Gail had one hand on the wheel, the other resting on Holly's leg, keeping them connected. Turning the music to a dull background noise, "Alright, it's your turn, ask me anything?" The two women had been trading turns asking one another questions that the other had to answer truthfully. It was a game they had been playing since Holly had caught a late flight back to Boston a few Sundays ago. It was a way for Gail to show how serious she had been about them starting over and a way to make it easier for the two of them to talk, since technically they were only in the early stages of dating, even if it was round three.

Holly smiled, she had been enjoying the ease and comfort that came so easily to the two of them when they weren't hiding how they felt or questioning the other's feelings. They still had a long way to go but she had been enjoying the whole dating and getting reacquainted phase they were in. Right now, she had eight hundred eighty-five kilometers to get to know the woman beside her.

_It seemed like a great place to start..._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright folks, that's all she wrote...This wasn't meant to have as much angst as it did, but I needed the girls to work through the issues the show had dealt them so they could have a clean slate. I hope I did the characters justice. I originally wrote this before finding out the show had been officially cancelled, but it was cathartic for me (hopefully for you as well). I'd love to hear what you think.


End file.
